Breathe Me
by afragilelittlehuman
Summary: Deserted by her first love, Bella leaves Forks and finds a new path. A new friendship causes her past to resurface. Will she return to a life that broke her heart? Crossover primarily Twilight , AU, OOC, rated M for language, violence, & later lemons.
1. Trapped in the Past

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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**Chapter 1: Trapped in the Past**

Like every other night, she was awakened by her own screaming. It would take hours to fall asleep, only to have the nightmare wake her up again. The screaming always made her throat burn, and, like every other night, she went to the bathroom for a cool glass of water. Her father, having grown accustomed to the nightly ritual, didn't leave his own bed, although she was sure he was alert and listening.

She shuffled the few feet between the rooms, barely having the energy to pick her feet up off the floor. With almost robotic precision, she picked up the water glass, turned on the faucet, and filled the glass with just enough water to sooth the burning. A brief flicker of moonlight shot across the mirror above the sink, and she instinctively turned her head to follow it.

For the first time in months, she looked, really looked at herself in the mirror. She was pale and her face gaunt. Her clothes, hanging off her, were disordered and wrinkled. Her long hair was wild. She couldn't remember if she'd even eaten all day.

_Did I actually go to school looking like this?_

Ever since _He_ left her in the woods, she'd been in a thick fog. If she thought about _Him_ too long, the ragged hole in her chest began to hurt. She found that clearing her mind and her emotions numbed the pain. She could do that for a few weeks, couldn't she? Only the weeks had become months.

Looking at herself now, she realized that she was tired of the hole, tired of hurting. She clenched the glass in her hand.

_Fuck him!_

She threw the glass at her reflection, and it shattered loudly into a million pieces, raining glass and water all over the bathroom floor. She knew there was no way Charlie wouldn't have heard that.

"Bella! Bella! Are you alright?" Charlie yelled as he ran into the bathroom.

She tiptoed around the glass and walked into the hallway. "I'm fine, I'm fine. I just dropped the damn glass."

"Dropped?" Charlie sighed as he saw the webbed cracks in the mirror. "It looks like you threw it to me. What in the world is going on?"

"I just didn't want to look at myself anymore."

"Bella, I know this has been a hard time for you, but I don't think I can watch you walk around this house like a zombie anymore. It's no good for you, and it's breaking my heart." Bella could see tears welling up in Charlie's eyes, and his usually squared shoulders sagged in defeat.

_My God, what have I done to him?_

She walked into her room and sat on her bed, motioning Charlie to sit beside her. "I'm so sorry, Dad. I just…I don't know…"

He sat down and took her hand gently between his. She noticed how small her hand looked wrapped in his warm, rough fingers, and she remembered feeling so safe when he held her hand as a child. She once again regretted all she'd missed those years living in Phoenix with her mother, and it made the realization of Charlie's pain more acute.

Charlie hesitated then spoke quickly. "I've talked to Renee, and she and Phil would be glad to have you in Jacksonville with them. I think getting out of this town is just what you need, Bells."

"I want to leave. I want to be anywhere but here, Dad. But I don't want to go anywhere without you."

Charlie's eyes widened in surprise. "You'll leave, then, if I go with you?"

"I know it's a lot to ask…"

"No, Bells," Charlie said, pulling Bella into his arms and giving her the first hug she could remember in years. "I'll do anything for you to be happy again. Anything."

Relief washed over her, and the hole in her chest throbbed a little less. As much as she tried, she couldn't stop the sobs that shook her entire body. Charlie lovingly cradled her in his arms, smoothing her hair as he stroked the back of her head.

"Oh, Dad, thank you so much! I'm so ready to be away from here."

_The sooner the better._

***

With his long, distinguished service, Charlie had little trouble finding a job as police chief of a small city in Alabama. Bella had never heard of Guntersville before, but a quick Google search revealed it was twice the size of Forks and much warmer. The sunny days vastly outnumbered the cloudy, and it was on the banks of the Tennessee River.

Since she was a senior and it was so late in the school year, Charlie reluctantly agreed that Bella would not return to high school after the move. Instead, she planned to take her GED as soon as they were settled and work as an administrative assistant at the police station until she decided what to do about college. She didn't tell Charlie that she didn't have the slightest interest in college anymore. He had enough worry on his plate for now.

Renee was disappointed that Bella wasn't moving to Jacksonville, but she was happy that at least Alabama wasn't a continent away from Florida. There were even some minor league baseball teams there, and she knew Phil could find a job with one of them. Bella wasn't sure having everyone in the same state was a great idea, but she kept that thought to herself.

A few times during her packing, _He_ would pop into her mind, but Bella pushed those thoughts away by keeping busy. _He _took her photographs and the CD of her lullaby, but the plane tickets from Carlisle and Esme and the car stereo from the others were still in the floor of her closet. Those things and anything else that reminded her of _Him_ went into a box, and she planned to burn the entire lot in the back yard. Unfortunately, when she went to get the box her last night in the house, it was gone.

_Damn it, Charlie! I better not find that in my new room!_

As Charlie lifted the last box into the moving van, Bella looked back on the empty house. There were many memories living in that house, and, as far as she was concerned, they could stay there.

"Charlie, I need to do one more thing before we leave."

Charlie slammed the van's gate shut. "Sure, Bells. I'm just going to chain up your truck to the trailer hitch."

Bella walked slowly through the door and into the bare house, and her footsteps echoed through the empty rooms. She looked at the bare living room wall where the flat screen once hung. Charlie had given the television to Billy Black, who was speechless for probably the first time in his life. Jacob helped Charlie hang the TV in the small reservation house, and the guys watched one last baseball game together. Remembering how Jacob's warm eyes had stared at her the entire night made Bella blush.

Climbing the stairs, she stopped in her bedroom doorway. The bed she'd shared so many nights with _Him_ was still in the middle of the room. Even though he was willing to buy her anything, it was the only piece of furniture she asked Charlie to replace. She extended her arm to run her hand across the mattress but snapped it back like the bed was on fire before she even touched it.

The bathroom seemed strange without Bella's and Charlie's things fighting for shelf space. Charlie replaced the broken mirror for the young family that bought the house, and, taking a long look at herself, she was happy to see the color had returned to her face. From her back pocket, she pulled out the sharp scissors she'd used to cut the twine tied around the moving boxes.

Charlie looked over at Bella as she jumped in the van's cab, and she heard him gasp. "What did you do, Bells?"

She ran her fingers through her freshly shorn hair, hanging two inches above her shoulders. "It'll be too hot in Alabama for all that hair. This will be much better."

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Charlie shake his head as he put the van in drive and pulled away from the house. She watched as the landmarks of her time in Forks passed outside the window. The woods. The diner. The police station. The high school. As she left each one behind, the weight on her shoulders lightened, and the hole in her chest closed a little more. When they passed the city limit sign, she smiled at Charlie and sighed.

_Good riddance to that God-forsaken place and everyone in it._

Leaning back, she closed her eyes to sleep a little on the long drive. Somehow, she knew this time she wouldn't wake up screaming.


	2. Somewhere Greener, Somewhere Warmer

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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**Chapter 2: Somewhere Greener, Somewhere Warmer**

Charlie vigorously shook Bella's arm. "Welcome to Alabama, Bells!"

Bella opened her sleepy eyes and immediately squinted from the bright sunlight streaming through the truck windows. Rubbing her eyes with a balled fist, she finally focused on the road, and she thought about how much it looked like a lot of the other roads they'd taken over the last four days.

"Alabama? What happened to Kentucky and Tennessee?"

"You slept through both. But I didn't want you to miss the rocket."

She looked at Charlie as if he'd begun speaking Klingon. "Rocket? What in the world are you talking about?"

Charlie pointed to the right side of the highway. "That rocket."

There it was, towering over the interstate, a gleaming white structure, just like the 60s spaceships she'd seen in history books. The rocket seemed so tall, culminating in a needle point high in the air. She could see, through the large windows of another building, a second rocket on display in pieces.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Charlie was smiling like a little boy. "That one in the building is an authentic Saturn V rocket, just like the one that took men to the moon."

Bella laughed at his enthusiasm. "Yeah, it is pretty cool. But what in the world is it doing in the middle of Alabama?"

"We're driving through Huntsville, and the NASA guys here were very involved in the space race. They're still pretty involved with the space program in general."

"When did you become such an expert on the space program?"

"Oh, I watched lots of the History Channel back in Forks. And I got a pretty thorough introduction to the area when I flew down for my interview."

Bella imperceptibly flinched at the mention of Charlie's brief trip to Alabama. After everything, he was very reluctant to leave her behind in Forks, even for three days. She knew that dragging his recently insane daughter along for the interview would not look very professional, and she insisted she'd be alright by herself. Luckily, Angela offered to stay with her, and the days weren't completely unbearable. Bella only wished she'd realized sooner how good a friend Angela could be. She promised Angela lots of emails from Alabama once Charlie assured her that, yes, there was Internet access there.

Charlie took an exit not far from the rocket. "This is where we finally get off the interstate."

The road wound around and into town, cutting through what looked like an industrial area similar to Port Angeles. Huntsville, on the other hand, seemed much larger, ringed in the distance by large, wooded hills. As they continued to drive, Bella saw a number of large brick buildings that seemed fairly new, connected by an over-road sky-walk and what looked like an elevated tram. The buildings were all medical offices, and, in the center, was a large hospital. It put the little hospital in Forks to shame, and she couldn't help but think that Carlisle would be impressed.

"Well, Dad," Bella said, giggling, "it looks like they're certainly prepared for any medical emergency my clumsy ass can stumble into."

He reached over and patted her hand. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that. But it is good to hear you laugh again."

Charlie had never been one to do a lot of touching, but, since _He_ left and Bella had disappeared inside herself, that had changed. He still didn't hover, but she liked the new touchy-feely Charlie. She'd always known he loved her, but it was nice to be reminded more often.

_At least one good thing came out of this whole mess._

The road began to curve around the first of the deep green hills. Darker shades of green sloped into lighter shades of green then back, continuing for several miles.

"How far are we from Guntersville anyway?"

Charlie looked at the GPS, a going-away present Bella bought him with money she made working at the Newton's store. He prided himself in never needing directions but graciously accepted it. It had been very useful when he wanted to take little side trips off I-80. "Looks like we have about 30 minutes still. Want to hear something funny?"

"Sure, knock me out."

"Well, it's not _that _funny. Did you know the locals call this a _mountain_?"

Bella chuckled, remembering the high peaks and cliffs back home.

_Home...well, this is home now._

"Yeah, I know. They haven't seen the mountains we have, have they Bells? These are actually foothills of the Appalachian mountain chain."

"More History Channel?"

Charlie puffed up his chest. "Nope, I looked that one up all on my own."

"Dad?"

"Yeah, Bells."

She bit her lip and scrunched her eyebrows together before tentatively speaking. "Is this...is moving here going to make you terribly unhappy? I know it's probably a little late to ask..."

"Hey," he said, once again lovingly patting her hand, "don't you worry about that. I'm good, better than good. You're always saying I should change things up, and how much more can you change things up than moving across the country?"

"But you wouldn't be moving if it weren't for me."

"Everything needs a catalyst, Bells."

She smiled despite herself. "Wow, that's an impressive use of vocabulary."

"I'm tellin' ya', you should watch the History Channel more often."

"So, I guess we'll have cable, then."

"Cable, Internet...nothing's too good for my girl." Charlie looked over at her, and his big grin instantly eased her mind. "But back to your original question. I'll miss Forks and everyone there, but this move is giving me the opportunity to be the chief at a bigger department in a city twice the size. And, with the river and lakes, I can fish myself to death."

Charlie must have impressed the Guntersville city council, because he'd barely gotten home from the airport before the phone rang with the job offer. She had to admit it was a good opportunity, and Charlie said, after a few years, he might even move up to a much larger department like Huntsville's. Not only had her request to move brought her out of the never-ending fog, it had awakened a ambition in Charlie neither of them knew existed.

"Well, I'd prefer that you didn't fish yourself to death, if it's all the same to you."

"If you insist. The important question is, though, are _you _okay?"

Bella ran her hand nervously through her hair. The shorter length was taking some getting used to, and she wasn't entirely sure cutting it hadn't been a mistake. "I'm a little nervous, but that's just my general state, I think. After everything, a new adventure would be nice, though."

"I'm not a big fan of the haircut. Is that part of the adventure?"

"Yeah, I guess. Probably should have let someone do it for me, though."

Charlie concentrated for a second. "I think there's a salon down the street from the station. We'll make you an appointment as soon as we get to town, if you want. Speaking of town, here we are."

On the right was the first of the lakes, blue and clear. Several boats were scattered over the water, and a row of houses lined the far bank. The road curved around the lake, and another lake containing more boats and a few jet-skis appeared on the left. Another curve and they approached the river. Just like the lakes, the water was blue and clear, small gentle waves only disrupted by the wake of the boats. A barge carrying dozens of shipping containers made its way down the river away from the bridge. Just then, Bella knew Charlie was going to love it here.

The bridge led into a one-way street cutting through downtown. Quaint storefronts lined both sides of the street, and the municipal court building and city hall blended in with the older buildings. The first restaurant she saw was a pizza place, and she knew they'd spend lots of time there. The post office on the right was the tallest building on the street, and not far from it was the salon Charlie remembered.

"Dad, where's the police station?"

"Oh, it's on the back side of the court building. We just have to go around the block to get to the street that goes the other direction."

Charlie turned left, then left again. A block later, they pulled into the parking lot of the police station. The canopy over the door was the same blue as the lakes, and the waves painted on the cruisers were the identical light color. City hall extended back along the right side of the parking lot. Charlie parked the van, towing Bella's ancient red pickup, horizontally across a line of spaces in the back.

Charlie climbed down out of the van. "What are they going to do, give the new police chief a ticket? I need to go in and pick up my uniforms. You can come see your desk, too."

Walking through the double glass doors, Charlie and Bella approached the front desk. A tall man with red spiky hair and a wide, friendly face was struggling with a phone that seemed to be constantly ringing.

He stammered into the receiver. "Yes, um, yes, I know, sir. Yes, sir, I imagine your property values are sinking as we speak. No, sir, I didn't mean..." He brought the receiver a arm's length away and stared at it. "Crap, he hung up on me."

Charlie stifled a laugh. "Hard day at the office?"

The man looked embarrassed and smoothed down his uniform shirt. "Yes, sir. We don't have a receptionist right now, and we're all helping out until the new chief arrives and hires a new one. Can I help you?"

"Yeah, the new police chief? That would be me."

"Oh, crap...I mean, sorry, sir." He nervously extended his hand. "Nice to meet you, sir."

Charlie shook the stuttering man's hand. "Charlie Swan, nice to meet you, too. And your name is?"

"Jackson Glenn, sir. I'm one of the patrol officers."

"Well, Glenn, this is our new receptionist, my daughter Bella."

Glenn offered his hand to Bella as well, and smiled broadly when she shook it firmly. "Great to meet you, miss. You don't know how much the guys are looking forward to not answering the phones."

The friendly, drawling officer put Bella immediately at ease, and she laughed. "Thanks. I'm looking forward to getting started tomorrow. And call me Bella."

"Sure thing, miss...I mean, Bella."

Charlie looked around the station and spotted his office in the back. "Glenn, how 'bout giving us a quick tour of the station?"

"Yes, sir, just let me put this cordless in my pocket in case Mr. Jones calls back."

Glenn was a gracious and thorough tour guide, leading them around the station and giving them a little background on current events in town. His last stop was Charlie's office, which was slightly bigger than his office in Forks. Bright sunlight streamed through the windows, making it feel a little less like a police station. Charlie picked up his uniforms, navy blue and crisp with starch, and they headed towards the door. Before they left, Glenn invited them both to have dinner with him and his wife later in the week. To Bella's surprise, Charlie accepted.

The drive to the new house took them back toward the river then down a winding road through the woods along the lake. Everything was very green with new Spring growth, and Bella was reminded of the woods near their home in Forks. It was a lot warmer, here, though, and more humid. She noticed a series of signs directing traffic to a state park, and they seemed to be going the same way.

One last left turn led them towards a two-story house surrounded by trees. Charlie pulled the van into the circular drive, and the sound of metal scraping asphalt followed.

Bella grimaced. "Oops!"

"I guess you'll do that a lot," Charlie said jokingly. "I should probably have the undercarriage reinforced."

As soon as the van came to a stop, Bella jumped through the passenger door and took a long look at their new home. The pale yellow house stood away from the road, with a two-car garage jetting off the left to form a V that framed the center of the drive. A sandstone arch surrounded the door, and there were large windows on both floors. It looked bright, inviting, and completely unlike their old house. Bella couldn't help but think that it looked almost _cheerful_.

She was still engrossed in the house when Charlie walked to her side and put his arm around her shoulders.

"What do you think, Bells? It was hard picking out something from emailed pictures and websites, but I think I did good."

"It's...perfect! Where's my room?"

Charlie unlocked the door and led Bella inside. The house was just as cheerful inside as out, with an open floor plan that was very unlikely the almost claustrophobic house in Forks. Bella could see the kitchen, which was large and shiny, and the sun-filled den. She grinned, her eyes wide with excitement.

_Everything is just so pretty and bright, almost as bright as the Cullen's house!_

Charlie pointed up the stairs. "Your bedroom is up there on the right."

Bella sprinted up the stairs and through the bedroom door. Like every other room in the house, her room was bright with sunlight. The walls were painted the palest blue, and against the center of the far wall stood a large wrought-iron bed with at least a dozen fluffy pillows thrown all over it.

"I hope you like the bed," Charlie yelled from downstairs. "The ladies from Officers Benevolent helped me on that one!"

"It's wonderful, Dad. Makes me just want to go to sleep. Oh my God, I've got my own bathroom!"

She ran into the bathroom, almost slipping on the tiled floor. The large bowled sink sat on a pedestal underneath a large mirror, and shelves where built into the wall on either side. The shower doors were frosted glass, and a small slit window high on the wall allowed sunlight to stream into the room without sacrificing privacy. When she walked back into the bedroom, Charlie stood in the doorway.

"Hey, I think I could get used to that big smile on your face. I'm glad you like everything."

"Wait a minute, is this the master bedroom? You didn't have to give me this room."

Charlie laughed. "What's an old guy like me going to do with a bedroom like this? Just give me four walls and a closet, and I'm fine. By the way, you've got a huge closet right here, too."

Scanning the room to find the closet doors, Bella then noticed how all the sunlight was getting into the room. Two French doors, each comprised of a dozen small windows, led to a balcony overlooking the woods behind the house. Bella unlocked the doors and walked outside.

"Wow, now this is awesome."

"Every Juliet needs a balcony for her Romeo, Bells."

Bella stiffened. "Dad..."

"I'm sorry. It just kinda slipped out. Forgive me?"

Bella turned and smiled at Charlie, and the changing of his expression from worry to relief was instantaneous. "No problem. It's a beautiful view."

"Why don't you stay here and enjoy it for a few before we start unloading the van? I need to go downstairs and call Renee and Billy to let them know we made it here alive."

"That would be great. Just give me a yell when you're ready."

Bella had already turned back toward the trees when Charlie walked out of the room. She thought about how much trouble Charlie had gone to, how hard he'd tried to make everything perfect for her. And it was. She hadn't felt this good in months, and even Charlie's slip of the tongue couldn't ruin her mood.

_No more Romeos for me. Who says Juliet needs a guy to enjoy her own damn balcony?_

Bella was still giggling to herself when Charlie called her downstairs.


	3. Get Ready for the Storm

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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**Chapter 3: Get Ready for the Storm**

_B,_

_How are things in Bama? Ben and I are getting ready for graduation. He's helping me with a ton of invitations my mom is making me send. I can't believe you won't be graduating with us :(_

_Speaking of, now that you got your GED, what are you going to do? There's lots of good colleges down there. Geez, now I sound like my mom!_

_Anyways, enjoy the sun – it's raining here again today. Can I run away and come live with you? ;)_

_Later,_

_A_

Bella started a new email message, but she was unsure what to write. Renee had emailed the exact same question the night before, and Charlie had begun to hint that it was time to make a decision. She'd made a decision, but it wasn't one she thought anyone would like. She closed the message, deciding to email Angela later.

The first two months in Guntersville had been mostly uneventful. She and Charlie settled into a comfortable routine. Charlie left for work at an ungodly hour, and Bella would follow in her pickup truck around 8 A.M. It was a short drive, and Bella could sleep in fairly late without having to rush to be on time.

She enjoyed her job, answering the general line for the station. She generally fielded calls for Charlie, although sometimes the calls were about a cat in a tree or a wife wondering when her police officer husband would be home for dinner. The police department was bigger than the one in Forks, but small enough that she knew everyone's name after a few weeks. There wasn't a lot of big crime, save the occasional meth lab bust, and the people in general were very friendly and polite. She thought the Most Wanted page on the web site said it all; practically everyone on it was wanted for failure to pay fines.

At work, Charlie was back to his usual gruff personality. He was tough but fair with the officers, and they all respected him for it. He treated Bella like he did everyone else, lest someone think he was showing her favor. At home, though, he was still mushy Charlie, and Bella enjoyed their new comradery. Charlie had made a few fishing buddies, including the newly retired former police chief, but Bella mostly only emailed Angela and talked to Glenn, the officer she met the first day in town.

The department was one big family, and they'd welcomed Charlie and Bella with open arms. She, in turn, had become attached to the men and women on the force and always told them to be safe while out on patrol. Having grown to respect them, the last thing she wanted was to not see them walk through the double doors at the end of their shifts.

Her cell phone chirped, and she looked at the screen. Charlie was very fond of the push-to-talk feature, and she expected to see his name. This time, however, it was Glenn.

"Hey, what's up?" she said, gingerly pushing the Talk button.

"Just wanted to let you know that the wife called and said there's a line of storms headed this way. You might want to turn the TV on a local station and let the Chief know."

The way Glenn treated her, like a little sister, reminded her of Emmett, and she shook the memory away. "Okay. You be safe, Jackson."

The phone chirped again. "Will do, Bella."

Bella turned back to her computer and pulled up the weather warnings map. There was a strong line of storms moving through Mississippi into western Alabama, and tornado warnings had been issued all along the line. Guntersville was already under a tornado watch. She was still getting used to speed with which the Alabama weather could change from beautiful to ugly then back again. The dispatcher in the next room was always busiest when there was bad weather; there always seemed to be a few downed trees or stranded boaters afterward.

After tuning to a local TV channel and calling Charlie with the weather report, Bella returned to her desk and sunk into her chair. She slowly swiveled the chair to face Charlie's office, thinking about the conversation she wanted to have with him about college. She was almost certain she knew what his reaction would be.

_I would pick the only job he'll never let me have._

Earlier in the week, she asked Glenn to have lunch with her at the pizza place next door. Charlie didn't think Bella should fraternize with the officers, but, since Glenn seemed harmless, he agreed to disagree.

After they finished their lunch, Bella looked around nervously. A small town, even a friendly one, had a million ears. She began her questioning tentatively. "Jackson, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure thing, Bella," Glenn said, wiping a bit of tomato sauce off his cheek.

"Why did you decide to become a cop?"

He thought for a moment, scratching his head. "I don't know. It was kinda like a callin'."

"A calling? Like from God?"

"Not exactly...well, maybe. I always knew I wanted to help and protect people, but I wasn't always sure how to do that."

Bella leaned closer, listening intently. "How did you finally decide?"

"Why are you so interested?" Glenn's expression turned from confused to shocked in a second. "Oh, shit! You want to be a cop!"

"Shush! Do you want everyone in the damn restaurant to hear you?"

"Your dad is gonna have a cow. And then he'll kill me for talkin' to you."

"No, he won't," Bella said unconvincingly. "But, really, what made you do it?"

"I have some friends on the force in Birmingham, and, after talking to them and learning about what they do, I knew it was the life for me. What you have to understand is it's not just a job. If you're a good cop, it's your _life_. And, if it's your time, it can be your death, too."

For the first time, Bella let herself think about what police work really meant to Charlie and the danger he faced doing it. She wasn't completely sure she was ready, but she wanted to find out. "Can you tell me more?"

Glenn leaned back in his chair and patted his stomach. "I think we're going to need more pizza."

After the second pizza was history and she and Glenn parted ways, Bella spent many hours coming up with just the right plan to convince Charlie to go along with it. As she went over the script in her head once more, her cell phone made her jump. This time it was Charlie.

"Bells, we're sending out the cruisers to be ready for storm response. I'm going out, too. The locals say it could get bad soon."

"I was going to go home, but now I think I'll stay here." Bella liked staying at the station during a storm; the basement there was so much larger than the storm cellar under their house. "Give me a call before you head home in case I'm still here."

_Chirp_. "No problem."

Bella noticed the weatherman had taken over the local TV coverage, and he agreed that the storm was a strong one. There were reports of damage all over northwestern Alabama and no sign that the line was weakening. She was just beginning to learn the tornado lingo, and the frequent mention of "hook echo" was not good. Warnings were beginning to be issued in the county to their immediate west.

_Guess I'll spend the night in the basement again._

Watching as the line on the radar moved closer and closer to Guntersville, she grabbed several message pads to ready herself for the onslaught of calls they always had after a storm. She also checked with the dispatcher, making sure he had everything he needed. He never left his desk, no matter the weather, because, he said, he needed to be there if someone needed help.

When Bella returned to her desk, she looked out the double doors. The sky was a sick shade of green, and everything had taken on a similar green pallor. She walked outside, standing under the canopy, and saw a very dark line of clouds to the west. The hills made it hard to tell what was happening underneath those clouds, but she didn't think it could be good. As the clouds moved over the city, Bella heard the unmistakable sound of hail hitting metal and wood.

She turned to go back into the station just as the civil defense siren sounded, and, pausing only long enough to grab her cell phone, she sprinted down into the basement. The hail was unrelenting, pounding down for what seemed like forever. Somewhere in the station, a window broke, and Bella was sure her poor truck would be a battered mass of scrap metal when it was all over. She sat down, listening and waiting.

Like the hail, the rainfall began suddenly and was torrential. The thunder sounded like it was directly overhead, and each boom was followed by a flicker of the lights and a shudder of Bella's entire body. This was by far the worst storm she'd experienced, and it rattled her. Then, just as suddenly as it began, everything stopped and was silent.

Before Bella had a chance to stand, she hear a low, loud roar, like a hundred jet engines.

One last flicker, and the lights in the station were out. The roar continued, and Bella was sure she heard, in the distance, grinding metal and shattering glass.

Finally, the roar stopped, and the generator kicked into action. A slow, gentle rain began falling, although the thunder still boomed in the distance.

Bella ran upstairs and into the dispatcher's office. "What the hell just happened?"

The dispatcher was furiously calling the squad cars as the phones began ringing. "A tornado, and, from the sounds of it, a big one."

Bella watched as he typed the details of the calls into the system for all the officers to read. "Where did it hit?"

"Just a few blocks down the street, behind the post office. It hit a row of houses, and it's bad. Bella! What are you doing?"

"I'm going down there to see if I can help." Bella pulled the first aid kit down off the wall and spun towards the door.

"Wait!"

Bella turned and gave him a look that let him know she wasn't staying. "What?"

He stood up and grabbed something from a box on the wall where the first aid kit had been, handing it to her. "Gloves...in case there's blood."

Bella ignored the turn of her stomach and grabbed the gloves, shoving them into her pocket. She ran out the doors and towards the post office. Everything was eerily quiet, except for the sound of approaching sirens. A slight rain was still falling, but the rear of the storm line was quickly approaching, bringing with it the last of the day's sunlight.

She didn't have to guess where the tornado had hit. She could see the mangled trees and utility poles lining the path. People were milling around the street, inspecting the damage to their homes. The first two homes were missing parts of their roofs, and downed trees littered the yards.

It wasn't until she rounded the corner that Bella could see it. Unstable piles of wood were where homes had stood only minutes earlier. Cars were overturned and twisted around trees. Power lines, humming and crackling, were snapped from poles and lying in the street. People were crying. Bella ran toward a shouting woman.

"Oh my God, oh my God!" Tears were streaming down the woman's dirty face, and neighbors joined Bella at her side.

One man gently grabbed the woman's shoulder and shook her. "Mary, are you okay? You hurt?"

She began sobbing. "It's Thomas! I can't find him! I think he's still in the house!"

The neighbors began running toward the rubble, and Bella followed until she heard someone screaming her name. She turned to see Glenn running from his squad car.

"Bella! What's going on?"

She motioned him toward her as she ran to join the search. "Someone's still in the house; help us look!"

She barely finished her sentence before Glenn ran past her. She took the gloves out of her pocket and pulled them over her hands. Running, she took her first step into the rubble, stepping over the wall of the home's foundation. Her foot sunk into water, and it didn't reach the bottom until the water was almost to her knee. It was cold, and the sensation shocked her. Glenn, flashlight in hand and searching a few feet away, pulled her up and onto a pile of wood.

"Walk slowly and carefully, and be sure to keep calling his name. If he's conscious, he'll answer."

The searchers fanned out over and around the site, and each person began scouring their immediate area. The larger men pulled off large planks of wood and broken furniture, throwing everything to the side. Everyone else looked inside holes and crevices, hoping to hear a voice or movement. All the while, everyone stepped gingerly, not knowing whether the missing person was underfoot.

Bella looked up, and, scanning the faces of the searchers, she found Glenn. Even though he continued to move debris and call out Thomas' name, a look of pained resignation was on his face. She bowed her head, unable to watch him lose hope.

As she bent over and began the search again, she noticed a hand, small and bloody, sticking out between a plank and a piece of drywall.

_Oh, God, they didn't tell me he was a little boy. Please God..._

She called his name softly. "Thomas."

The tiny hand moved, and a muffled moan was barely audible over the sounds of the search. Bella knelt down, and she could see the little boy's arm jutting out from under the drywall. She lifted the drywall, and there he was, his leg at an odd angle and pinned under another large plank. She reached down and wrapped her gloved fingers around his little hand.

"It's okay, sweetie. We found you."

As soon as Bella yelled for help, Glenn and another man were at her side, pulling scraps of house off of the scared child. She continued to hold his hand until he was freed and lifted onto the stretcher by the paramedics. For several minutes, she stood still, watching as Thomas and his mother were loaded into a waiting ambulance. When they drove away, Bella finally began to climb down from the destroyed house.

A hand reached out to help steady her, and she took it. Once she was on solid ground, she looked up at her aide to see Charlie's concerned, loving eyes staring down at her. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and they walked silently to the police station.

***

The breeze was cool, and the smell of rain was still in the air. Out of her wet clothes and into her comfortable sweats, Bella sat on the balcony watching the trees sway. The movement was soothing, and watching it helped quiet her mind.

Charlie appeared in the doorway, a mug of hot tea in his hand. "I just got a call from Glenn. The boy's leg was broken in two places, and he's got two broken ribs. They airlifted him to the children's hospital in Huntsville."

"Will he be okay?"

"A few days in the hospital and a couple of months in a cast and he'll be good as new." Charlie tapped Bella on the shoulder and handed her the mug. "Here, this will help."

She took a big swig of tea and swallowed slowly, feeling it warm her all the way down into her stomach. "Oh, that's good. Since when do you make tea?"

"Since when do you go climbing into collapsed houses?"

_I'm so not ready to have this conversation right now._

"I just wanted to help. I didn't think..."

Charlie's gaze fell to his feet. "You didn't think about what would happen when you found him. What if he'd been dead? That's a hard image to get out of your head."

Bella reached out and clasped Charlie's hand; she hurt for him, thinking about the images forever trapped in his memory. "I know, Dad, but he wasn't."

"Well, thank God for that. Just, next time, let the professionals do their job, and stay out of trouble. Okay, Bells?"

"Okay, Dad."

"Well, try to get some sleep. Tomorrow will be a busy day." He leaned over and kissed the top of her head.

"Night, Dad."

"Goodnight, Bella."

After Charlie left the room, Bella thought about how it felt, rushing towards the fallen house. Her whole body was electrified by the increased adrenaline, and she didn't have to think twice about what she needed to do. It wasn't true that she hadn't thought Thomas might be dead. She just knew that, one way or another, someone needed to find him, and she wanted to help. She was proud of herself for being able to suppress her fear, especially once she found his bloody, broken body.

It wasn't until afterward that she felt queasy and weak. Once Charlie walked her back to the station, she sat for a long time, quiet and contemplative. Glenn and the other officers on the scene stopped to check on her and congratulate her on a job well done. Charlie, however, watched with a worried eye while he continued to to help coordinate recovery efforts with Emergency Management. It was the same way he looked at her after _He_ left.

_Not the same this time. This time I wasn't the one found; I was the one doing the finding._

The adrenaline finally out of her system, Bella yawned and stretched as she walked into the bedroom and locked the balcony doors behind her. She wanted to get some sleep before she talked to Charlie tomorrow. Having made her decision, she figured there was no point in postponing it any longer.

"Oh, I almost forgot..."

Before going to bed, Bella opened a new email message to Angela and began typing.


	4. Things That We Might Have Been

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 4: Things That We Might Have Been**

Charlie was right; the day had been busy. Downtown was not the only area that received storm damage. As the line passed the city limits, a second twister touched down, destroying houses and downing trees on a half mile path. The mayor and the city council asked Charlie to tour the areas with them. Rumor had it that the governor was planning a fact-finding visit as well to declare the county a disaster area.

Luckily, the hospital only reported minor injuries, with Thomas being the only person who had to be airlifted to Huntsville. Glenn's third cousin on his mother's side was somehow related to Thomas's family by marriage, so he was able to keep Bella updated on Thomas's progress. She remembered how hard it was to navigate the world with a broken leg, and she thought about how much more frustrating it would be for an active little boy.

The police station phones rang constantly all morning, and Bella ate a sandwich at her desk instead of going to out for lunch. Early afternoon brought news that power had been restored to most of the city, and officers were wrapping up their damage reports. By 2 P.M., the phones were mostly silent, and the activity inside the station ceased. It was almost like any other afternoon, with Bella at her desk surfing the Internet.

It was however _the_ day, the day Bella was going to tell Charlie she wanted to become a police officer. She'd spent two weeks charting out her intended path and planning a response to any argument that Charlie could put forth. She printed out reams of information, slipping off quietly to the printer every so often as to not attract attention. She knew the physical requirements she'd have to meet and had detailed plans for how she was going to train. She had even applied to the law enforcement program at a local community college and requested her transcript from Forks High. Glenn had helped tremendously, but he begged her not to tell her father.

When Charlie finally returned to the station, he looked exhausted. He smiled weakly when he passed Bella's desk and walked straight to his office. Charlie sunk in his chair and leaned back, closing his eyes slightly. He remained that way for only five minutes, but, when he opened his eyes again, he looked as if he'd had a long nap. Bella was concerned, but she realized quick naps between emergencies was something Charlie had gotten accustomed to long ago.

_I'll have to get used to it, too, I guess._

Bella grabbed the thick stack of paper and headed tentatively toward Charlie's office. When Bella stood at the doorway, Charlie waved her into his office, motioning her to the chair across from him.. "Hey, Bells! Didn't I tell ya' this would be a hellaciously busy day?"

Bella stared at her feet and shuffled the papers in her hand. "You certainly did. How was everything on the tour?"

"It could have been worse. The sirens did their job, and most people seemed to have adequate warning. I would have been back sooner, but one of the houses hit near the city limits had an active meth lab in it. What a mess to clean up."

Meth was a huge problem all over Alabama, and people liked to set up labs in rural areas to avoid police attention. Glenn had explained to Bella the toxic cleanup the houses required. "Hazmat still out there?"

"Yeah, but they should be done pretty soon. At least the idiots weren't cooking it with a kid in the house this time." Charlie noticed the papers in Bella's tight grip. "What's that you got there, Bells?"

She slowly handed him the stack of plans and dreams. "Before you completely freak out, let me explain."

Charlie flipped through the top pages, a copy of the college application. "It's an application for school. That's great Bells! Why would I freak out about..."

She watched as his finger came to rest on the page in approximately the spot where she guessed her major would be listed. When Charlie's jaw tightened and his finger began furiously jabbing the paper, she knew she was right.

"What the holy hell is this? Have you lost your fu...damn mind?"

_So much for him not yelling at me because we're at work._

"Dad, please let me explain."

"There's nothing to explain; I'm not letting you do this!"

Bella felt the heat spread across her face as the anger and tension spread throughout her body. "What do you mean you won't _let_ me? I'm old enough to do it without your permission."

Charlie took a deep breath and spoke again, quietly and more composed. "I know you're still upset about him, Bells, but that's no reason to be self-destructive."

She sat staring at him with her mouth hanging open for several seconds, and she had to concentrate to keep her voice from shaking when she talked. "This has nothing to do with _Him_. Give me a _little fucking credit_, will you?"

"Um...well...okay. Explain it to me, then."

_What was it I was going to say again? Think, Bella, think._

"Dad, I know I was never one of those kids that grew up always knowing they wanted to be a cop, but I didn't really ever think that I'd be _anything_. Other than being with...well, you know what I mean...I never thought I had a real goal in life. Then I come here, and I'm surrounded by all these people who have a sense of purpose, something outside of themselves that they really care about."

Charlie broke the work rule and leaned across the desk to hold her hand. When he opened his mouth to interrupt her, she held up her hand to stop him. "I want to help people, protect them. And, when I can't, I want to make sure the ones who hurt them don't hurt anyone else. And this is how I think I'm supposed to do that. I know this all sounds incredibly corny, but I finally understand why you do what you do, Dad."

"I just don't want you to get hurt. This is a dangerous thing we do, and I'm not sure I could survive if anything happened to you."

"I've lived with that fear for you all my life, you know? But I know it's important to you, so I support you."

Charlie seemed thoroughly taken aback, and his eyes were soft and moist. Taking another deep breath, he attempted to smile. "I guess you have a point there; you always have a point. Where did you get all this stuff?" he asked, flipping through more sheets of paper.

"I found most of it on the Internet, and I had a little help."

The instant the words left her mouth, Bella knew they were a mistake.

"A little help, huh? Just let me take a wild guess who that little help was."

Charlie was looking over her head and through the office door. She finally turned to follow his gaze, and there stood Glenn, frozen and wide-eyed. She mouthed _I'm so sorry_ before turning back to face Charlie.

Charlie crooked his index finger and slowly motioned for Glenn to come to them. "So," he said, his voice oozing hostile sarcasm, "I understand _someone_ has been helping my daughter research how to become a police officer. That wouldn't be you, Officer Glenn, now would it?"

"Um, yes, Sir, I kinda did, Sir." Glenn winced, making Bella feel even worse for her slip of the tongue.

"Well, since you don't have kids, let me ask you this: would you let your _sister_ be a police officer?"

"Actually, Sir, my sister is on the force down in Birmingham."

Bella giggled. Little did Charlie know, Bella had exchanged several long emails with Glenn's sister, who was more than happy to mentor a young woman wanting to become a cop. She found out all she could about what it would be like to be a _woman_ on the job, because she knew that would be Charlie's primary argument against it.

Charlie looked over at Bella suspiciously. "You knew that already, didn't you?"

"Of course I did," she said, laughing.

Charlie sighed, and Bella recognized the unmistakable sound of surrender. "Okay, let's all just sit down and discuss this, and we'll see where we'll go from here."

With a wide, toothy smile and bright eyes, Bella looked at him and took the stack of papers. "I knew you'd see it my way."

"I haven't agreed to anything yet."

Bella chuckled. "Yeah, sure you haven't."

The three of them, Charlie, Bella, and Glenn, sat and went over the information Bella spent weeks gathering. Charlie was impressed with her thoughtful planning and determination, and, eventually, she won him over, albeit reluctantly. He decided, though, that it was still all Glenn's fault, and, being the instigator, Glenn would need to make sure Bella trained for the physical requirements. However, Charlie didn't trust anyone other than himself to teach her how to shoot. Since she'd have two years of community college before she'd be old enough to go to the police academy, he said he'd have plenty of time to work with her.

"First shooting lesson is tomorrow, Bells. God-awful o'clock, too, to get to the range while no one else is there."

Bella hadn't expected Charlie to jump into the deep end with her so quickly, but she was excited to begin. "Thanks, Dad!"

As she stood and began walking back to her desk, Charlie's voice stopped her. "Oh, and Bells?"

"Yeah, Dad?"

"I better not hear you say that word again."

***

Dark and creepy: the best words to describe the firing range at 6 A.M. The range was private, and members had keys and could go any time they wanted. The owner gave Guntersville police officers free memberships, and Charlie was a regular. Bella had never been to this or any other range, and, when Charlie flipped on the lights, she examined the room closely.

The room itself was almost cavernous, with cold concrete floors and walls. Everything in the room was painted black. The front of the room was lined with a row of booths, each open toward the far wall and containing a counter, lights, small round stickers, and a toggle switch. When Charlie toggled the switch up, the suspended target moved along a wire towards them.

Charlie replaced the bulls-eye target with one showing the outline of a human. "We're not shooting for accuracy today. I just want you to know how to shoot a gun in general. We can't use my service weapon, but I have my own 9mm that I think will be perfect for you."

He placed the gun case and a box of practice ammo on the booth's counter. He turned to begin his lecture but stopped to point and laugh at the ear muffs Bella was wearing. "So that's what you pulled from the barrel?"

When Charlie told her to grab a pair from the range's community supply, the pink color had called out to her. Since she was never a girly girl, she wasn't sure why. Embarrassed, Bella touched the pink cup covering her ear. "I liked them, and they looked a little lonely out there."

"Hey, whatever keeps you from going deaf."

Charlie turned back to the pistol and began demonstrating safe handling and loading the gun. When she tried to load it herself, Bella's fingers stung from having to push so hard to get the bullets to go into the clip, and Charlie assured her it would get easier. Once the gun was loaded, Charlie lifted the gun, pointing it downrange with his right hand, wrapped around the grip, resting in his left palm and his trigger finger extended down the side of the barrel.

"See this, Bells? You don't put your finger on the trigger until you're absolutely ready to shoot."

Just then, Charlie moved his finger and squeezed the trigger once. Bella flinched at the loud, echoing bang, and the smell of the expelled gunpowder reminded her of burnt matches. She heard the ting of something metallic hitting the floor, and, when she bent over to pick up the shell casing, it was still hot to the touch. She stood back up to see that Charlie's shot had placed a hole in center of the target's chest.

Charlie put the gun, barrel pointing downrange, down on the counter and looked at her solemnly. "Okay, before I let you do this, there is one thing you must keep in mind. If you point a gun at another human being, you must be prepared to kill that person. It's not nice to say or pleasant to think, but that's what it is. If you think you can kneecap them like a Wild West movie, you'll likely end up the one shot dead. Understand?"

Seeing the sorrow in his eyes, Bella somehow knew what he'd been trying to tell her all along. It wasn't the demanding work or the possibility of his own death that was hardest for Charlie. After all, no one thinks they'll ever really die. The hardest thing was knowing that, some day, you might have to take another person's life, put an end to all the things they might have been if they'd had the chance. She wanted to ask him if he'd ever had to kill anyone, but she didn't have the courage.

"Yes," he said quietly, as if he could read her eyes as well. "Once. And I hope it's not something you ever have to live with. But, if you go through with this..."

Bella laid her hand softly on Charlie's shoulder. "I'm ready, Dad. Show me."

Charlie toggled the target towards them again and placed a small, white sticker over his previous shot. "This way we won't get confused about which shot is yours."

"Yeah, like that was gonna happen."

In a flurry of instructions and activity, Charlie readied Bella for her first shot. The target was sent back, but this time it was a bit closer to the booth. Charlie fidgeted while Bella picked up the gun, and he was obviously nervous as he helped her position it in her hands. "Try not to anticipate it or close your eyes. Squeeze the trigger gently, or you'll pull your barrel up and shoot at an angle. Oh, hell, just do it already."

Bella held her breath to steady her hands and pulled. She didn't flinch so much this time, but she was surprised at the strength of the recoil as it traveled down her arms into her chest. It was scary but exciting at the same time. The shell casing flew back and hit her on top of the head, slightly burning her scalp as it bounced away. She lowered the gun and looked at the target.

"Wait, there's no hole. What happened?"

Charlie guffawed. "You didn't hit it. But don't worry. You will...eventually."

"Again," Bella said, aiming for the target's chest.

She continued firing until the practice rounds were gone. By the last clip, she was able to consistently hit inside the target, although she decided her best shots were dumb luck. As Charlie packed everything up and Bella swept the shell casings off the floor, she noticed the smell of burnt gunpowder on her clothes, on her hands, and in her hair. The smell made it all seem real to her, and she was ready to get started.

***

In all her months in Guntersville, the only thing that made Bella miss Forks was the oppressively hot summer in Alabama. Glenn was a dictatorial taskmaster, pushing her to train no matter the weather or the temperature. She began to wonder if he had been a drill instructor in a former life; he certainly was a pain in the ass in this one. She had pulled and rebuilt muscles she never knew she had, and she only stopped whining when she began to notice how the training seemed to result in her being a lot less clumsy.

Over the summer, Charlie had moved from begrudgingly accepting Bella's decision to admiring it. Although she had every intention of going ahead with her plans without his approval, having his blessing made her happier than she'd been since leaving Forks. Compared to Charlie, Renee had been easy, although she couldn't understand why Bella didn't want to move to Jacksonville, which had a much larger police force. Renee promised a visit before Bella started school, but, when Phil broke his leg falling off a ladder while moving some tree limbs off their roof, she had to cancel.

School seemed like a distant memory; it'd been almost a year since Bella stopped going to classes at Forks High. Leaving for her first day at community college, she nervously climbed into the truck, Charlie waving at her from the front door of the police station. She planned to work there days and attend classes in the afternoon and at night. The school was an hour away, and Charlie insisted on getting her a newer truck that would go faster than 50 MPH and was less likely to break down every 10 miles. While she missed driving her antique, she had to admit, if only to herself, that Charlie was right.

The drive gave her lots of time to think, and, although certain subjects were off limits, she spent much of the time the first day thinking about how much had changed since she arrived in Alabama. It was still all very surreal, as if she were living in an alternate Bella universe. Still, she was really here, really driving down the highway, and really starting to live the plans she'd carefully crafted sitting at her desk at the station. This has been exactly what she'd hoped for the night she asked Charlie to leave Forks: a new adventure to replace the old one.

When she pulled into the parking space at the college, it was nothing like her first day at Forks High. Her pickup truck was just one of many in the lot, and no one stared at her as if they were making first contact with an alien life form. She wasn't self-conscious; she didn't trip or drop her books or do anything equally embarrassing. As she pushed through the building's glass doors, she was just another student trying to get through the first day of classes, and that was just how she liked it.


	5. How It Should Be

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 5: How It Should Be**

The face staring back at her from the full-length mirror looked familiar, she thought. Still, the strange woman was different than she remembered. Her hair, a warm chestnut color, had slight amber highlights from the sun, and it gently curled at the ends, which barely brushed her shoulders. The eyes were the same deep brown, but they seemed older, wiser. Her body was fuller, rounder, and probably even softer to the touch.

_Not that anyone's touched me in forever._

Bella laughed, taking a good, long look. Everything was in it's place, shiny and starched where it should be shiny or starched. She raised the cap and placed on her head, making sure it was perfectly straight.

"Who the hell are you, and what have you done with my daughter?"

Charlie whistled as he walked into Bella's room and stood next to her in front of the mirror. He was wearing his dress uniform, and she thought he looked as handsome as she'd ever seen him. She noticed the strands of gray throughout his hair and decided it made him look more distinguished.

"Well, you don't look so bad yourself, Dad. You'll be a hit with the ladies. But you really didn't have to break out the good clothes."

"Of course, I did! It's not every day your child graduates from the police academy."

When Bella first walked into Charlie's office with her stack of papers, the plan seemed out of reach and insurmountable. She'd worked hard, both in school and the academy, because she wanted it more than anything. She was three years removed from Forks, doing something that had never occurred to her before she left that life behind. And she was happier than she'd ever been.

"Is Jackson going to be able to make it? I haven't talked to him today."

"Yep, he was able to get another detective to swap shifts with him today. I think he had to promise Wynn tickets to a Bama game, though."

Bella grabbed Charlie and pulled him towards her for a hug. "It'll be great having the two of you there."

"Yeah, about that..."

"Dad," Bella wearily sighed into his chest, "tell me they aren't. It will be mortifying."

"Not everyone."

"How many?"

"Well, we had to leave a few to cover the shift," Charlie mumbled.

Practically everyone in the Guntersville Police Department had threatened, at one time or another, to come to Bella's graduation. While their promises made her feel loved, she found the actual prospect of thirty or so of Guntersville's finest taking over the HPD graduation slightly embarrassing.

When it was time to apply to an academy, Charlie had suggested the one run by the Huntsville Police Department. He'd become friendly with Huntsville's police chief, and he thought working in a much bigger city would be good experience for Bella. After three years on the force there, she could apply for a lateral transfer to a larger department somewhere like Birmingham. Bella knew, though, that Charlie hoped she would someday come home to the Guntersville department.

Charlie wrapped his arm around her waist and squeezed her tightly. "Renee would be so proud of you."

Any thought of Renee made Bella sigh, and she did so more bitterly today. The accident had been a little more than a year earlier, and she remembered in excruciating detail every millisecond between the 2 A.M. phone call and the funeral four days later. Renee and Phil were leaving one of his games, and a fan, who'd celebrated the win too vigorously, crossed the median and slammed into their small car. Renee was killed instantly, and Phil's right leg was shattered. He would never play baseball again.

Even though she had rarely seen Renee since moving to Forks, Bella was keenly aware of her absence. It was months before the urge to call or email her every night stopped. Bella sobbed for a hour before her community college graduation when she realized it was her first major milestone without her mother. Although it had eventually scarred over, the hole in her heart from her mother's death would never heal. It made her realize how stupid she'd been when he'd left. While his leaving hurt, it was nothing compared to the pain of knowing she'd never see Renee again.

She didn't want to cry today. "Thanks, Dad. She would have hated the uniform, though."

Charlie cleared his throat. "Yeah, she would have. Not enough color, I guess." He looked at his watch and pulled away, taking another look at Bella in her uniform. "Well, Bells, time to go make us proud."

She looked in the mirror one last time before she ran down the stairs after Charlie.

Graduation was a sea of blue, and Bella was surprised at how happy all the friendly faces from home made her. Even though it had been years since she worried about tripping over her feet, she still gingerly walked across the stage to receive her badge. Charlie's wide smile beamed from the audience and never left his face the entire afternoon. The only time it changed was to grow even larger when he heard Bella's name called for the class marksmanship award, which she knew she owed all to his early morning lessons.

Afterward, dutifully shaking hands and posing for pictures, Bella looked thoughtfully around the room at her father, her friends, and her new colleagues. Forks and the girl she'd been there seemed like a lifetime ago. Some days she wondered if that person, that life had been one of her fanciful dreams and this was the existence she'd always led. It was here that she felt a sense of belonging that had evaded her for her entire life.

She remembered thinking she'd found that with the Cullens, but his leaving had proved her wrong. Thinking of him didn't hurt quite as much now, but she didn't like to do it. It left her with a longing that would take days to dissipate, and today, of all days, was not one she wanted to spend wasting energy on something so useless. Still, she couldn't help but wonder if they'd be proud of her, too.

"Bells, where'd you go off to?" Charlie asked, looking as if he knew.

Bella shook her head and smiled. "Oh, nowhere. Just thinking about that great dinner you owe me."

Charlie offered her his bent arm. "Well, let's go then. Glenn and his wife are probably already there waiting for us."

Bella threaded her arm through his and laughed, her thoughts once again completely in the present.

***

The restaurant was the nicest in Huntsville, and seeing the white tablecloths and large, plush chairs made Bella feel a little guilty about the amount of money Charlie was going spend. Charlie insisted, though, and she graciously accepted. Although he'd originally thought her friendship with Glenn was a bad idea, Charlie had long accepted Glenn and his wife as extended family, and inviting them to come with them had been a given. Bella thought it was funny that, no matter how much time they'd spent together, Charlie still couldn't seem to call Glenn by his first name, and Glenn still addressed Charlie as "Sir."

Although it had not been quite so grand, they'd also celebrated when Glenn became a detective that Spring. At first, Glenn looked like a overwhelmed little boy in his suit with his soft, freckled face and spiky, red hair. Bella watched him across the table, amazed at how a couple of successful cases had brought him back to the confident, friendly person he'd been as a beat cop. She hoped that, after a few weeks of patrol training, she'd feel as self-assured as he seemed.

"So, Bella, how long will you be partnered up before they give you your own squad car?" Glenn asked, raising another bite of key lime pie to his mouth.

"Twelve weeks, starting tomorrow."

Charlie stabbed his chocolate cake with his fork, causing it to clang loudly in impact with the plate. "Yeah, well, I wish it wasn't the night shift. Night shifts are a bitch...and dangerous."

"I know, but I figured better me than all the guys that had kids at home. Plus, volunteering for it scored me brownie points with my new boss. He won't be as easy to work for as you were." Bella winked across the table at Charlie, who tried not to smile.

"She's right, Sir."

"Are you trying to say I'm easy to work for, Glenn? I could fix that, you know." Charlie pointed menacingly at Glenn, but he couldn't keep the smile out of his gruff voice.

Glenn stuttered, almost spitting coffee all over the table. "No, that's not what I meant, Sir. I was just..."

"Baby, he's just teasing you." Glenn's wife patted his hand, reassuring him. She winked at Bella and slowly shook her head as if to say, "He's _so_ easy."

Glenn and his wife were a study in opposites. He was a tall and brawny, while she was slight and soft. He was athletic and outgoing; she was an introverted homebody. While he chose a career that put him in contact with people every day, she liked her work as a computer programmer, which kept her isolated most of the time. The only thing they seemed to have in common was that they loved each other desperately. Watching them together, Bella wondered if she'd ever have that kind of relationship with anyone.

Bella waved a chocolate-covered strawberry in Charlie's direction. "Well, if we're giving people a hard time tonight...how many times have you called my future desk sergeant anyway, Dad?"

"I only wanted to find out the crime rates in your precinct."

"Stop it. You're going to give me a reputation as a daddy's girl."

"Aren't you?" Glenn asked, flinching in anticipation.

Bella stuck her tongue out at him. "Shut up!"

"Okay, kids, don't make me send you to the car," Glenn's wife chided, winking at Bella again before returning to her tiramisu.

After the waiter cleared the desert dishes, Charlie plopped down a stack of envelopes in front of Bella. They were each addressed with her name. "Oh, by the way, I wanted to give you these."

Bella shuffled through the stack. "What's this?"

"I collected some happy graduation cards for you."

Bella tore into the envelopes, reading each card and proudly showing it off to everyone at the table. There were many cards from the officers in Guntersville, including a beautiful one from Glenn and his wife. Interspersed with these, Bella found several she hadn't expected.

Thomas, the boy she'd found the night of the tornado, always sent her cards on her birthday and Christmas, and he'd sent a sweet one today. Bella was surprised to see a card from Billy and Jacob, and, when she saw the third signature, she realized Jacob's girlfriend had made sure it was sent. She couldn't help laughing when she wondered how they were adjusting to the female touch after so many years on their own. Angela and Ben's card was sealed with a monogram sticker left over from their wedding thank you notes. Bella hadn't gone to the wedding because it was too close to the start of academy; she hadn't really looked forward to returning to Forks, anyway. The last card was from Phil, who wrote a touching note telling Bella how proud he was of her.

Still, no matter how much she didn't want it to be so, she couldn't help wishing there had been two more cards on the pile.

_Geez, Bella, could you be any more sappy today? Don't you dare cry..._

Bella jumped out of her seat and ran over to Charlie, almost knocking him down as she embraced him tightly. "Dad, thank you so much! These are the nicest cards ever." She sniffled, trying to stop the tears running down her cheeks.

"Bells, sweetheart, you're welcome," Charlie whispered, kissing her softly on top of her head. "Don't cry, it's okay."

Regaining her composure, Bella sat down and gathered the cards together, pressing them to her chest. "Well, I appreciate them all, more than you know."

Finally, it was time for the long drive back to Guntersville. Bella gave Glenn and his wife strong, appreciative hugs, and she sank into the passenger seat of Charlie's cruiser. They traveled silently, Charlie reaching over every so often to pat her hand. As stressful as tomorrow would be for her, Bella knew that it was the first day of an all-new kind of stress for Charlie, too.

She was sitting on her balcony, enjoying the breeze and rereading her cards, when she heard Charlie walk up behind her.

"Why do I always seem to find you out here?" he said, handing her a cup of tea.

"It's relaxing, just watching the trees sway and listening to the crickets chirp. I think it's my favorite part of the entire house. You should sit out here yourself sometime."

Taking the invitation, Charlie sat down on the balcony floor facing her. "Are you ready for tomorrow?"

"As ready as I'm ever going to be, I reckon."

Charlie looked at her wide-eyed then began bellowing a laugh that echoed through the trees. "Did you just say you _reckon_?"

"Yeah, I guess I did." She felt the hot prickling blush spread across her cheeks. "I don't know where I picked that up."

_Sure I do; that damn Jackson says it all the time._

"Well, I _reckon_ you ought to try to get some sleep. You'll need the extra rest until you get used to nights."

Charlie stood up and began to walk away, but Bella shouted a question behind him. "Hey, Dad, did I hear the phone ring earlier? Who was it?"

"Just some PI from California," Charlie answered. "He's working a case and wants to meet with me Monday morning. Now get some sleep," he said, walking down the hallway.

Bella propped her feet up on the balcony railing and leaned back, drinking her tea. "PI from California? How odd."

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**_A/N: For those worried about knowing enough _Moonlight _to follow the crossover, the next chapter will be like a Moonlight 101, everything you ever wanted to know about _Moonlight _but were afraid to ask._**


	6. Hold Me When I'm Here

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: This chapter is rated M for lemon. Also, a playlist of songs for each chapter is posted in my profile.**

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**Chapter 6: Hold Me When I'm Here**

He never got tired of watching her sleep. This time, she was lying face down, her silken blond hair cascading softly over her bare shoulders and back. He ran his fingers deliberately down her spine, stopping at the small of her back to turn and trace back again. Slowly, he leaned down, burying his face in her hair and breathing deeply. He wanted to remember her scent and the scent of them together while he was gone.

When he was turned so many years ago, he never thought he would be able to have this, a loving and physical relationship with another being, much less the beautiful human he'd claimed as his. Resenting being turned into a monster against his will, he worried no one would ever be able to look at him with anything other than fear. But, when she looked at him, she looked at him with love.

"Mick," she whispered with a sigh.

_There she goes, talking in her sleep again._

Mick leaned back against the headboard. He was exhausted, but he didn't dare go to sleep and miss his last night with Beth before leaving for Alabama. He could be gone for weeks, and he wanted this to remember until he was home again.

Beth was worried about his trip, but he reassured her that there was a support system for him in Alabama. He laughed when she seemed shocked that there were vampires even in the Deep South. He'd made sure to drink lots of blood on a regular schedule for the last several days. They had sunlight in L.A., but he was somewhat shielded from the constant layer of smog over the city. Alabama, however, didn't offer such protection; the sun was strong and steady. He wouldn't have to be outside in it long before he'd begin to feel weak.

Retail blood would be much easier to find than he'd anticipated. Guillermo, his source in L.A., had connections everywhere it seemed, and he gave him the name of a vampire working in the morgue in Huntsville. And, if that source ran dry, there was always Nashville or Birmingham. He wouldn't be able to carry any on the plane; TSA searches tended to turn up things like IV bags full of human blood. However, he had to drive through Huntsville to get to his destination, and he'd pick up a few thousand CCs there.

Josef helped Mick convince Beth that the trip was safe. The oldest vampire in L.A., Josef had lived or visited practically everywhere. He hadn't been to Alabama since the early 1900s, but he said one thing was always true about the South. Southerners wanted to think the best of everyone, and they'd shrug off and explain away things that someone in L.A. would call bullshit on in a second. He called it the "Bless his heart" syndrome. "You know, like, 'Bless his heart, he's got the biggest fangs I've ever seen.'"

The last time Mick had been in the South was a trip to New Orleans with Coraline. She was still pretending to be human, and he hadn't proposed to her yet. It was still painful, remembering how she'd betrayed him, turning him on their wedding night. Then, years later, to keep him, she'd kidnapped a small child, intending to turn her and make them some kind of sick vampire family. He'd saved the child and burned their house down around Coraline.

So many years later, he continued to watch that child, now a woman, sleeping and sighing his name.

He'd watched from afar as she grew, became a journalist, and fell in love with a human man. It was her job as a journalist for a sleazy website that had finally brought them together. She was working a story about a murderer who posed as a vampire, and he made sure she was safe while keeping her in the dark about the vampire underworld. Another story caused her to cross his path again, and, when he was injured while protecting her from a psychopathic killer, she found out what he was. A vampire, a monster.

He remembered the relief he felt when she knocked on his door again, interrogating him about his life as a vampire. She knew what he was, and she hadn't run away. She'd even once saved him by offering her blood to him. He closed his eyes, remembering how sweet and warm it had been in his mouth. When he kissed her, her lips had the same sweet taste, so he kissed her often and deeply.

He also thought about the times he'd almost lost her, once when her boyfriend was killed and Mick refused to change him and another when Coraline tried to win him back. The pull to his sire, a woman he'd once loved more than anything, was strong, but, in the end, Beth's pull was stronger. He never wanted to face losing her again. He wondered if that would eventually mean watching her die. She hadn't asked him to turn her, but he feared she someday would. And he feared what she'd do when he told her no.

_That's enough emo for today._

Mick leaned over, brushing Beth's hair away from the nape of her neck. He placed a soft, warm kiss there, feeling her shudder underneath him. "Are you awake?"

"Um, I am now. What a nice way to wake up."

When she put her hands underneath her and began to push herself up off the bed, Mick gently pushed her back down, pulling her body into his and spooning her fully. "Now, you don't _really_ want to get up, do you?" he whispered into her neck.

She began to answer, but her words turned into sighs before they ever left her mouth as Mick reached around her to cup her breasts in his warm hands. He returned to her neck, kissing, nibbling, and licking, as he kneaded her, making sure to brush his thumbs every so often across her raised, sensitive nipples.

When he held her like this, he thought about how her body seemed to be built just to fit his. Unlike the emaciated starlet wannabes that overran the city, Beth was beautifully soft and rounded in all the right places. Her porcelain skin glowed, even more so now as he ran his hands up and down her sides and over her stomach. He could stare into her crystal blue eyes forever, and her full lips were a perfect home for his always hungry mouth.

She threw her head back onto his shoulder moaning. "Why do you always tease me like this?"

He laughed, slightly grazing her thighs with his hand. "I don't _mean_ to tease."

"The hell you don't." She reached up and pulled his face towards him by the hair she had enclosed in her fist. The instant their lips touched, they parted them, plunging greedy tongues into each other's mouths.

_Oh, there it is, that sweet taste._

Mick groaned into Beth's mouth as he felt her begin to slowly sway her hips, rubbing her ass suggestively across his hard length. He pulled away from their kiss, running his tongue along the side of her neck until his lips brushed against her ear. "Always so impatient."

Grasping his hand, she began to move it downward over her stomach. "Not all of us have eternity to wait."

He winced, feeling the pain of knowing the woman under his hands would someday be gone. The pain was forgotten, however, once he felt her wet heat. Slowly, he teased her, slipping his fingers easily inside her. She quietly moaned as he thrust into her, rubbing her clit in gentle circles with his thumb.

Her whole body flushed a sheer pink, and her breathing became ragged. He knew she was quickly reaching her peak, so he began moving harder and faster. Suddenly, she tightly clenched his hand, stopping his firm strokes.

"Not without you, Mick. Please," she pleaded breathlessly.

They'd made love all night, sometimes rough and frenzied, and he had wanted to gently and simply give her pleasure. "Beth..."

She turned her head to face him again, whispering "please" once more against his lips before kissing him hard. He sighed, because she always knew how to make him do what she wanted.

He buried his face in the crook of her neck, gently nibbling there as he slowly entered her. His movement was very deliberate, drawing out the first thrust for as long as possible. Once fully inside, he paused, letting them both relish the sensation of completeness, and wrapped his arms tightly around her trembling body.

Then it began, the precarious balancing act that was their lovemaking. Mick loved Beth deeply and in every way possible, but, sometimes, the monster tried to surface. It reminded him that he could drink from her without killing her, that her blood was the sweetest thing he'd ever tasted, that he could utterly overpower and dominate her. But Mick didn't want their intimacy to be just another time to feed, and he had to push down the monster, keeping it subdued.

He sighed gratefully when the monster remained dormant this time.

Beth arched her back into him, reaching her hand behind her to stroke his wavy, russet hair. Mick knew that signal like he knew every inch of her body, and he withdrew from her, only to plunge deeper into her with his next thrust. He loosened his grip around her waist and moved his hands to her hips, grasping tightly. Each successive thrust was harder and faster than the last, until gentleness was forgotten and they were crashing together.

Her hands were almost flailing as she struggled to reach him behind her. He laughed; he loved taking her this way because, eventually, she would have to surrender and just feel what was happening. When she did, she threw her head back against his shoulder, gasping loudly each time their bodies came together. He could see her soft lips part as she began to chant his name. Although he wouldn't have thought it possible, his pulse quickened even more at the sound of his name breathlessly echoing throughout the room.

Taking her earlobe into his mouth, he bit down. He could feel the familiar tug of his fangs struggling to extend despite his restraint, and he knew it was time. His voice was raspy as he whispered. "Come on, baby. You know what I want you to do."

As Mick watched, Beth inched her hand lower, eventually moving her fingers in small, determined circles as she pleasured herself. Each time she sped up, he thrust inside her faster. Each time she hardened her touch, he took her with more force. Finally, he felt her entire body tense, and she screamed his name one last time as she began to pulse and spasm around him. It was what he needed, what he always needed, and he exploded inside her, allowing himself to temporarily relinquish control and just love her.

And it was over. He held her, tenderly kissing her cheek, as he returned to his constant battle with the monster.

***

"Beth, have you seen my sunglasses?" Mick yelled up the stairs. He only had a couple of hours before his plane left, and he needed to get to the airport soon. However, he'd definitely need those sunglasses in Alabama.

Beth walked downstairs, twirling the glasses on her index finger. "What are you willing to give me for them?"

Laughing, he pulled her closely into his chest. "How 'bout a night of hot, reckless sex when I get home?"

"I'll get that anyway." She slipped the sunglasses on his head and pulled away. "I really don't think this trip is a good idea."

He sighed, not wanting to have this argument again. Just as Beth's mother had years earlier, Annie's mother came to him, distraught and begging him to help find her missing child. Annie, fifteen going on twenty-five, had met a man online and disappeared with him several weeks ago. The police had run out of leads, sending out an Amber alert and hoping for some news from another jurisdiction. Her mother was desperate, and Mick had never been one to turn his back on a woman or child who needed his help. If anyone should have understood that, Beth should.

"You know why I have to go. He's headed there. It's the center of his entire meth operation."

She rolled her eyes, and he could see her start to tense in frustration. "That's _exactly_ why this is a bad idea. Let the police in Alabama take care of this."

"I'm going to work with the police chief there. It will all be okay, and I'll bring her home." He gently cupped the side of her face with his hand, hoping she wouldn't let him leave with this as their last conversation.

"I know why this is important to you, Mick, really I do. But I don't like the idea of you being so far away."

Once they'd confessed their feelings to each other, they hadn't been apart for more than a few hours. L.A. contained enough sin and mayhem to keep him in business for eternity, and he rarely had to leave the city limits. Once he took a case, however, he did whatever it took to reach a resolution. And this case was taking him to Alabama.

"It's okay. We're never far apart as long as there's cell coverage." He kissed her nose when she reluctantly giggled. "Josef will keep an eye on things here for me."

"You mean me."

"Yes, I mean you." Josef didn't completely approve of Mick's relationship with Beth, but he would protect her with his existence in Mick's absence.

She kissed him, and he could feel her resignation in the soft pecks. "Just find her and come home to me."

He buried his hand into her soft, flowing hair and pulled her face to his. His lips pressed against hers, opening to deepen the kiss. He wanted her taste on his tongue as long as possible, but he knew it was time to leave. Ending the kiss, he looked into her crystal blue eyes and whispered.

"I love you."

She sighed as if it were the first time she'd heard the words. "I love you, too."

"Take me to the airport, and I'll let you drive my car," Mick said, picking up his carry-on bag. His 1966 Mercedes convertible was his pride and joy.

Beth laughed and grabbed her purse off the entryway table. "Why didn't you tell me that first? Now I can't wait to get rid of you."

He took her hand and led her out the door, happy to at least hear her laugh before flying away.


	7. All She Keeps Inside

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: After reading the chapter, visit my blog for ****a new link button****, ****pictures****, ****a reader's poll**** about chapter length, and an updated playlist.**

**http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/**

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**Chapter 7: All She Keeps Inside**

_Well, it could be worse; it could be Summer._

Even with the sunglasses, Mick squinted as he stepped off the plane in Huntsville. He was grateful that he'd been able to finally sleep during the flight, because he knew the bright sunlight, even this late in the day, would tire him quickly. He picked up his carry-on bag and went to find his car in the lot. He'd scoffed at driving a rental car and had Josef arrange for something more suitable; it was one of the few times he'd used Josef's considerable connections. He was shocked to find, in the space Josef specified, a 2010 Jaguar XKR convertible.

"Josef, really," Mick chided, calling Josef from the parking lot, "don't you think this is a little excessive?"

"Excessive would be a Lamborghini Murcielago. The Jaguar is merely adequate." He sounded genuinely hurt.

"Well, thank you. You really shouldn't have."

"Yes, I know, but I can't have you letting the Alabama vampires think we're trailer trash. We have an image to uphold."

Mick laughed, because there really was no arguing with Josef. The car drove like it was floating on air instead of rolling on asphalt, and Mick quickly retrieved his retail blood supply from the morgue so the car wouldn't be left exposed in the lot too long. He buckled his seat belt for the drive to Guntersville, thankful that being a vampire meant never needing GPS.

The chill of the late October air was soothing, and Mick drove with the car windows down. Had it not been for the sunlight, he would have lowered the top as well. The trees lining the hills along the drive were turning brilliant shades of gold, red, and brown, creating a natural patchwork that extended for miles in every direction. The color of the sky, a pale shade of blue that recalled Beth's expressive eyes, was slowly being slowly transformed to amber by the setting sun. By the time he crossed the bridge into Guntersville, the last rays of sunlight were disappearing over the horizon.

When he arrived at the police station, he parked in the space furthest from the door, taking care to leave plenty of space around his new toy. He saw his reflection in the building's double glass doors, and, realizing he'd left on his sunglasses, he removed them.

_Yeah, sunglasses at night would look out of place. This isn't L.A., after all._

An officer, sitting behind the front desk, greeted Mick in a gruff voice. "Can I help you?"

"Yes, I'm looking for Chief Swan. I'm Mick St. John."

"I'm Chief Swan," Charlie said, extending his hand to shake Mick's "Good to meet you."

Mick shook Charlie's hand firmly and took in a small breath. With the intake, Mick could see Charlie's entire day flash through his mind. He was relieved to see that Charlie seemed like a friendly, straight-forward man, despite the suspicious scowl currently on his face. "Good to meet you, too. Do you have a few minutes to talk?"

"Well, it's the least I can do, considering you came all the way from California." Charlie flashed a brief smile that put Mick even more at ease. "Let's go to my office."

Charlie's office was like most of the offices Mick had seen over the years. A uniform windbreaker was thrown over the guest chair, and the desk was littered with papers and candy bar wrappers. All in all, Mick thought, it wasn't the messiest he'd even seen. Still, Charlie quickly attempted to straighten up things and looked slightly embarrassed.

"You'll have to forgive the mess, St. John. My daughter used to help me keep some order around here, but, since she got another job, the new assistant hasn't been as...um...attentive."

Mick pulled the guest chair to squarely face the desk and eased into the seat. "No problem. You should see my office."

_Which is immaculate, just so you know._

Charlie sat down and leaned back in his chair. "So, what brings you to our fair city?" He chuckled quietly. "I've always wanted to say that."

"Well, Chief, I'm trying to find a missing girl." Mick pulled a picture out of his jacket pocket and slid it across the desk. "Her name's Annie, and she ran away to meet someone she met on the Internet. She thought he was eighteen, but it turns out he's thirty...and a meth distributor. She hasn't been seen in several weeks."

Charlie picked up the picture, and Mick could see Charlie's eyes soften as he scanned the girl's face. "And, let me guess, part of his operation is here."

"Yes. Based on information I _elicited_ from his partners, he's headed this way. If he's not here already."

"You got a name?" Charlie asked as he turned to face his computer.

"Joe Phelps."

Charlie's two index fingers quickly hunted and pecked out the name, and he hit the Enter key authoritatively. "Yep, thought that name sounded familiar. We've picked him up a time or two. Can't seem to get him convicted for anything substantial, though."

Mick leaned toward Charlie and began speaking in sober tones. "I'm not trying to interfere in any police work you're doing here. I just need to find the girl. I'd like the...leeway...to look for her here."

"You know," Charlie said, breathing deeply, "having a daughter myself, I'd do _anything_ to make sure she was safe, that she was alright."

When their eyes met, Mick knew they had an unspoken understanding. "Thank you."

"Hey, Dad, are you going to work all night?"

Mick turned to face the voice behind him, and, standing in the doorway, was a young woman dressed in a midnight blue police uniform. She was petite, but strength emanated from her in waves that surprised him. Her brown hair was pulled back tightly; it would have made her face appear severe if hadn't been for her eyes, which were warm and the color of melted chocolate. She was obviously her father's daughter.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't see that you were busy." She clasped her hand over her mouth, and the gesture made her look like a caught little girl.

"No problem. We were just finishing up. Mick St. John, this is my daughter Bella."

Mick stood, walking towards Bella and extending his hand. "Nice to meet you. You can call me Mick."

"So you're the mysterious private investigator we've been expecting," Bella said jokingly, taking Mick's hand in hers.

As he shook her hand, he glanced down at her wrist and froze. His entire body stiffened for only a second as he processed the sight, and there was no question it was what it appeared to be.

A bite of a Cold One.

Mick's eyes snapped back up to Bella's face, and he breathed deeply. "Yes, that would be me." His voice was calm, never betraying the questions speeding through his mind.

"Well, my father and I are late for dinner with friends, but, I have a day off tomorrow. How 'bout the three of us have lunch and you tell us how we can help."

"There's a great pizza place down the block," Charlie added, as he walked over and gave Bella a quick squeeze around her shoulders. "Do you like like pizza, St. John?"

"Of course, doesn't everyone?"

Bella and Charlie walked toward the double doors of the station, and Mick followed, scrutinizing Bella's every move. He replaced his intense look with a cordial smile as he sensed Bella turning around.

"So is it a date?" She said, smiling.

Mick stopped in his tracks. "How can I turn down such an attractive offer?"

_Especially when I need to figure out what the hell is going on here._

***

The room at the state park lodge was perfect for a vampire. Nestled in the woods next to the lake, the lodge was in constant shade, and the log cabin style rooms blocked out what little sunlight made it through the trees. Even with the Autumn air, Mick cranked up the air conditioning to make the room more like the cooler in which he slept at home. He hoped it would be cold enough; he didn't want to have to fill the tub with ice and sleep there.

Once he was settled, Mick arranged the laptop on the room's desk and pinged Josef for a video chat. He'd expected to wait a while to hear back, but Josef quickly appeared on his screen.

Josef was sitting in his office, the L.A. skyline visible behind him. "Mick, I know you love me, but can you not get through one day away without calling me?"

"Yes, very funny. I have a problem."

"Okay," Josef replied, sounding bored. "Shoot."

"I met the police chief's daughter..."

"Oh, really?" Josef leaned into the camera. "Is she cute? You know, it's been a while since you've had a freshie. Although, I don't think Beth would appreciate it."

"Josef," Mick said, snapping his fingers, "let's focus here. I'm not going feed from her. She has a scar...from a Cold One."

Josef's eyes widened. "Really? I didn't know there were Cold Ones down South. All that sparkling sunshine and everything."

"She's not a Cold One. She's human."

"Are you sure it's what you think it is?"

Mick had no doubts. "The scar is unmistakable, you know that. It's that shimmering white tissue, in the perfect outline of teeth. I could just feel the coolness coming off it. But I shook her hand, and she's warm and has a pulse."

"How incredibly odd. I didn't think a human could survive a Cold One bite without changing...you know, the venom and all."

"Exactly. I even tried to see her past, but it was all blurry. Like it was a long time ago and she was trying to forget it."

Josef leaned back in his seat with a knowing look on his face. "Well, besides the obvious trivia factor, why do you care?"

Mick paused, wondering about it himself for a few seconds. "I don't know. I just have to find out this girl's story."

"Mick, she's not why you're there. The Cold Ones stay out of our way. You should stay out of theirs." Josef sighed. "But we both know you're not going to do that, don't we?"

"Of course not."

"All I can tell you is not to get killed."

Mick laughed. "Josef, I didn't know you cared."

"I don't, but I don't want to be stuck with Beth for the rest of her life, either."

With that, Mick disconnected the chat window and closed the laptop with a smack.

The room finally frigid to his liking, Mick lay down on the bed and closed his eyes, replaying the visions he'd seen when he peered into Bella's past.

Whatever had happened, it had been a long time ago; distant events were always foggiest. Yet, these seemed obscured further, as if Bella was actively trying to block him from seeing them. Mick shrugged, knowing that couldn't be possible.

He had tried to see the Cold One that bit her, but the vision kept coming back to a forest. Bella was on the ground, writhing in pain and crying. It was dark, and shadows were descending on her. She was cold, but she didn't shiver. She just continued to lie there, knees to her chest and arms wrapped around herself. Finally, there was no more pain; there was just emptiness, numbness. A pair of strong hands picked her up and clutched her to a scorching, solid chest. And the vision ended.

Had this been when the Cold One bit her? It had to have been, Mick thought. It was the only thing that could explain the pain at the outset of the vision.

_But who did this? And why isn't she a Cold One, too?_

Mick then thought back to his second vision. He'd followed Bella closely as she and Charlie led him out of the station. He looked for any sign that she'd been turned, but he found none. After he'd agreed to meet her for lunch the next day and she turned to walk through the glass door Charlie held open for her, Mick took one more deep breath, searching Bella's scent for one last clue.

Again, the vision was cloudy, but a flash, imperceptible but to a vampire, caught Mick's attention. A face, strikingly handsome and calm, yet obviously a Cold One. The eyes, however, were the wrong color. Amber orbs stared towards him instead of crimson. Bronze, tousled hair framed the face, whose mouth was set in a tight, angry line. Mick could feel Bella's intense anger mixed with deep affection.

_She loved him. And then he bit her, the bastard._

He still couldn't figure out how she'd escaped being turned into a monster, one worse than what he was himself. Falling asleep, he couldn't shake the feeling Annie wasn't the only reason he'd ended up in Alabama.

***

Dinner with Jackson and his wife had long since become a Wednesday ritual, and Bella enjoyed sharing the week's events on patrol with him and Charlie. She loved being a beat cop, and, with only eight weeks left until she'd have her own cruiser, she tried to soak up all the knowledge and experience of the other cops around her. Charlie and Jackson had been great sounding boards and Wednesday night dinners a good sanity check.

As she sat on the balcony holding her nightly cup of tea made by Charlie, she felt uneasy. She'd wondered about the mysterious Mick St. John since he first called Charlie four weeks ago, and, at first, she thought maybe barging into Charlie's meeting with Mick had been serendipitous. Afterward, however, she felt like he'd somehow read every thought she'd ever had just by looking at her.

She examined the scar on her wrist, left so long ago by James, and rubbed the cold, raised tissue. She saw Mick glaring at it as he shook her hand, but, as quickly as she noticed the attention, it was gone. He had a odd look on his face, as if he knew exactly what the strange mark represented.

_But that's not even possible, is it?_

Worse than that, Mick's smile when he accepted her lunch invitation had made her think of him again. The memories were still so strong, even though she worked diligently to keep them suppressed. The fleeting image of his face made her angry, with him and with herself. She wondered if that face, once so loved, would haunt her until the day she died.

She breathed deeply, enjoying the sensation of the cool night air rushing into her lungs. The woods practically vibrated with the hum of animals preparing for winter. The trees would lose their leaves soon, and she missed their gentle rustle during the winter. The vibrant colors would all fade and turn brown, falling to the ground, and this made her sad, reminding her again that all things eventually must die.

Except him.


	8. Nothing Strange About This

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: The updated playlist and a video of Mick & Beth are available on my _Breathe Me_ page at http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/.**

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**Chapter 8: Nothing Strange About This**

Bella woke up in a foul mood, already on edge, when Charlie broke the news that he wouldn't join her and Mick for lunch.

"Damn it, Dad," she almost growled through her gritted teeth. "Is there any way you can get out of it?"

Charlie continued to slowly drink his coffee, glaring at her over the kitchen table. "No, I can't. We're setting the department budget for next year. What's your problem anyway? You were all about having lunch with him last night."

Still confused about Mick's knowing look and the vision of _Him_ it had triggered, Bella hadn't slept well. After waking several times during the night, she'd completely given up and decided to do some Internet research. The first hit was a sleazy website which claimed to have pictures, obtained from a disgraced former assistant district attorney, of Mick being hit by a car and jumping up unharmed. Bella assumed the pictures had been doctored somehow. But the second hit disturbed her, making sleep impossible the remainder of the night.

The page was an excerpt of a book about a killer who'd been paroled after the fairness of the conviction was called into question. The book had blamed the railroading on a private investigator, Mick St. John. Based on the year of conviction, Bella assumed the PI had been Mick's father. When she found a picture of the PI in the book, however, Mick himself stared back at her.

The picture was taken in 1950.

Bella stared open-mouthed at the computer screen. "Aww, fuck no..."

Now, the last thing Bella wanted to do was have lunch with Mick St. John, but she had to know what he was and what he was up to.

Charlie's knocking on the table awoke her from her daze. "Are you okay, Bells? I'm sorry about the last minute cancellation, but you don't have to go to lunch if you don't want to."

"No, really, it's okay," she said, taking a big gulp of orange juice. "I'm just disappointed we're not having lunch together."

"I promise, Bells, I'll make sure my schedule is cleared for you on your next off day." He kissed the top of her head as he walked past to put his coffee cup in the sink. "I'll call Mick and make my apologies."

Bella spent the rest of the morning inside her own head, going over the list of things for which she'd look during lunch today. She knew Mick couldn't be a vampire; she'd have noticed the cold skin when she shook his hand. Still, she couldn't explain how he'd been 30 years old since 1950 or how he'd been hit by a speeding car without suffering a scratch. And his eyes. His eyes were the deepest blue she'd ever seen, definitely not amber or scarlet.

The morning passed quickly, and she was soon in her truck driving toward downtown Guntersville. On the way, she finally decided how she'd handle the strange Mick St. John.

_If he says word one about my scar, he better be ready to explain what his deal is._

As she pulled into a parking spot in front of the pizzeria, she saw that Mick's Jaguar was already parked next to her. Mick was standing under the restaurant's eave as she walked toward the door.

"Hello, Bella. Sorry Charlie couldn't make it," Mick said, extending his hand in greeting.

Bella took his warm hand and shook firmly. "Good afternoon. I see you survived your first night in Alabama." Again, she noticed Mick quickly examining her scar.

_What the hell? Surely he's got to know I can see him doing that._

Mick laughed as he followed her into the restaurant. "Oh, this is a vacation compared to L.A."

She picked a conspicuous table in the center of the room, thinking that Mick would be less likely to react badly to a confrontation if practically everyone in town could see them. He pulled out her chair and waited for her to sit before sitting himself in the chair directly facing her.

Bella took the opportunity to closely examine him. His oval face and round jaw sloped into a dimpled chin, and he seemed to have the same five o'clock shadow he'd had the night before. His dark wavy hair barely brushed his collar. His deep blue eyes were focused on her, his eyebrows furrowed in a look of confusion.

"Trying to figure me out?" His voice was a smooth, calm tenor.

"Sorry," she said, waving over the waitress. "trying to read people is just one of those things that become second nature when you're a cop, I guess."

"Yeah, I do that a lot in my line of work, too."

The waitress sat two glasses of water on the table and stood over them, order pad in hand. "Hey, honey, what will it be for you today? Pepperoni and extra cheese?"

Bella blushed. "I eat here a lot, can you tell? What are you in the mood for, Mick?"

"Get whatever you like. I'm not hungry." He smiled at the waitress, who dropped her pad on the table with a loud thud.

"Oh, so sorry. You sure you don't want something, sweetie? I'd be glad to get you _anything_."

"Why do I feel like I've been here before?" Bella asked, rolling her eyes.

Mick looked at her questioningly and turned his attention back to the waitress. "No, I'm fine. Please get Bella her usual, though."

"Sure thing, sweetie." The waitress winked and sashayed back to the kitchen.

A shy grin spread across Mick's face. "Well, that was uncomfortable as hell."

They looked at each other for a second, silent, then broke into loud laughter. The levity lightened Bella's mood, and she tried to forget about Mick's repeated glances at her wrist. As she took a sip of water, she thought maybe she'd imagined the entire thing.

She choked in mid-swallow as Mick began to speak.

"I might as well tell you now and get it over with. I know how you got that scar."

***

When he looked out the window at the cloudy sky, Mick was relieved. He had dreaded the prospect of a full day in the Alabama sun almost as much as he dreaded lunch alone with Bella. Charlie called early to break the news, souring Mick's mood considerably.

Mick's first meal of retail blood helped clear his mind and settle his stomach. No matter how many times he'd replayed the visions, he came up with the same conclusion. Sometime somewhere a Cold One had taken advantage of Bella, and she'd survived and remained human.

Her survival was only further proof of the immense strength Mick had sensed inside her. It was the same strength he always felt when he was around Beth, and thinking of it made him miss her even more than he already had been.

He was surprised when she picked up on the first ring; it was only 5 A.M. in L.A.

"Mick, is something wrong?" she asked in a sleepy, slurred voice.

"No, I just wanted to hear your voice. I miss you." He suppressed a sigh.

_God, I'm so whipped._

"I miss you, too, baby. But I know that voice. What's wrong?"

At her soft prodding, Mick told her about everything: Charlie, Bella, the scar, and the strange, disturbing visions of Bella's past. Telling her made it seem all less overwhelming, and he was finally able to voice the thought that plagued him most.

"I'm afraid he's not finished with her yet."

Beth took a deep breath. "Then you have to say something."

"I know, I know. But how?"

"If it were me, I'd just blurt it out first thing."

"And that works for you?" Mick asked, knowing full well how often it worked on him.

"I really don't see the point in dancing around it. She's bound to know you suspect something. You're not as stealthy as you think you are," Beth said, laughing.

Mick mulled over her words all morning, wondering if confronting Bella directly was the best thing. She barely knew him, but, after peering into her past, he felt an odd kinship with the human who'd loved a Cold One. After all, he was a vampire who loved a human.

In the end, he decided not to broach the subject so soon. Seeing the scar again when he shook her hand outside the restaurant, however, renewed his determination to uncover Bella's secret. As she took a sip of water, he put Beth's advice into action.

"I might as well tell you now and get it over with. I know how you got that scar."

Bella swallowed hard before slowly lowering her glass and glowering at Mick across the table. "And I know you're not human."

Raising an eyebrow, Mick gave her an impressed nod. "Well, it's looks like I'm not the only one good at figuring things out."

She was silent for a moment before quietly speaking. "Is there really an Annie?"

"Absolutely, and she's really in trouble."

"Then we should get past this," she said, gesturing between them, "and concentrate on her, don't you think?"

He couldn't argue with the logic. "Yes, I do."

Bella looked over at the waitress, who had been staring at Mick intently since taking their order. "We can't do it here with the eyes and ears of half of Guntersville on us. Follow me to the house so we can talk in private."

Mick began to assure her she'd be safe with him but realized it wasn't necessary as she stood and walked out of the restaurant. He followed, first on foot then by car, until they reached Charlie and Bella's home. Bella motioned him through the house, leading him into the backyard. When they sat on a bench facing the woods, she finally began to talk.

"I'm really not sure why I'm going to do this," she said, her face falling into a heartsore frown. "But, after all this time, I just want to talk to someone who might remotely understand."

Just as he'd felt her strength before, Mick felt her sadness just as sure as it was his own. "You don't really know me, but I promise you that I do understand, more than you know."

Bella stared into the woods, but her eyes seemed far away. "I'm not originally from here, as you can probably tell. Dad and I moved here from Washington state almost three years ago. I guess that's why I like watching the leaves on these trees sway in the wind. It reminds me of Forks, as much as I hate to admit it."

"It is beautiful out here," Mick said, watching the multi-colored leaves dancing in the breeze.

"It is," she said, breathing deeply. "Forks is beautiful, too, in it's own way. But after he left, I just couldn't bear to be there. It just wasn't home anymore."

"He was a Cold One, right?"

She broke her stare and looked over at him, a confused look on her face. "A Cold One? You mean a vampire, don't you?"

It was Mick's turn to be baffled. "No, that's not a vampire scar. That's a Cold One scar."

"And you would know this how?"

She was baring herself to him, and he couldn't refuse to do the same. "Because I'm a vampire."

Silently pondering, she sat still for several seconds. "That would explain why you haven't aged. I found a picture of you on the Internet, only it was taken in 1950."

"Yeah, didn't know that was still out there. I was turned in 1952."

"But vampires are cold to the touch, and they don't have beating hearts. Your eyes are the wrong color. And you can go outside without...well, you can go into the sunlight."

He realized they weren't speaking the same language. "That's what vampires are. Cold Ones are, for lack of a better term, primitive vampires. Our bloodline, the true vampire, has evolved. Our warm skin, heartbeat, even our eye color allows us to blend in better with the humans around us. It protects us, makes us better hunters."

She looked at him strangely. "How are you able to be around humans? Isn't it painful?"

"Painful?" He nodded in understanding. "Oh, we don't have the bloodlust like they do. We can feed without killing or, like me, drink donated blood."

"Well, isn't _that_ convenient?"

"Did you love him?"

Bella lowered her head and ran her hands through her hair. "Yes, very much. But it apparently wasn't enough."

Having ignored the impulse as long as he could, Mick reached and took her hand in his. A scarce smile lit her face, and she gently squeezed his hand. They both leaned back on the bench, watching the trees sway.

After several minutes, Bella glanced over to him. "So, what's your human's name?"

"Beth, her name is Beth." He tried not to smile at the thought of her but couldn't help himself. "How did you know?"

"You said you understood. I figured that's what you meant." She withdrew her hand from his and turned toward him, the sad frown gone. "Thank you for listening. And for the vampire lesson," she said, laughing.

He hated to ruin her restored mood, but it had been the entire reason for starting the conversation in the first place. "Just one thing, Bella."

"Yes?"

"He'll be back for you."

Her laugh was bitter. "No, he won't. He doesn't care enough to bother."

Mick thought she sounded as if she _wanted_ him to return, but he knew that made no sense. "Tell me, how did you manage to get bitten without turning?"

"To avoid turning, another vampire can suck out the venom." Her voice made it clear she was tired of talking about the past, and she quickly switched topics. "So, tell me about Annie."

***

Bella and Mick sat in the backyard talking until nightfall. After dreading simply having lunch with Mick that morning, Bella was relieved to finally have a confidant, someone who knew the secret she never shared. When he said he understood, she believed him. By the time Charlie arrived home from work, Bella and Mick felt like old friends.

Over a dinner Mick didn't eat, the three discussed how best to tackle finding Annie. Charlie told Mick everything he knew about Phelps, beginning with a list of associates and concluding with his mother's maiden name. Bella committed to searching the HPD computers for recent prostitution arrests after Charlie reluctantly disclosed Phelps' bad habit of turning out his old girlfriends. This revelation had elicited a small growl from Mick, but, luckily, Charlie didn't seem to hear.

When Bella finally succumbed to a yawn, the three agreed it was time to say goodnight. As they walked to the front door, Mick and Bella exchanged cell phone numbers and knowing glances, two friends bonded over a mutual secret. After his car drove away, Bella went to her room to change for bed.

She sat on the balcony as she did each night, and Charlie joined her, handing her a cup of tea as he did each night.

"You and Mick seem to be getting on pretty well," Charlie said, winking.

Bella took a sip of tea. "Hate to break it to you, but he has a girlfriend back home."

"Oh, well, you can't fault me for hoping."

She sighed, weighing whether she wanted to say what was on her mind. "Dad, is it bad that I still think about him?"

She could see his back straighten then relax. "No, Bells. It's only natural, after all you felt for him." He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. "I still think about your mom sometimes."

"Me, too, Dad. I miss her a lot."

Charlie cleared his throat and shuffled his feet nervously. "Well, I'm going to try and get some sleep. Budget meetings take a lot out of a guy."

"Okay, Dad." As he walked out of the room, Bella called after him. "Love you, Dad."

"Love you, too, Bells. Get some sleep, okay?"

"Okay."

As she watched the breeze blow through the trees, her cellphone beeped. She picked it up, and a new text message icon flashed on the screen.

"Beth says hi – Mick"

Bella chuckled as she typed a reply.

"You know you're completely whipped, right?"

The reply was almost instantaneous.

"Yep, unconditionally and irrevocably."

_Silly vampire._

She sat, listening to the rustle of the leaves, until her heavy eyes shut and she fell asleep.


	9. When They Aren't Looking

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: For spoilers and links to playlist videos, follow me on Twitter: fragilehuman**

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**Chapter 9: When They Aren't Looking**

"Swan! Come here a sec!"

Bella hated domestic violence calls, and those involving children were the worst. The neighbors had heard a small child screaming and called police. By the time Bella and her partner arrived, several other cops were wrestling the perp, apparently a cousin left to babysit while the mother worked, to the ground. When she heard the senior officer on scene call her name, she ran over to him.

"Swan, there's a kid in there, and he won't let any of us near him," he said, obviously disturbed. "Go in there and see if he'll respond to you."

She knew it wasn't sexism that led him to ask her, the only female officer there, to help. She'd learned quickly that children were often scared of the police, and sometimes a female cop was able to make contact when no one else could. Since the perp was male, she was sure the child was especially afraid of the big men in blue.

The door on the right side of the small gray duplex was open, and she walked slowly up the concrete steps to the front porch. Inside, the living room was neat and organized, but, further into the kitchen, she could see Cheerios covering the floor and a toddler's wooden high chair on its side. She could hear a small child crying, "No, want Mommy! No, want Mommy!"

Bella walked into the kitchen, and she could see the small tow-headed boy cowering in the corner. He appeared to be around two years old. His light green eyes were red and swollen, and the left side of his tear-streaked face was covered by a hand-shaped bruise. His little nose had been bleeding, and she knew his cheekbone was probably broken. And he was terrified.

Walking over to the two officers reaching out for the boy, she motioned them back. She took off her duty belt and gun, handing everything over to the nearest man. "Take this and back up into the living room. Let me see if he'll come to me." Both officers, looking grim, did as they were told.

Bella moved toward the boy, who trembled and turned his face toward the corner. "No, sweetie, it's okay. I won't hurt you," she said, sitting cross-legged on the littered floor. "I just want to sit here with you."

She sat still, watching as he began to turn toward her tentatively. She swept a circle on the floor clean and began lining up Cheerios, counting them or making shapes. He watched her intently, and, after several minutes, he began to slowly move toward her. Looking up only briefly to smile in encouragement, she returned to the shapes, creating a smiley face and a sun. A few minutes later, he was sitting beside her on the floor.

When she looked over at him, his tiny face looked apologetic. "Baby spill," he said, running his hands over the cereal on the floor.

Bella's stomach turned.

_All this over fucking spilled Cheerios?!_

"It's okay, sweetie." She held her hands out, and the small boy climbed into her lap. "Can you show me where it hurts, sweetheart?"

His little hand touched his cheek, then he lifted his blood-stained t-shirt. There was a large, black bruise along the left side of his ribcage. Afraid of jostling broken ribs, Bella gently held him and stood. When she did, he straddled her waist and put his tiny hand on her cheek. It was then she realized she was crying.

Bella turned toward the living room and found her partner watching her; the look on his face was one of constrained rage. "God, tell me the ambulance is here," she mumbled to herself, walking toward the door.

Once outside, she carried the boy to the ambulance, and she was glad to see a female EMT had taken the call. She and the EMT exchanged a sad glance as the little boy reluctantly climbed onto the stretcher. Bella was wiping her face clean with the back of her hand when she heard yelling.

"I didn't do anything to that damn kid! He's stupid and clumsy, and he just fell down!"

Bella dashed over to the perp, who was standing handcuffed by a cruiser. She had his shirt clenched in her fists and had pinned him against the car before anyone could stop her. Rage, hot and stabbing, flowed through her body, and, at that moment, she wanted nothing more than to beat his head against the Cheerio-covered kitchen floor.

"You sorry motherfucker!" she screamed through clenched teeth. "I guess that goddamned handprint just appeared on his face, too!"

Before Bella could say or do anything else, her partner and another officer pried her away from the prisoner and pulled her toward her cruiser. Breathless and seething, she finally leaned against the car.

Her partner patted her on the shoulder. "Look, everyone here knows that's one son of a bitch that needs a beat down, but that's not our job. This is your first bad call, and we all did the exact same thing the first time. If you didn't, you wouldn't be human. But you did good, Swan, with the kid in there. Just remember that."

"How do you get used to it?" she asked, running her hands nervously over her hair.

Her partner grimaced. "You don't. You just learn to control the anger, or else it will eventually control you."

Bella spent the rest of the shift mulling over his words. She'd let her emotions and her anger control her once, and she'd learned to handle it. She hoped she could learn to handle it again.

At the end of her shift, she left the precinct and walked to her truck. She planned to meet Mick for breakfast, and, after her outburst overnight, she called Charlie and asked him to join them. She needed to talk to Charlie, not only as a fellow officer but also as Dad.

As she reached for the truck's door handle, she felt the tingle travel up her spine again. It had happened several times over the last two days, and she couldn't shake the sensation of being watched. She looked at her surroundings, and, just like the other times, there was nothing. She climbed into her truck, determined to mention it to Mick, no matter how crazy it would make her sound.

She cried the entire drive home.

***

Mick had only been in town two weeks, but he had become fast friends with Charlie and Bella. He met with Bella most mornings after her shift to talk and exchange information on his case. He'd gather information and pass it to her and Charlie. They would, in turn, use their police connections to try to get more information. Phelps had lots of cash and no cell phone, so tracking him across country was close to impossible, especially after he ditched his car in Colorado. Still, he was contacting his associates back home, letting them know he'd be there soon. After finding out he was traveling with a fifteen year old, most dealers were glad to tattle to Mick. They didn't really care about the girl; they just resented the police attention it would bring on their operation.

He hadn't expected this morning to be any different until Charlie walked into the diner. Wringing his hands, Charlie repeated his phone conversation with Bella, and they exchanged worried looks. They both knew no one, no matter what kind of training they had, was truly prepared to deal with violence toward a child.

When Bella pulled into the parking spot in front of the door, Charlie and Mick stood, watching her slowly walk inside. Her eyes were bloodshot and tired, and her body sagged under the weight of the last day. As soon as she and Charlie made eye contact, Charlie held out his arms, and she fell into his embrace. Mick gently ran his hand up and down her arm, and she looked up at him, a sad smile on her face.

Sitting at the table, Bella took a sip of orange juice Charlie ordered for her. "I just don't know what happened. I just went off on the guy. I've never wanted to hurt someone before...well, not really hurt someone. And I _really_ wanted to hurt him."

Charlie nodded, petting Bella's hand gently. "That's normal. I remember the first child abuse call I ran. The guy was mad at his daughter because she broke a plate, and he threw her against the wall so hard she made a hole in the sheetrock. Fractured her skull." Charlie's hands formed fists, and he clenched his teeth. "I had him down on the ground and a few good punches in before they got me off him."

Mick thought about Beth, how she'd been a scared little girl when his ex-wife and sire Coraline had kidnapped her. He _wanted_ to kill Coraline and thought he had. He knew, however, that was not a story he could share with Charlie; he'd tell Bella all about it another time. "There is true evil inside a person that would hurt a child. But you," he said, pointing to Bella, "you have to be careful to not let someone else's evil turn you into a hard person."

"I just never knew I had that inside me. To be honest, it was a little scary." Bella shook her head in disbelief. "I think the guy wet his pants."

The table fell silent then erupted into raucous laughter.

Charlie's eyes watered as he tried to be serious. "Damn, Bells, you must have really lost it. Remind me not to piss you off."

"I shouldn't laugh," Bella said, giggling, "but I keep thinking about Smith having to hose out his cruiser at the end of the shift. He's probably still mad at me."

Mick felt relieved. If she could laugh about it, he thought, she'd be okay.

_Black humor is a cop's best defense._

The three continued to talk until Charlie left for the station, leaving Bella and Mick to themselves. Mick could tell she had something on her mind, and she seemed to be waiting for Charlie to leave before saying it. As soon as Charlie hugged her goodbye and walked out the door, Bella began to hesitantly speak.

"I need to tell you something, but it's going to make me sound completely bonkers."

"Well, as long as you don't tell me you've seen a werewolf, I think we'll be okay," Mick said jokingly.

Bella's old smile lit up her face. "Ha ha, very funny. But, seriously, I need to tell you something."

"Okay, shoot."

"I think someone is following me."

Mick froze. He didn't think she was crazy, and he didn't have to think long about who would want to follow her. "Have you seen anyone, anything out of the ordinary?"

"Nothing, nothing at all," she said, scratching her head. "It's just a feeling I get. A chill up my spine. I know it doesn't make any sense..."

"Don't worry about explaining it. I believe you."

She sighed. "I'm starting to think I'm losing it. Especially after today."

"When did you first notice this?"

"Two days ago," she said sheepishly. "At work, then at home."

Mick's reply was stern. "Damn it, Bella, why didn't you say something sooner?"

"Like I said, thought I was going nuts." She tapped her jacket at the hip. "Plus, it's not like I don't have some way of protecting myself."

Mick glared at her.

_Yeah, like that 9mm is going to take out a Cold One._

Bella leaned over the table and whispered. "I just thought that you being...what you are...could look into this for me."

"What do you want me to do?" he asked, whispering as well. "Bite him?"

Bella's eyes widened, then she threw her head back and laughed. "Um, no! I figured, since you're a private investigator, you could maybe track this person down without getting the cops, mainly Charlie, involved."

"Oh," Mick said, embarrassed. "Yeah, that would make more sense than the other, wouldn't it?"

Bella petted his head and whispered again. "Silly vampire."

Mick rolled his eyes and stood, taking Bella's hand to help her onto her feet. "Great, tease me. All the women in my life seem to like to do that."

"All two of us?" She winked at him as they walked out the door.

As soon as they were outside, Mick could feel it. Eyes on them, watching them. He could smell the scent of Cold One drifting through the air. He didn't want to startle Bella, so he walked her straight to her truck and promised to meet her after her Wednesday night dinner with friends.

As soon as she pulled away, however, the scent was gone. He noticed the sun breaking out from behind the clouds that had obscured it all morning; the Cold One would have to go into hiding until nightfall. The monster would not be able to resist returning to Bella, and Mick planned to be there waiting.

***

Once home, Bella changed out of her uniform into a her old comfortable sweats. The navy blue had faded, and the cuffs were frayed around her ankles. Still, wearing them kept her warm and made her feel safe. Safe was something she wasn't feeling a lot lately.

She'd first noticed the strange tingling as she sat on her balcony two nights ago. Someone was in the woods, watching her as she drank her tea. She felt silly for thinking it at first, but, as the feeling grew stronger, she was convinced of it. Her balcony, the one place she could be alone with her thoughts and her secrets, was now off limits. Each time she went out the balcony doors, she felt as if she were coming onto a stage, where every move was on display.

That night, Bella snuck into Charlie's room and took a pump-action shotgun out of the gun safe. Jackson had told her once he preferred the pump-action shotgun for home defense. He figured the sound of the pump loading the shell into the chamber would scare off most intruders, and the stupid ones would get a shotgun blast to the chest. To Bella, that plan seemed as good as any, and she hid the gun underneath her bed.

As she looked through the drapes on the doors, she wondered who could be so stupid as to stalk a police officer. She had made a few people angry her first few weeks as a cop; most of them, however, were still sitting in the city jail. She wondered, too, about Phelps, but he'd been sighted in western Tennessee earlier in the day. As much as she hated to involve Mick, she needed some help, and it was better than having Charlie scouring the woods with half of the Guntersville police department.

Exhausted, Bella checked the lock on balcony doors and crawled into bed. She wondered, as she drifted off to sleep, if her stalker had seen her throw last night's perp against the patrol car.

_Yeah, don't fuck with me. I'm all tough Bella now._


	10. Just a Little Late

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: An updated playlist and a new story button are available on my **_**Breathe Me**_** page at http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/.**

* * *

**Chapter 10: Just a Little Late**

_Bella stood over the trembling man, pinning him to the ground. "Like to hit little kids, do you? Are you scared now, motherfucker?"_

_The man didn't speak, but his eyes were wide with fear. When he began to cry and beg for his life, Bella only laughed._

"_Come on now, don't be such a baby."_

_She felt the bloodlust coursing through her body, and, with movements so quick she blurred, she pulled the man's head to the side and sank her teeth deep into his jugular. She felt the warm blood rush into her mouth, but it was also spurting, spraying her face until she couldn't see._

_Cold hands pulled her from the man's neck. Wiping blood from her eyes, she looked up to see him, smiling down at her._

"_You're doing it wrong, love. Let me show you."_

Gasping for air, Bella sprung up from the bed, her hair and clothes wet with sweat and sticking to her. Her head jerked in every direction as she remembered where she was: in her room, safe and human.

"What the hell was that?" She shook her head, trying to free it from the dream's cobwebs.

"Bells," she heard Charlie calling from downstairs, "are you awake? We have to be at Glenn's soon!"

_That's right, Wednesday. It's Wednesday. Time for dinner at Jackson's._

"Yeah, Dad, getting in the shower right now!"

Bella walked slowly to the bathroom, still confused about the dream and its meaning. As she let the shower's hot water wake her, she decided to discuss it with Mick when he came to see her after dinner.

***

Mick stood in the woods behind Bella's house, wondering why the Cold One was still there. Since the morning Bella told him she was being followed, Mick trailed her. Each night, the pattern was the same. As soon as the sun set, the Cold One appeared at the edge of the woods, waiting for Bella to leave the house. When she did, she was shadowed, which continued all night. When Bella returned home, the Cold One would wait for her to turn off her bedroom light before leaving until the next sundown.

He took care to remain downwind at all times lest his scent give him away. With his keen vampire senses, Mick was able to stay over a hundred feet away and still be entirely aware of the Cold One's movements. He was convinced that Bella was in danger, yet she'd been alone several times without being attacked. To Mick, none of it made sense. Tonight's variation of the pattern added to his confusion. Mick fully expected Bella to be followed to dinner at Jackson's house, but she wasn't.

Instead, the Cold One jumped to the second floor balcony. Mick watched intently from the ground as the monster leaned against the door, forehead against glass, and breathed deeply. Mick knew the locked door was no real obstacle for any vampire, evolved or not, and he began to worry about what would happen once Bella returned home and lay down in her bed.

_Charlie and Bella won't have a chance._

In a flash, Mick pounced onto the balcony, grabbing the Cold One by the throat. "Why are you here?" It was barely a whisper, but, to a vampire, it was a loud as a piercing scream.

Startled, the monster stuttered. "I...I...I meant no harm."

"Bullshit!" Mick tightened his vise-like grip. "You don't know how to do anything else!"

"I swear, I don't want to hurt Bella."

Through clenched teeth, Mick deliberately spoke. "And I'll make sure of that if it's the last thing I do."

Never releasing his captive, Mick leaped to the ground and ran full speed into a tree at the edge of the woods. The Cold One's body crashed into the tree with a sickening sound, and the dense tree trunk cracked and splintered.

"Stop, let me explain! If I could just talk to Bella, to Charlie..."

Mick knew the crash had done no real damage, and he had little choice but to dismember the monster. "If you think I'm going to let you near either one of them, you've got another thing coming!"

One hand still clamped around the Cold One's throat, Mick raised his free hand. The monster's cold fingers immediately wrapped around Mick's wrist and attempted to pin his arm back behind him. Mick and the Cold One locked eyes, and, for a moment, Mick thought he saw fight change to fateful resignation.

The sound of a shotgun blast and a muzzle flash over their heads shocked them out of their staredown. Mick turned to see Bella standing, mouth hanging open, a shotgun in her hand, and a shell casing at her feet.

***

Charlie needed to go to the station after dinner, so Bella decided they should drive to Jackson's house separately. She was a block down the street when she realized she'd forgotten her cell phone. At the four-way stop, she jumped out of her truck and ran to Charlie's cruiser, motioning him to roll down his window.

"I forgot my phone. I need to go back and get it in case I get called in to cover a shift."

Charlie sighed. "Okay, I'll meet you at Glenn's."

Bella jogged back to her truck, making a quick u-turn and driving toward the house. She unlocked the door and headed straight for her bedroom, sure that the missing phone was on the shelf over the bathroom sink.

As she opened her bedroom door, she heard shouting in the back yard. The voice was clearly Mick's, and he was livid.

"If you think I'm going to let you near either one of them, you've got another thing coming!"

Bella had never heard Mick raise his voice, which always had a calm, smooth timbre no matter the words. Yet his scream was full of fury and implied violence, and it made her shudder.

She grabbed the shotgun hidden under her bed and bolted downstairs. Bursting through the back door, she saw Mick, tensely standing, fist balled and shaking, pinning someone against a sagging tree at the edge of the woods. She couldn't shoot the intruder without hitting Mick, so she opted for a warning shot fired over their heads. She raised the gun and slowly squeezed the trigger.

The muzzle flash was blinding against the dark sky, and Bella blinked to focus past the halos in her vision. She finally saw Mick turn to face her, and her jaw dropped in shock. His eyes were no longer a deep blue but completely white, small slit pupils and the barest blue tint where his irises once were. It was the first time she'd seen his fangs, and he was baring them, ready to bite.

His voice was an eerie rumble. "Go back into the house, Bella. I can take care of this."

Mick lowered his raised fist but did not release his hold on the intruder. As he continued to turn toward her, she could see a face behind him slowly revealed in the moonlight. She gasped as she came face to face with a ghost, a ghost with bright, shining amber eyes.

Edward.

The world spinning around her, Bella wobbled slightly on her unsteady feet. Memories, suppressed and dim, became bright and detailed as they flashed through her mind. Although she was sure she should feel relieved or even happy that Edward had returned, she had only one overwhelming emotion as she straightened her back and raised her chin.

She was angry.

Bella lowered the shotgun muzzle but did not drop the gun. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

Mick turned his attention back to Edward, still pinned to the tree. "He's here to finish what he started. I told you he'd be back."

"What _are_ you talking about? If you hadn't stopped me, she would have never known I was here." Edward's voice was velvet and dripping with condescension, just as she remembered. "Could you please ask him to let me go?"

_Who the hell does he think he is?_

"Let him go. He won't hurt me."

Stupefied, Mick slowly released Edward and moved to Bella's side, pushing her behind him as he shielded her with his body.

"I asked you a question, Edward," Bella said coldly. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

Edward began to move toward her but stopped when Mick snapped his teeth. "I came to make sure you were okay. When Alice saw Mick here..."

Bella huffed. "Alice, I should have known."

"Who's Alice?" Mick asked. "And how does he know my name?"

"He's a telepath."

"That's just great," Mick said, rolling his eyes. "A caveman that does magic tricks."

Edward, his eyes now inky black, stormed toward Mick, stopping just inches away. "And what are you, her guard dog?"

"Whatever I am, I'm here to make sure you don't bite her again." Mick stood his ground, and the tension between the two heightened.

After a few seconds, Mick's words finally registered with Bella, and she softly placed her hand on his shoulder to calm him. "Mick, it wasn't him. Why would you even think that?"

Mick turned his head to the side, warily looking at Bella. "I saw it when I read your past."

"Now who's the magician?" Edward's face twisted into a smug smirk, which only made Bella more angry.

"You," she said, pointing insistently at Edward, "shut up. You," she said to Mick as she let her hand soothingly stroke his arm, "we'll discuss this past reading thing later." She felt Mick's taut muscles relax, and he took a deep, calming breath.

Edward's smirk fell as he watched Bella's gentle treatment of Mick. As much as she knew it shouldn't, his discomfort made her happy, and she returned to her questioning. "Have you been stalking me?"

"Yes, but..."

"No but. It stops...now." Bella's voice was clear and emphatic. "And tell Alice to quit spying on me."

Edward began pleading. "You don't understand. She did it for me, to make sure you were okay."

When she first acknowledged her anger, Bella thought she had it under control, but any pretense of control was shattered when he told her she didn't understand. "I don't need your protection. I can take care of myself. I've done just fine without you for three years, so you can just go back to your little coven and leave me alone!"

"I can't leave you alone...not now that I've seen you again." Edward reached out to touch her, but Mick pushed her further behind him.

"Oh you by God can, and you will!" Bella screamed, digging her fingers into Mick's arm. "Only this time I won't be fetal and alone in the middle of nowhere!"

Mick spun on his heel and wrapped his arms around her, clutching her tightly to his chest. "Edward, I think it's best if you just leave."

"Mick...Bella...please, just hear me out."

Tears welled up in her eyes, but Bella was determined not to give Edward the satisfaction of making her crumble again. "No. There's too much...too much you've done and too much you've missed. Everything is different now."

"I know," Edward said, his voice soothing and his eyes again warm amber. "Alice showed me."

A new wave of anger crested and crashed into her, and Bella snapped her head up from Mick's chest to glare at Edward. "What did she show you? Did she show you how I stopped living when you left me?"

"Yes," he said quietly, his head bowed.

Bella pushed away from Mick and began stomping toward Edward. "Did she show you how I came here? How I changed? Did she show you that?"

His eyes widened as he shuffled backward. "Yes."

Mick tried to grab her arm but missed as she jerked it away. "Bella..."

"No, Mick, I think I deserve to know, since it's my goddamned life he's been watching! What else did she show you?"

"She showed me Renee...I'm so sorry."

The revelation stopped Bella in her tracks. The mention of Renee's name caused a stabbing pain in her chest, and she covered her heart protectively with her hand. "You...knew? You knew she died and you couldn't even be bothered to make sure I was okay?"

"But you were; Alice showed me."

Suddenly, Bella's field of vision turned blood red, and she began to raise the shotgun. "Well, I hope she showed you how this ends, because it won't end well."

Mick ran to her, enveloping her in his arms while she struggled against him. "I think you need to leave, Edward," Mick whispered.

"I'm sorry Bella...I didn't think..." Edward's voice trailed off as he buried his face in his hands.

Bella's voice was once again ice cold. "Yeah, I'm sure you didn't. Now fuck off."

She ceased struggling and looked into Mick's worried blue eyes. Once her breathing returned to normal, he kissed her on top of her head and released her. Turning, she stumbled to the house, letting the shotgun fall to the ground along the way. Dazed, she climbed the stairs to her room and watched through the balcony doors as Mick and Edward talked. Mick gestured vigorously toward the woods, and, eventually, Edward disappeared into the trees.

Bella changed into her sweats and, finding her cell phone on the shelf over the sink, called Charlie to let him know she wouldn't make it to dinner.

***

Mick sat on the bench in Bella's backyard and waited. He knew she would want to talk to him, and he used the time alone to think about all he'd learned. He'd misunderstood the visions from their first meeting, that much was clear. But, he wondered, how had Edward, who obviously loved Bella deeply, hurt her so badly?

_Probably because he's a stupid, unevolved prick._

Mick chuckled to himself, thinking about all the ways he could needle the prim, smug Cold One.

"What's so funny?"

Mick raised his eyes and saw Bella, calm and comfortable, sit next to him on the bench. "Hey there. I was hoping, if I waited, you'd come see me."

She leaned against him, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I called Charlie and let him know I wasn't going to make it. He knows there's something wrong, though."

"What are you going to tell him?"

"The truth."

Mick was shocked. "The truth?"

"Well, the truth in Charlie terms," Bella said, laughing.

Her laughter echoed in the trees, and Mick smiled, impressed by her resilience. He was hesitant to revisit sore subjects, but, as always, his curiosity won out. "Can you explain to me what is really going on here, Bella?"

"First, I think you owe me an explanation about this past seeing shit."

"I can take a deep breath and see a person's past." He paused, waiting for her to digest the information. "I did it the first time I saw your scar. But everything was all disjointed and blurry, like you were blocking me."

Bella pulled back, sitting to face Mick. "I didn't block you; I blocked myself. You have to understand, I've spent a lot of energy the past three years pushing down every memory and emotion associated with Edward." As soon as she said his name, her hand covered her mouth then, a few seconds later, dropped to her lap. "I hadn't even said his name before tonight."

"How did it feel?" he asked, reaching for her hand.

"Honestly? The entire night just made me angry. I was so angry I couldn't see straight, and I just wanted to blow his damn head off and shut him up."

"You know, that wouldn't have hurt him at all."

A wry smile spread across her face. "Yeah, but it would have made me feel better."

"I'm sorry I looked at your past without telling you."

"It's okay, but don't do it again. I guess I should be used to vampires not telling me things," she said, shrugging.

Mick nodded knowingly. "Yes, lying by omission is a favorite sin of the vampire."

"You're tellin' me."

"Edward do that a lot?"

Bella turned to lean into Mick again, snuggling against him when he hugged her. "I'm pretty tired. Can't you just do your past seeing shit and save us both a lot of time?"

Mick hugged her closer, closed his eyes, and took one steady, deep breath. Her past, once dark and indistinct, was now in high definition. He saw every experience and felt every emotion she had, beginning with the first time Bella saw Edward in the cafeteria and ending with the last time she saw him in Forks. However, unlike Bella, he also understood Edward's struggle with the inner monster. He could see it on Edward's face and in his eyes. Mick knew, even before the vision ended, Jasper's attack on Bella had pushed Edward over the edge. Still, he thought, if Edward loved Bella the way he seemed to, the way Mick himself loved Beth, he should have been honest with her instead of trying to coddle her like a child.

When the vision dissipated, Mick cleared his throat and swallowed hard. "I'm sorry that you went through that, Bella. What are you going to do now? He still loves you, and he's not going anywhere."

Bella sighed, sinking further into Mick's embrace. "He loved a little girl, Mick, and I'm not her anymore. I think it's over."

"I don't know Bella. Is something like that ever really over?"

Bella was silent, but Mick hadn't really expected an answer. They sat, watching the brown leaves of early November fall to the ground. Soon, the trees would be bare, and they would not have the sound of the rustling leaves to help them forget the stresses of the day. Even so, Mick enjoyed the passing of the seasons. It reminded him of the natural course life should take, a course he would have taken under different circumstances.

"Well," Bella said, pulling herself from Mick's arms and standing, "I'm going upstairs and have my private little pity party before I have to face Charlie. I'm not sure I can keep it together for him if I don't."

He smiled, wondering what she meant. "Okay, but I'm going to stay here for a little while, just to make sure you don't have any more unwanted visitors."

"Good night, Mick." Bella flashed a brief grin before walking into the house.

Mick leaned back on the bench, stretching his legs and crossing them at the ankles. He listened closely, paying attention to each of Bella's light footsteps through the house, up the stairs, and into her bedroom. He could hear her turn on the CD player, and a loud song began playing.

_She thinks I won't hear her over the music._

A few seconds into the song, he heard the first of her soft sobs, each one like a twist of a knife deep in his heart. He listened until, with the last notes of the song, the sobs ceased and she descended the stairs to wait for Charlie.


	11. The Earth to the Sun

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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* * *

**Chapter 11: The Earth to the Sun**

He wasn't sure why he'd gone to her balcony. He only wanted to breath her in, slowly and without fear of discovery. In so many ways, her scent was the same, yet completely different. It was more complex. He could still sometimes smell a hint of strawberry, but more often it was the juicy aroma of peaches and another scent he could not identify. Something crisp, fresh, and green, smelling entirely new and alive.

At first, having been away from her so long, he found her scent excruciating. It burned like fire in his nostrils, his throat, and his lungs. He ran from her house without even seeing her, and it was days before he attempted to visit her again. Alice continued to assure him the vampire had not yet decided to harm Bella, giving him time to readjust to the almost overwhelming desire to consume her.

Edward knew leaving Bella in Forks had been a mistake. No matter how long he existed, it would be the biggest mistake he'd ever make. Once done, though, he didn't know how to undo it. He spent a year tracking Victoria across the Americas, but she didn't seem to be interested in anything other than tormenting him. Finally tired of her games, Edward called Jasper, and the two tracked her into the Brazilian jungle, where they made sure she never posed a threat to the Swans again.

It was during the trip home Edward learned Bella and Charlie had left Forks.

Being reunited with his family made the days more bearable, but it did not give Edward the peace he'd imagined. Bella had moved on with her life, just as he'd hoped, but everything inside him still yearned for her. The pull he felt never subsided. Not for one day, not for one second. In all his plotting and planning, he'd hadn't given any thought to how he'd fill the years without her. He hadn't prepared for a perpetual dark night of the soul.

Nor had he meant to have Alice spy, but, once he looked into Alice's mind and saw Bella again, he couldn't stop. Seeing her, even if only in cloudy visions through someone else's eyes, brought him a few moments of the peace that seemed to elude him. The visions were like an addiction, though, and the high he felt afterward soared a little less and ended a little sooner each time. He fought constantly against the urge to ask Alice to look, and, toward the end, he lost more often than not.

Seeing Alice's vision of a vampire who fed on human blood, he left his family with only the clothes on his back and his cell phone. He ran the entire distance, only hunting once he was in Alabama and sure Bella was still safe. Every day for three years, he'd imagined her face and what he'd do if he ever saw her again, and never once did he imagine standing in a thicket and watching her embrace another man, let alone another vampire.

Edward leaned against a large tree, nervously scraping the bark off in large chunks, as Mick and Bella sat entwined and whispering. It was exactly the way he'd found them the first night he saw her. Bella had changed, her shorter hair lighter from the Alabama sun. Her body was that of a woman, and Edward thought she looked impossibly softer. He could see all the experiences he'd missed sharing with her reflected in her warm brown eyes. When she smiled, though, he could still see the Bella who had been his, and, although he didn't know _this_ Bella, he knew he wanted her to be his, too.

Seeing Mick and Bella together that first night, Edward found he could easily hear Mick's thoughts. Entirely prepared to kill the vampire, he froze when everything became clear. One brief glimpse inside Mick's mind was all Edward needed to know that Mick would never hurt Bella and would stand in the way of anyone that tried.

He should have left then, returned to his family in New York.

He couldn't leave her, and he couldn't let her know he was there. He'd given up any claim he'd had on her, and, if Mick was who she wanted, he wouldn't interfere.

But he wouldn't leave.

Just as he had the first night he saw her, Edward lay on the ground, looking up at the woods' canopy and wishing the sky would fall and crush him into nothingness.

He heard the footsteps approaching, and, when they stopped, he looked up to see Mick standing over him.

"Well, hello there, Edward. Imagine meeting you here."

Edward jumped to his feet. "You certainly took your time in getting here," he said, his voice much harsher than he'd intended.

Mick looked at him inquisitively, an eyebrow highly arched. "Considering I'm here to help you, I'm the last person you should be angry with."

"I'm not angry," Edward said, teeth clenched.

"Then what's your problem?"

Edward hesitated. "You...you touch her a lot."

"And?"

_And it makes me want to fucking kill you._

"It seems something is going on between the two of you," he said, pushing the violent thoughts from his mind.

Mick walked over to a large fallen tree and sat on the trunk. "You know, don't you, that you don't have any right to be jealous?"

Edward could feel his eyes begin to darken. "I take it, then, there's something of which I _should_ be jealous."

"No."

"No?" he asked, his voice mocking.

Mick remained calm and looked at Edward intently. "No. I'm in love with someone. A human. Her name is Beth."

The revelation surprised Edward. He'd stopped reading Mick's thoughts after the first night, afraid he'd be unable to handle knowing Mick's feelings for Bella. He wondered if he'd read the entire situation wrong from the beginning.

Unsure, Edward continued. "But what if Bella wants to be with you?"

Mick shook his head. "What if doesn't matter."

"It absolutely does matter!"

Exasperated, Mick stood, walking toward Edward. "Edward, 'what if' doesn't matter because Beth _is_. Look, you can keep wasting your time playing this game, but I won't play it with you. What if the red-haired Cold One comes back? What if your brother can't control himself? What if you can't control yourself? You waste all your time on 'what if,' and you've forgotten about what _is_. And where has it gotten you? Where has it gotten either one of you?"

As Mick reached him and placed a hand reassuringly on his shoulder, Edward let down his guard and read Mick's thoughts. Suddenly, images of Bella's life since he left flashed before him. He saw her broken and alone, lying on the forest floor. He saw her ghost-like existence, and he saw her reclaim her life and become a strong, beautiful woman. These flashes were unlike anything Alice had shown him. He not only saw, but he felt.

Edward finally realized what he'd done. In trying to prevent a myriad of possible outcomes, he'd destroyed the only thing in his existence that was real, the only thing he could touch, taste, smell, and feel. While wallowing in self-pity over his misery and longing all these years, he'd failed to understand that Bella felt it, too. His pain had never stopped, and neither had hers.

Edward buried his face in his hands.

_I am such a fool._

When the flashes stopped, Edward wearily looked at Mick. "The red-haired vampire is dead."

"Good. That's one less thing for you to worry about," Mick said, patting Edward on the shoulder.

"Why do you want to help me?"

Mick looked at Edward with a mix of pity and fear. "Because when I see you, I see what my existence would have been like if I'd turned away from Beth. When I saw Bella's past, I understood why you left her. It was a stupid thing to do, but I understand it. But I also saw how she loves you..."

"Still? After what I've done?" Knowing Bella loved him made Edward feel guilty.

"She doesn't want to admit it, but she does. She's afraid, and you've got to get past that before she'll let you back in."

"I'll never leave again; she doesn't ever have to worry about that."

"It's not just that. She thinks you only want her if she's this delicate thing you have to protect. To be honest, if anyone needs protection right now, it's you."

"I love her as she is now," Edward said, looking toward the darkened balcony doors, "as I've gotten to see her the last few days."

Mick shook his head. "The stalking thing? It really does have to stop. It's creepy."

"I just wanted to get to know her again."

"Then take her to Starbucks and buy her a coffee. Capiche?" Mick looked at Edward as if expecting some resistance.

"Yes, I understand."

Mick sighed in relief and wrapped an arm around Edward shoulders, giving him a friendly shake. "She's not your biggest problem right now. We're going to do this the old fashioned way."

He looked sideways at Mick's arm. "You're just a touchy feely kind of guy, aren't you?"

Mick laughed. "See, and it doesn't mean we're in love, either. Edward, I hate to tell you this," he said, scrunching his nose, "but you reek."

"I've been sleeping in a cave under the state park," Edward said, indignant. "Not very conducive to maintaining personal hygiene."

Mick walked through the woods, laughing. "Yeah, we're taking care of that first. You can come to the lodge and get cleaned up. But you'll have to follow me on foot. There's no way I'm letting you get in the Jag like that."

***

After the events of the previous evening, Mick's sleep was restless. Even a morning call to Beth hadn't settled his nerves. He worked all day tracking Phelps and Annie to no avail, and, when he walked into the police station at dusk, he was almost hopeless.

_Please God, let one thing today go right._

"Charlie, are you busy?" Mick asked, leaning his head into Charlie's office.

As usual, Charlie's desk was a mess of papers and wrappers. He looked up from his computer and smiled, seeming to welcome the interruption. "No, not at all. Come on in."

Mick hesitated. "I've got someone with me that would like to talk to you."

"Sure, bring 'em in," Charlie said, standing to straighten his uniform shirt.

Mick walked through the door, waving in the unseen visitor. When Edward followed, Charlie's gasp filled the room. Charlie sprung across the office, fists raised. Mick stood between him and Edward, grabbing Charlie's shoulders and restraining him.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" Charlie shouted, straining against Mick's grasp.

"Charlie..." Edward said shakily.

"I'm _Chief Swan_. You gave up the right to call me by my first name a long time ago!"

Mick, afraid of bruising him, loosened his grip on Charlie's arm. "Charlie, he wants to apologize."

"I don't care what he wants! Does Bella know he's still here?" The anger in Charlie's stare turned into terror when he mentioned her name.

"No, not yet, but it will be okay, I promise," said Mick reassuringly.

Edward, head bowed, stepped toward them. "There's no excuse for what I did, and I'm more sorry than you can know."

"Sorry? You have no idea what you did to her, and you just come in and expect an apology will make it all okay?"

"Not expect...hope..." Edward's voice, full of pain and sadness, trailed off into a sigh.

Mick had expected this to go badly, but it was worse than he'd imagined. Charlie hated Edward. "Charlie, he was just a stupid kid then. He's realizes he's messed up, and he wants another chance."

"Well, he still looks like the same stupid kid to me," Charlie said, sneering.

The words made Edward wince, and he pulled back toward the door. "I'm sorry. I'll leave."

"Edward," Mick whispered, "wait for me outside."

"Let him go. I don't want him anywhere near my daughter!" yelled Charlie at Edward's retreating figure.

Mick pulled Charlie toward a chair and motioned for him to sit. Charlie glared at him and flopped down into the seat, his hands clenched around the chair's arms. "Why did you bring him here, Mick?"

Mick wasn't sure what Bella had told Charlie; he'd only heard muffled swearing and slamming doors as he walked to his car after his talk with Edward. He decided to just be honest...honest in Charlie terms.

"Edward was an idiot; no one's arguing otherwise. But he still loves her. Bella is angry, and she should be. But she still loves him, too."

Charlie shook his head. "No, this is unacceptable. He doesn't deserve a second chance."

"Maybe not. But haven't you ever lost someone and wished you had just one chance to make things right?"

Charlie's eyes widened then filled with defeat. "He'll just hurt her again."

"No, he won't," Mick said matter-of-factly.

"How can you be sure?"

Mick's stare turned icy. "Because I'll tear him to shreds if he tries."

An hour later, Mick walked through the familiar double doors of the station. Edward was standing against the building, running his hands roughly through his hair. Mick wondered if he'd ever seen a man look so lost.

Edward pushed himself off the building and walked slowly toward Mick. He was harshly wringing his hands, a grimace on his face. "What's the verdict?"

"He hates you," Mick said bluntly. "But he's going to stand aside and let Bella make her own decision."

"Because he thinks she won't take me back."

"Yep, pretty much."

Edward chuckled darkly. "Well, that would serve me right, wouldn't it?"

Mick knew Edward's habit of self-flagellation was in part due to the self-loathing all vampires and Cold Ones felt, but he wasn't entirely wrong about deserving the reactions he'd gotten from Charlie and Bella. Still, he had to get Edward focused on something other than stalking Bella and beating himself up.

"Edward, what you need is something to do between coffee dates with Bella. I need help with my case. Unlike you, I have to sleep, which leaves a lot of prime drug dealer business hours uncovered. You could do leg work for me instead of following Bella around like a puppy, and we all can meet up at the end of Bella's shift to discuss our leads."

For the first time since they met, Edward smiled. "It would be nice to make myself useful for a change."

Mick threw his arm around Edward's shoulders. "Great! Let's go pretend to drink some coffee and talk about it."

"Again, with the touchy feely? Really?" Edward ducked under and away from Mick's arm.

Mick shook his head, laughing, and the two vampires walked to the diner to discuss their new partnership.


	12. Take You for Granted

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Sorry this chapter was a little late. I took a week off to write an entry for the For the Love of Jasper contest: **

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* * *

**Chapter 12: Take You for Granted**

Driving home after her shift, Bella was exhausted. She hadn't slept well the past two nights, replaying Edward's reappearance over and over again in her dreams. She was just starting to doze off when the shrill peal of the cellphone roused her.

"Hello?" she asked, her voice slightly slurred.

"Bella? Did I wake you up? I'm so sorry! I thought you'd be working this morning."

It was Angela, and the early morning call made Bella immediately suspect the worst. "Angela! What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing's wrong. I'm sorry I freaked you out." She sounded genuinely apologetic. "I just wanted to tell you some good news, and I thought you might like to talk during your commute."

Of all the people in Forks who swore to keep in touch when Bella moved to Alabama, Angela was the only one who had. Through email and the occasional phone call, they'd become close friends. Angela and Ben had even flown to Atlanta and Nashville a couple of times over the years to meet up with Bella for the weekend. Angela had been Bella's only female friend after Alice left with the rest of the Cullens, and Bella treasured her.

Bella sighed. "I'm sorry, Angela. It's been a rough couple of days. I'd _love_ to hear some good news."

"We're pregnant!" Angela squealed, and Ben's laughter was barely audible in the background.

"Wow, that was quick!" Bella blushed, realizing how disapproving she must have sounded. "But, it's great, really. I'm so happy for you both." And she was.

After divulging more information than Bella ever wanted to know about the conception and gestation of the baby, Angela paused briefly. "Oh, listen to me prattle on. How are things with you, Bella? Tell me about your rough couple of days."

_It would be nice to talk to someone non-male and non-vampire for a change._

Bella took a deep breath and released it slowly. "Edward is here."

"Well, it's about fuckin' time!" Angela exclaimed. Bella could hear Ben choking.

Bella tried to stifle a laugh. "Damn, Angela, tell me what you really think."

"Sorry, it's the hormones. I'm suddenly swearing like a sailor. But, Bella, come on. We both know he can be a total bastard, but, really, you guys were meant to be together."

Bella was dumbfounded. She'd expected Angela to take her side, and this was definitely not taking her side. "So, am I supposed to just overlook everything and take him back, just like that?"

"Of course not," Angela said, her voice soft and sympathetic. "But don't turn him away out of spite, either. Hear him out, and decide if you can be with him again."

"Shouldn't I decide if I love him while I'm at it?" Bella asked, irritated.

"I think we both know you made that decision a long time ago."

Bella was wide awake now, one hand clenched around the steering wheel and the other shaking while it held the phone. Angela, sensing she'd hit a nerve, turned to small talk about Bella's job and Charlie. By the time she reached the lakes and the river bridge, Bella was more relaxed, contemplating what Angela had said earlier.

She wondered if it was all so simple, if her feelings were so transparent to everyone else. Anger was still the overwhelming emotion she felt when she thought of Edward, and she wasn't sure that would ever change. She had believed with all her soul that she would never see him again, yet she'd remained alone all these years. Had she really only been waiting for him to come back to her?

When Bella pulled into the parking space in front of the diner, she congratulated Angela and Ben again before saying goodbye and ending the call. She climbed down out of the truck, noticing the cloudy sky and wet pavement. It looked like it was turning into a rainy Alabama winter, she thought, which was still a good 15 degrees warmer and 15 inches drier than the average in Forks. Greeting a couple walking out of the diner, she was inside before she first looked for Mick.

There at the regular table, sitting next to Mick, was Edward, looking at her expectantly.

Bella balled her hand into a fist and stomped toward the table. Standing over Mick, she glared at him. "What the fuck, Mick?"

Mick shrugged, shaking the cellphone in his hand. "I've been trying to call."

"Bella..." Edward whispered.

She snapped her head toward Edward, grimacing, then spun back toward Mick. "Are you two vampire buddies now?"

Mick reached out and took Bella's hand, gently pulling her down to sit at the table. "Please, Bella, I did try to call you."

Bella sat down slowly, noticing Edward glowering at Mick's hand in hers. She took her free hand and gently stroked Mick's arm, smiling inwardly as Edward's eyes began to darken and his jaw tighten. "I know, Mick. _You_ wouldn't just spring something on me without warning."

Mick rolled his eyes. "Yeah, okay. Anyway, he wasn't going to leave, so I decided he might as well be useful. Maybe put his stalking abilities to better use looking for Phelps."

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here," Edward said, petulant.

"Oh, I'm acutely aware that you're here." Bella finally made eye contact with Edward, and he seemed to shrink from her hard gaze. "Since when are you a tracker?"

He frowned. "I did some tracking in South America."

"Oh, really, now? And pray tell, Master Cullen, what else did you do on your summer vacation?" Her voice was venomous.

"Nothing important."

_He's hiding something. He's always hiding something._

"Well," Bella began, leaning toward him across the table, "you know what I did? _Of course_ you do, don't you, Edward?"

"Tell me, Bella," he said softly, sorrowfully.

"Let's see. I went crazy. Then I moved across the country to get away from anything that reminded me of you. Then I survived a tornado. Then...what did I do?" she asked mockingly, tapping her fingers on the table and looking at the ceiling. She looked back to him, her eyes squinting into angry slits. "Oh, yeah, I _buried my mother_."

"Bella!" Mick gasped.

"What? We're just catching up, aren't we, Edward?" She didn't look away, waiting for Edward to break first.

"Yes," Edward said uncomfortably, finally looking away and toward Mick. "Catching up."

Mick tightened his grip on Bella's hand, having not let it go when she sat down. "Look, we could use the help, especially from someone who never sleeps. Phelps has been seen in Huntsville now, and we've got to find out where he has Annie."

Bella couldn't argue that another vampire on the trail wouldn't be helpful, and she wanted to find Annie more than she wanted to punish Edward. With a deep sigh, she acquiesced. "Fine, you're right. Especially if it keeps him out of my backyard."

"Okay," Mick said smiling, much more pleased than made Bella comfortable. "Let's go over the new game plan."

Bella listened intently as Mick explained the new division of labor. She was surprised to learn Edward had spent his time away learning to hack into various computer systems in addition to developing his tracking abilities. While she worked night shift and Mick slept, Edward would be able to move around Huntsville and Guntersville, trying to find Annie. During the day, Edward could go online and find out what he could through unofficial channels.

As much as she tried, Bella couldn't stop looking at Edward, especially when he spoke. Of course, he hadn't changed physically, but her memories, as sharp as they seemed, hadn't done him justice. He was unnervingly beautiful, his bronze hair tousled and framing his angular face. His eyes were soft, almost a caramel color, and Bella knew he'd hunted since she'd last seen him. His voice was soothing and had lost all the insolence it contained two nights ago. He may not be able to change physically, she thought, but something had certainly changed.

She noticed, too, that he wasn't even pretending to breath. They were in a public place, surrounded by people who might notice, yet he never once took in air. Staring at him, she finally realized what was wrong.

_It my scent. It's hurting him again._

She felt a pang of pity for him as he turned to look at her.

"You cut your hair?" he asked.

"Yeah, a while back."

"I liked you better with long hair."

Mouth gaping, Bella looked at him, all pity gone. "Well, I liked you better gone."

Edward jumped up. "Yes, well, I think we're finished here. I'll just wait outside..."

Bella watched Edward's retreat out the door and turned back to Mick, who was shaking his head disapprovingly. "What the hell?"

"Your guess is as good as mine," Mick said, shrugging. "He may be over a hundred chronologically, but he's a stupid 17 year-old boy emotionally."

Just then, Mick's cellphone rang, and he smiled widely as he read the caller ID.

Bella laughed. "Let me guess...Beth."

"Meet you outside in a minute?"

"Sure thing, silly vampire," she said, winking as she turned to give Mick some privacy.

Bella walked through the diner door and noticed Edward leaning against the corner of the building under a tree. Still smarting from his jab about her hair, she walked over to him.

"Out for a breath of fresh air?" She stood directly in front of him and noticed that he seemed to withdraw a bit.

"Something like that," Edward said sullenly.

Bella moved toward him, pressing forward in spite of his obvious discomfort. Edward backed up flush against the wall, and Bella wondered why, if her scent was so painful, he didn't just push her away.

Unable to suppress an evil smile, she reached out and placed her entire hand flat against the center of his chest. His solid frame shuddered uncontrollably for only a second, and then he was again cold and still. He wasn't breathing.

Bella closed the remaining distance between them and leaned forward. "That wasn't a very nice thing to say to me, Edward."

Edward sighed, his breath as sweet as she remembered. "I'm sorry."

She briefly rested her cheek against his, the coolness of his skin oddly comforting. Her lips gently brushed his ear, and she whispered.

"Breathe."

Edward buried his face in the crook of her neck, pulling a fistful of her hair toward him, and breathed deeply. He exhaled in a pained, ragged rush.

Bella chuckled, pulling away and spinning around on her heel. She could hear his labored breathing as she walked away.

_Now you know how I felt._

As she walked to her truck, she passed Mick, wide-eyed and watching them.

"Bye, Mick," she said sweetly, waving as she passed him.

Feeling a bit smug, Bella had barely driven a block when her cell beeped with a new text message. She knew it was Mick before she even looked at the screen.

"Cock tease"

Her reply was even shorter.

"Asshole"

***

Mick shook his head at Bella's one-word reply. He knew she was angry, and she had every right to be. But intentionally provoking Edward was dangerous, and, if he were being honest, a bit cruel. He began to wonder if throwing them together was a mistake.

Driving to Huntsville to follow a lead, Mick watched Edward stare at the passing scenery. "You didn't expect it to be easy, did you?"

"No, I didn't," Edward replied, still staring out the window.

"The hair comment certainly didn't help." Mick remembered mentally screaming at Edward as soon as he'd said it. He wondered if he'd heard him call him a dumbfuck, too.

Edward chuckled. "Yes, I heard that, too."

"What were you thinking? You don't want her to think you're pining over high school Bella."

"I'm not, truly," Edward said, sounding offended. "As wonderful as Bella was then, now she's so much more..." He paused, an unsure look on his face. "More."

_And I thought I was whipped._

"No one is as whipped as you are, Mick."

"Yeah, you're going to get on my nerves fast." Mick smirked, making a mental note to quit making mental notes. "So, what was that about her hair?"

"I just remembered how much I liked the smell of her hair and thought what a shame it was that it was gone. The words left my mouth before I could stop them."

Mick thought back to Edward's face as he stood against the diner, clutching a handful of Bella's shoulder-length hair. "And now?"

Edward fell back against the headrest, a dreamy look on his face. "Oh, it's so much better now."

_You're an awfully big pussy for a caveman._

Edward scowled. "I heard that."

Mick turned to face the road. "I meant you to."

A few moments of silence passed when Edward quietly spoke. "How do you do it?"

"How do I do what?"

"How do balance your feelings for Beth with your..._needs_?" Edward asked awkwardly.

"At first, I didn't. I was so scared of hurting her, I kept pushing her away. And, as much as it hurt me to do it, it hurt even more to see that pain in her eyes, that sadness that _I_ kept causing." Mick could remember every single time he'd touched Beth and let her go. He could remember the ache in his fingers as he longed to touch her, and he remembered her moist, empty eyes looking at him every time he rejected her. She'd long since forgiven him for hurting her, but he still hadn't forgiven himself.

Mick was still lost in his thoughts when Edward's voice broke through. "You're together now. What changed?"

"I almost lost her. She's my Beth, you know, and I almost lost her." He shook his head at the memory. "I finally realized that I was hurting her not by being a vampire but by not just loving her." Beth was everything to him, and he'd never realized the true depths of his feelings for her until he finally gave into them. Mick couldn't imagine ever being without her.

"You can..." Edward hesitated. "...bite her, right?"

"But I don't. I don't want it to be about her being my _food_. I want it to be about her being my _wife_."

Edward's jaw dropped. "Wife?"

"You didn't hear that," Mick said, pointing emphatically.

Edward guffawed. "Oh, yes I did."

"Alright, you did. But zip it, okay? I don't want to jinx it."

"Hmm, maybe if you stop referring to me as a caveman..."

"Fine, no more caveman digs," Mick agreed, throwing up his hands. "You know, you're taking all the fun out of being superior."

Silence followed as Mick concentrated on the small box in his inside jacket pocket. He hadn't planned to wait so long to ask, but the ring, custom ordered from Josef's favorite jeweler, didn't arrive until the day Mick left for Alabama. He found it in the seat of the Jaguar at the airport.

Edward cleared his throat. "You've tasted her blood once."

Mick was surprised the subject was so late in appearing. "Yes, once, in an emergency."

"I've tasted Bella's blood once, too," Edward said, starting out the window at nothing in particular.

Mick remembered Bella's explanation about the venom. "The scar, right?"

"Yes," Edward whispered.

Mick didn't have to be a telepath to understand what the awkward silence meant. Irregardless of the circumstances in which it occurs, drinking the blood of a lover is the most erotic experience a vampire can have. He imagined the same was true for a Cold One, except that their lovers tended to not survive the feeding. It must be agonizing, he thought, to know the one thing you crave the most is the one thing you can never have. Edward's guilt over feeling such pleasure in the midst of such a horrible situation must be tremendous.

When they reached their destination, Mick stepped out of the car and looked up at the slowly darkening evening sky. His existence was very different than anything he'd ever expected, but he couldn't be bitter anymore. As much as he once hated being a vampire, it had brought him to Beth. He hoped that, one day, Edward would be able to see his existence as something other than a curse.

"You know what today is, Edward?" Mick asked, grinning.

Edward, leaning against the car, pondered briefly. "No, not in particular."

"Today is my birthday," Mick declared. "I'm 87 years old."

"Well, you're just a youngster, then, aren't you?"

"Why, thank you, Edward. And you know what I want for my birthday?" Mick removed his cell phone from his pocket, scrolling through a list of numbers and pressing the call button. He tossed the phone to Edward, who caught it easily. "I want you to ask Bella out."

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea..." Edward examined the phone warily.

Walking over to Edward, Mick suppressed the urge to put his arm around Edward's shoulder. "Come on, you're not really going to deny me this _one_ thing on my birthday, are you?"

Edward cursed under his breath as he raised the ringing phone to his ear and walked away.

_He'll thank me later._

"I heard that!"


	13. Above Everything Else

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

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* * *

**Chapter 13: Above Everything Else**

Bella stared at the cellphone in her hand.

_What the hell just happened?_

Although she usually reserved balcony sitting for the end of the day, she'd been anxious to relax there ever since she was sure Edward wouldn't be watching. The rain had finally stopped, and she leaned back in her chair to enjoy the November breeze and the last of the season's leaves before she left for her shift.

When the phone rang, she didn't hesitate to answer, seeing Mick's name on the caller ID. The voice, however, hadn't been Mick's. It was Edward's soothing tenor, and, before she knew it, she'd agreed to see him Wednesday night.

She was still in shock when Charlie tapped on her shoulder.

"Bells, are you okay?"

Bella jumped. "Oh! Dad? Hey, I didn't hear you come in."

"Obviously," Charlie said, frowning with worry. "You okay?"

"I'm not really sure. Can you talk for a minute?"

Charlie sat on the cold balcony floor facing Bella, and it occurred to her that she should have a second chair for him. He held out his hand, taking Bella's and squeezing gently. "I have all the time in the world for you."

Bella slowly filled her lungs with the cool air, hoping to gain some courage from the pause it gave her. "Dad, I'm going to see Edward Wednesday night."

"Yep, I was afraid it had something to do with him." Charlie stared at her intently. "I know you still love him, and that he loves you. But that doesn't always mean you're supposed to be together."

"I don't want to disappoint you, Dad, but I can't live my life without knowing..." she hesitated, hot tears slowly trailing down her chilled cheeks. "Without knowing if..."

Charlie stood, pulling her into a tight embrace. "You could _never_ disappoint me. _Never_. If anyone understands, I do." He released her and cradled her face in his hands. "Just don't let him hurt you, because I don't want to have to kill him."

Bella could see in his eyes that he absolutely meant it.

_If he only knew._

Charlie slowly dried Bella's face with the sleeve of his jacket. "You've got to get ready for work now, Bella."

Bella stood, nodding. "Yeah, I don't want to be late for the shift." She stood on tiptoe and gave Charlie a quick peck on the cheek. "Thanks for understanding, Dad."

"Anytime, sweetheart," Charlie said, blushing.

Charlie quietly left the room, and Bella quickly pulled on her uniform. She wasn't sure if the anxiety she felt as she ran down the stairs was from hurrying to be on time or from expectation of what her meeting with Edward could mean. Either way, she thought, she'd know soon enough.

***

_Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn!_

Bella had wanted to be relaxed, in her sweats, and maybe even a little tipsy before facing Edward. Instead, she was rushing home, still in her uniform, having worked an extra shift at the last minute. She cursed under her breath as she pulled into the drive and saw Edward calmly leaning against the front door.

Her heartbeat quickened slightly as she climbed out of her truck and began to walk toward him. She'd forgotten how beautiful he could be, standing in the twilight, his golden eyes staring into hers. Her lack of control over her physical reactions to his simple presence irritated her, and she didn't want to be irritated.

As she brushed past him to unlock the door, he spoke. "Hello, Bella."

"Hello, Edward," she said, leading him through the door. "I'm sorry I'm late. I picked up an extra shift for a guy whose kid broke his leg. Let me just go upstairs and change into something less official."

Edward's eyes drifted up and down her body before settling again on her face. "It's okay. I always preferred you in blue."

Bella's face blushed a deep crimson, and she darted upstairs. She looked at the blue sweater and worn jeans she'd laid on the bed that morning.

_There is no fucking way I'm wearing that now._

She threw the sweater to the side and began rummaging through her closet, finding a flowing white linen peasant blouse. Changing into the blouse and jeans quickly, she examined herself in the mirror. Her cheeks were still slightly tinged, and she ran her hands quickly through her hair to tame it. As much as she hated to admit it, she still wanted him to think she was pretty.

Walking downstairs and into the living room, she found Edward sitting on the couch. He stood to greet her as she came to sit down next to him. It was the closest she'd been to him in three years.

She was overwhelmed by how strong the current between them still seemed to be. The tingle began in the arm closest to him, and it slowly spread over her entire body. Unable to bring herself to look him in the eye, she watched his hands, searching for any sign he was as affected as she was. She grinned smugly when he clenched his hands into white-knuckled fists.

Again, Edward was the first to breach the silence. "I want to tell you everything, but I'm not sure where to start."

Bella moved away, leaning against the arm of the couch to face him. "How about starting with leaving me in alone in the woods?"

Edward mirrored Bella's movements as he leaned against the opposite couch arm. "Yes, I handled that badly."

"You think?"

"When Jasper attacked you, it made me realize that you would never be safe with me. That, no matter how hard I tried, I could never keep you completely safe from what I am, what my entire family is. Sooner or later, I was going to bring harm to you again, and I couldn't have that." His voice was matter-of-fact, as if the decision had been akin to choosing a new pair of shoes.

Bella struggled to remain calm. "And what about what _I_ wanted, Edward?"

"You never wanted what was good for you, and I felt I had to make the hard decisions you couldn't." His gaze fell to his lap, as if he were finally ashamed. "I was wrong to do that."

"You were a dick, that's what you were."

"Yes, I'm sure I was."

"Where did you go when you left? Where's Alice and everyone else?" she asked, wanting to get more details while she could still think straight.

"They moved to New York state, and I left to track Victoria. I chased her for a year, all across North and South America. I finally called Jasper, and he helped me corner her in a tiny Brazilian village. After all that fear and running, she was amazingly easy to destroy." He paused as Bella coughed uncomfortably "Are you okay?"

"Yes," she said, clearing her throat. "Just a little freaked out, but fine.

Edward's eyes softened, concern evident on his face. "Should I stop?"

"No, go on." Bella waved her hand in encouragement.

"Afterward, Jasper and I rejoined everyone in New York. I missed you terribly, but, at that point, you'd left Forks. I thought you had moved on, and I wanted you to have a good life without me meddling in it."

"Then why are you back now? When I was finally okay without you?" Anger was beginning to show on the edge of her voice, and she tried to will it away.

"Are you, Bella?" Edward asked softly, his eyes searching hers intently. "Are you okay without me?"

Bella paused, not sure how much longer she could control her rage. "I have a good life here. Dad and I, we have friends and colleagues and...and purposes here that we never had in Forks. I don't know if I'm willing to give all that up for someone who looked me in the eye and told me he didn't love me anymore."

"Why did you believe me?"

Bella was incredulous.

_He did not just fucking say what I think he fucking said._

"What?"

"It hurt me that it was so easy for you to believe I didn't love you," Edward whispered, his eyes again downcast. "Why did you?"

Bella could not believe the audacity of the question. Her anger began to flow freely, and a haze covered her vision. Blood rushing through her head caused her ears to ring. "Because, up until that point, you really hadn't made a habit of lying to my face. How dare you pretend to be wounded because I trusted and believed you? You don't get to play the victim here."

Jumping to her feet, Bella paced in front of the couch. "And you didn't just leave me. You took Alice and practically everyone I cared about with you. You left me alone. How could you do that? And why did they let you? Didn't any of you stop to think, for one second, what that would do to me?"

Edward continued his downward gaze. "We know now."

"Yes, you do, because you had Alice _spy_ on me. The only reason you're here now is you were afraid someone else, another vampire, might actually want me." Her voice became loud and shrill. "You could just throw me away, but you'd be damned if anyone else would have me."

"It wasn't like that at all, Bella," Edward said pleadingly, grabbing Bella's hand and pulling her toward him. "I was scared for you."

Bella jerked her hand back and stood over Edward, only a few centimeters separating her jabbing finger and his nose. "I'm not a fucking child! I can take care of myself! You broke my fucking heart, Edward Cullen. You broke it into a million little pieces." Her voice and her eyes turned cold. "I don't need you. In. The. Least."

She knew it was a lie the instant she said it.

Edward fell to his knees at her feet. Looking up at her, his eyes were black pits full of pain, and he desperately grasped her hands in his. "Maybe not, but I need you. I need you so badly I ache. Do you want me to beg? Grovel?" he asked beseechingly. "Whatever it is you want, just tell me. I'll do it. I'll do anything if it will make you forgive me."

She'd finally broken him.

Just then, as she got what she thought she'd wanted, she didn't want it anymore. It made her feel mean and cruel. It made her feel empty.

***

He couldn't look at her anymore. The hate in her eyes was more than he could bear. Releasing her hands, he bowed his head and remained kneeling, wanting to stay near her until he was dismissed once and for all.

Everything he'd done, every stupid decision and mistake he'd made, led him to this moment. His being a vampire hadn't destroyed them; not letting himself love her had. He'd taken the most beautiful, perfect thing he would ever find in this world and crushed it. There was nothing he wanted more than to take back the last three years, go to their meadow, and just be.

Gentle, hesitant fingers began stroking the top of his head. He froze in disbelief, afraid if he moved it would stop. The sensation was electric and vibrated through his scalp to the rest of his body. As he gazed at Bella's feet, they stepped toward him, and he felt a gentle tug of his hair.

"Look at me."

Slowly raising his head, he saw Bella's warm, chocolate eyes, wet with tears, staring down at him. The rage that had twisted her features was gone, and sorrow replaced it. "Why didn't you leave when you realized Mick wouldn't hurt me?" she asked.

"Because I love you. I'd rather watch you be happy with someone else than not be near you at all."

Edward gasped as Bella reached down, placing her hands on either side of his face, cradling him gently. His eyes widening, he watched her bend and lean forward, her mouth slowly inching toward him.

Her lips were soft and warm against his, the kiss unsure. The brief contact made his lips tingle, and he was prepared to live on the memory of it forever. He was shocked when she kissed him again, this time without reluctance. When she opened her mouth against his, he parted his lips, too, deepening the kiss to finally taste her.

Bella pulled away, and Edward instantly mourned the loss of connection. She closed her hand around his, pulling him toward the couch. He sat down, expecting her to sit next to him. Instead, she sat in his lap, leaning her head on his shoulder.

Finally able to touch her, Edward cupped her face with his hand and kissed her gently. Wanting to keep himself under control, he didn't breathe, afraid her scent would drive him mad. He began whispering, punctuating each sentence with a soft kiss. "I love you. I have always loved you. I will always love you." He paused, looking into her eyes and hoping she could see the sincerity in his. "I'm sorry, more sorry than you can ever know, that I ever made you believe otherwise."

"I love you, too, Edward. I never stopped," Bella said, tears streaming down her face.

"Don't cry, love," he whispered, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "I don't want to make you sad anymore."

Bella shifted, straddling his lap, and kissed him again. The kiss began slowly, but, as she pressed herself against him, it became frenetic. When she wound her fingers into his hair and pulled, he broke the kiss, only to lean forward again to trail kisses down her neck. He pushed her loose blouse off her shoulder, revealing more of her soft skin for his lips to touch. Hearing her sighs, he gave into the flood of sensations, vowing to himself that he would never reject her, never deny what she wanted again.

Her back arched, she was too far away, he thought. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, pulling her snuggly into his chest. Their gazes met, and he saw all the love and hunger he felt reflected in the dark pools of her eyes. He could feel her heart pounding in her chest, her labored breath on his skin. Their mouths crashed together again in a deep kiss, as Bella's hands began running trails of fire all over his arms and chest.

Suddenly, Bella placed her hands in the center of Edward's chest and shoved herself away from him. Confused, he released her, sighing as she sat further back on his lap.

"We need to slow down," she said breathlessly. "I'm not ready for so much..."

"Intensity?" Edward asked, reading the expression on her face, his chest tightening with worry.

"Yeah, intensity." She took a deep breath, swinging her leg over his lap and standing in front of him. "I need to think. Can you just give me a little time?"

Edward stood and pulled her blouse up over her shoulder. "I have all the time in the world for you."

The tightness in his chest disappeared as a wide grin lit up her face. "So you do."

Reaching for his hand, Bella led Edward slowly to the front door. It was something a normal couple would do, he thought, wondering if they would be a couple again. Crossing the threshold, he turned, unsure how to say good night.

As he ran through the options in his mind, Bella leaned forward, rested her hand against his cheek, and kissed him. Neither chaste nor passionate, it was over too soon.

"Good night, Edward," she whispered. "I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yes, tomorrow," he answered, unable to conceal his elation. "Good night, Bella."

Edward stood facing the door as she slowly closed it, and he could hear her sigh and laugh as she walked up the stairs to her room. He walked though the woods back to the lodge slowly, enjoying the crunching sound of leaves under his feet and the lingering taste of Bella on his lips.


	14. All Alone

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

* * *

**Chapter 14: All Alone**

The events of the previous night still swirled in Bella's head and in her stomach as she sat drinking coffee with her partner. Every so often, as she remembered Edward's kiss, she gently touched her lips and sighed. The third time she did it, she looked up to find her partner quietly laughing at her.

As disapproving as Charlie had been, he'd laughed, too, when she done the exact same thing sitting on the balcony after Edward left. She had worried Charlie would be angry with her, but, just as he'd done every night since coming to Guntersville, he brought her a cup of tea, kissed her on the crown of her head, and told her he loved her. Her heart swelled as she remembered the declarations of love she received from the two most important men in her life.

When Bella and her partner walked out of the coffee shop toward their cruiser, the shift captain and another officer walked toward them. After a few seconds, she recognized the officer as the department chaplain.

"Bella," the captain said, walking to her.

She stiffened. He'd called her by her first name, and she knew that could not mean anything good.

"Yes, sir," she replied shakily.

The captain nodded toward her partner, and she could sense that he'd moved behind her. "Bella," the captain repeated softly, placing his hand gently on her shoulder, "I'm sorry to have to tell you that your father has been shot while on a traffic stop."

The world stopped rotating, but Bella continued to spin. She stumbled weakly, her partner grabbing her arms to steady her. "What? I don't understand..." She couldn't find the words to finish, and she stood, her mouth opening and closing wordlessly.

The chaplain took her hand, capturing her tenuous attention. "He was shot twice in the chest, and he's been airlifted to Huntsville Hospital. He'll be in the emergency room by the time you get there. I'm going to take your there now, okay?"

Bella still couldn't speak, only able to meekly nod her consent. She heard the captain tell her partner to follow, clearing both cars to run their lights and sirens on route. Even in her daze, she realized what that meant: Charlie's condition was very bad.

She only vaguely remembered calling Mick, who said he and Edward were already almost there. Edward was shouting in the background. "How could you have not seen it before, Alice? What do you mean it was all spur decisions?"

Even running code, the drive seemed to take an eternity. Bella tried to remember if she'd told Charlie she loved him last night and was relieved when she decided she had. She was angry with herself for not waking up early and seeing him before he left for the station that morning. For a split second, she was angry at Charlie for his annoying habit of making traffic stops every so often instead of calling a beat cop. She immediately felt guilty for the thought and promised God she'd never think another bad thought about Charlie if he'd just let him live.

When the chaplain's cruiser pulled into the ER's circular drive, Bella bolted from the car through the ER door. The security guard, seeing her uniform, waved her around the metal detectors. Standing on the other side, waiting for her, was Mick.

"Where is he?" Bella demanded.

"Bella," Mick replied, using the same tone the chaplain had, "he's in ER room 5, but I need to tell you..."

Bella didn't wait for him to finish, rushing past him toward the locked door into the ER. She called over a triage nurse, who waved an access card, opening the door.

The hall was crowded with officers from the Huntsville department, as well as sheriffs from the county. She knew the Guntersville officers hadn't had time to arrive, and they would soon join the others in their vigil. Searching the faces for someone, anyone who could help her, she finally saw Edward's amber eyes as he walked toward her.

"Where is he?" she demanded a second time.

Edward cradled her face in his cold hands. "Bella, love, you need to listen to me, okay? I need you to look at me and listen."

She froze; staring into his eyes, she thought she saw sadness. "Edward, you're scaring me."

"Bella, Charlie's gone."

A crushing pain began in her chest, and it felt like a gaping wound had been torn into her. She didn't need to hear the words again to believe them; Edward's eyes bore the horrible truth. She gritted her teeth, trying to keep the sobs from escaping. "Where is he? I want to see him."

Edward slowly stroked her head, just as Charlie had done the night before. "You don't want to see him like that."

Bella, taking in a deep breath, screamed with all her might. "I want to see him, goddamn it! Let me see my father now!"

The only sound in the crowded ER was the beep of patient monitors. Edward dropped his hand from Bella's face as he closed his eyes briefly and nodded. He held his hand out for her, and she took it warily. The mass of officers parted, and they walked hand in hand down the hall toward room 5.

Walking into the room, Bella's stomach lurched at the sight. Charlie lay on a trauma table, covered in a blood-stained sheet. Pushed to the side was a tray of bloody instruments, and the floor was slick with spilled blood. Edward stiffly wrapped his arm around Bella's waist, pulling her tightly to his side.

"The bullet tore through his aorta," Edward explained, his voice full of pain. "They thought they might be able to repair it, but there was too much damage. They didn't have time."

"Leave me alone with him," Bella whispered.

Edward tightened his hold. "No, I'm not leaving you alone. I'm okay."

"No, you're not." Bella peered up at him, and she could see his eyes turning black before her. "I just want to have a few minutes. Please."

Edward's arm slowly released her, and he kissed her forehead lovingly before walking to stand outside the room by Mick, who'd come into the ER from the waiting room.

Trying to ignore the blood around her, Bella slowly approached Charlie. The sheet did not cover his face, and the airway tube had still not been removed from his throat. His eyes were closed, and his face was very pale. Even though she knew there wouldn't be, she watched the sheet draped over his body for any sign that his chest was rising and falling. He was perfectly still. She slowly reached out to brush his hair back, and his skin was already unnaturally cool. Not knowing what else to do, she soothingly stroked his head.

Before she returned to Forks, she had forgotten what Charlie meant to her. He'd been a vague memory, a Summer irritation. Together again, she remembered how much he loved her and how much she'd loved him in return. As horrible as the event bringing them to Alabama had been, she knew it had brought them closer. Charlie, fearing he'd lost her forever that night in the woods and again when she gave up living, made sure she knew how he felt, how proud he was of her. She hoped, in turn, he knew how much she loved him, how proud she was of him. She'd never be able to tell him now.

It was then she realized that she was all alone.

She wasn't sure how long she'd spent with Charlie when she heard Edward's voice behind her. "Bella, we should go now. They'll take care of him, I promise."

Closing her eyes, she gently kissed Charlie's cheek. "I love you, Dad."

She turned and walked into the hall, now thick and blue with the addition of the Guntersville officers, save one. "Where's Jackson?" Bella asked the first Guntersville cop she saw.

"He's still at the scene. I'm so sorry, Bella." The man, a long-time officer in the department, had been crying.

Bella whispered her thanks then pushed through the crowd, Edward and Mick following closely behind. When they reached the waiting room, Edward wrapped Bella in his arms.

"Take me home, Edward."

The three walked solemnly to the car, and Edward sat in the back seat, holding her, while Mick drove silently. The dark night mirrored Bella's heart, black and wounded beyond healing. She breathed slowly and deeply, wanting only to keep herself together until she reached home. Home had always been where Charlie was; she knew that now. She wondered if anywhere would ever seem like home again.

As they reached the river bridge into Guntersville, Bella saw flashing blue lights surrounding two cars. One was Charlie's cruiser. "Stop the car!"

Mick did not decrease speed as he spoke. "Bella, I don't think that's a good idea."

She looked at Edward pleadingly, and he brushed her cheek with his fingers. "Stop the car, Mick," he said authoritatively, never looking away from her.

Mick sighed, slowing the car and pulling up behind a police car, its blue and white lights shining through the windshield. An officer walked toward them, his hands waving them off until he saw Bella exit the car. He didn't need to speak; the sorrow in his expression said everything. Looking over his shoulder, Bella could see Jackson watching her, and she ran into his open arms.

"Bella," Jackson said, his voice choking with tears, "I'm so sorry. I just can't believe it."

She hugged him tightly, knowing he would grieve for Charlie more than anyone except her. Finally, she pulled away, steeling herself for the conversation to follow. "What the hell happened, Jackson?"

"You know how he is, how he likes to make traffic stops to make sure he can still do it," Jackson said, shaking his head. "He stopped this car here for a broken tail light, and, when he got the guy's license, he called for backup. Said it was the guy Mick's looking for."

Bella gasped. "Phelps?"

Jackson nodded. "I guess the guy figured out what Charlie was doing, and he came out of his car shooting at the cruiser. Charlie never wears a vest, so he had nothing to protect him."

Looking back at Mick's car, Bella could see both Mick and Edward standing on either side, watching her. "Where is Phelps now?"

"We don't know," Jackson said, his voice suddenly hard. "We'll find him, don't you worry about that."

"I know you will, Jackson. I know you will." Bella looked at Charlie's open cruiser door, its window shot out. On the ground where the glass fell, there was a large dark stain, Charlie's life poured out on the pavement.

"Bella?" Jackson's expression was one of concern. "I want you to come stay at our house tonight. I don't think you should be home alone. Tell Mick and Edward to come with you. I think we should all be together tonight."

Bella was puzzled. "How do you know Edward?"

Jackson smiled reluctantly. "Charlie told me all about Edward. He knew you two would end up together again. Told me to make sure Edward treated you right in case he..." Jackson's smile fell as he trailed off.

"I think you're right." Bella took his hand in her own and squeezed. "We all need to be together now. Just let me go change, and I'll meet you there."

Walking slowly to the car, she climbed into the back seat without speaking to Mick or Edward. Their stone faces and clenched fists made it clear they'd heard every word. She leaned against the window, her cheek flush with the cold glass. Closing her eyes, she tried to keep her mind blank until the car came to a stop in front of her house.

The first thing greeting Bella as she walked through the door was Charlie's tackle box, left there after his last fishing excursion. Suddenly, she felt very ill, and she ran up the stairs into her bathroom. She fell to the floor in front of the toilet, barely making it there before vomiting violently. It continued until she was dry heaving, her stomach empty. She could hear Mick and Edward whispering in the hall, but she was grateful they were leaving her alone for now.

Her stomach finally calm, she changed out of her uniform into an old t-shirt and jeans, and slipped her sneakers onto her feet. Realizing she'd need to begin contacting people to tell them the news, she typed and clicked on the computer, printing out her contact list. As she read the names to herself, she wondered how each person would react. Even though Billy Black hadn't seen Charlie in years, they were still close, and he'd be devastated. Bella wasn't even sure she should tell Angela, worried the stress would be bad for the baby. And, Phil, who had never recovered from Renee's death, might not even be able to bring himself to attend the funeral.

The funeral was something Bella hadn't thought of until then. Charlie had helped Phil take care of Renee's, but Bella had been too emotional to know what was done. She was the only one left to take care of Charlie, and she wasn't sure she knew how to do this one last thing for him. She'd left him at the hospital, and she didn't even know where he was now. She hadn't wanted to leave him alone, but Edward promised they'd take care of him. Too many thoughts rushing through her head, she folded up the list, shoving it in her pocket, and walked out onto the balcony.

Standing at the railing, she took in a long, deep breath of cold air and finally let the tears come. They ran down her face, and she lifted her t-shirt to wipe her eyes. Turning to go back into the house, her eyes came to rest on the one lone balcony chair. She had planned to get a matching chair for Charlie on her next day off.

_There's no reason to now. He doesn't need it anymore._

Screaming, Bella lifted the chair high over her head, bringing it down in a crash against the balcony railing. She swung it wildly, creating deep gashes in the walls and breaking many of the French door's windows. Glass crunched under her feet as she swayed back and forth, bringing the chair down again and again.

Cold arms wrapped around her, pinning her arms to her sides. When she dropped the chair, Edward spun her around, and his face was twisted in sorrow.

"I've sat here on this fucking balcony for three years!" Bella screamed, her voice shaky and hoarse. "Three years! And it never occurred to me that he needed a chair! And now..."

Bella collapsed to her knees, sobbing, the world spinning out of control around her. Edward picked her up, cradling her against his chest, and carried her down the stairs to the car, holding her the entire drive to Jackson's house. He didn't let her go until he placed her gently down on the guest bed, and she could feel him stroking her head as Mick, Jackson' wife, and eventually Jackson came to sit around her on the bed's edge.

All night, surrounded by everyone who loved her, she cried for the man who had loved her the most.


	15. Here I Am Without You

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Thank you everyone for your kind reviews of the last chapter - I (heart) you all!****  
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****Breathe Me page with updated playlist:****  
****http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/****  
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****Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:****  
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* * *

**Chapter 15: Here I Am Without You**

Living for eternity, Edward never thought five days could pass so slowly. The sunny days crawled along as he hid in the lodge, counting every second until he could return to her. The dark nights seemed endless as he cradled her, sobbing and crying out for her father, in his arms. He wanted to give her some peace, to take all her pain into himself and feel it for her. Not able to do that, he simply held her.

Each morning before the sun rose, Bella composed herself to face another day without Charlie. Edward was awed by her strength. Although they'd all begged her to let them do it, she called everyone on her list, telling each one gently that Charlie had been killed. Angela was concerned for Bella, asking to speak to Edward briefly to make sure he was taking care of her. Phil surprised Bella by getting his things together and getting in the car to come to Alabama before he even hung up the phone. The hardest call had been the one to Billy; Jacob had to finish the call after Billy let the phone fall to the floor.

They were all in Alabama now, staying at the homes of several Guntersville officers. Edward had purchased plane tickets for the Cheneys and the Blacks, including Jacob's fiance Leah, and they landed in Huntsville a few hours after Phil's little car screeched to a stop in front of Jackson's house. Billy, too distraught over the loss of his best friend, didn't question Edward's presence. The rest viewed him as the idiot who'd finally come to his senses. Everyone supported Bella through the difficult days, and that was more important to Edward than any ill will they bore him.

Mick never said it, but Edward could hear his thoughts. Mick blamed himself for Charlie's death, believing his inability to track down Phelps earlier allowed it to happen. Phelps had gone into hiding, and Mick was pressuring all his contacts for information. In his thoughts, Mick went over the things he'd done to make his contacts talk, and Edward was worried for him.

The night before the funeral, Edward went to Bella's house to retrieve her uniform. He'd been there every night since Charlie died. The first night, he carried a sobbing Bella down the stairs and out to the car. The second night, he put Charlie's tackle box in his closet and began the task of getting the house ready for Bella's return. She would want to come home soon, and things needed to be done.

When he arrived at Jackson's house with the uniform, everyone, including Mick, was in the kitchen. Since Bella had decided against an formal wake, people had come to visit her all day. She could barely stay awake, and dark, purple circles were under her eyes. Picking at a sandwich someone had made for her, she weakly smiled when Edward entered the room. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her eat.

He walked over to her and leaned down to kiss her forehead. "Hello, love. I brought your uniform, just as you asked."

"Thank you, Edward," she said, her eyes watering.

He knelt down next to her chair, taking her hand in his. "Did you eat anything today?"

"She ate a little breakfast and some soup at lunch." The voice belonged to Leah, Jacob's fiance. She and Angela were taking turns feeding the family of mourners.

"I'm not hungry, Edward," Bella whispered, tears beginning to fall down her face. "Can we just go to bed before I..."

Edward stood, scooping Bella up into his arms, and she buried her face in his shoulder. "Yes, let's go. I'm sure everyone understands you need some rest."

Everyone nodded and wished her a good night. They all pretended they hadn't noticed the schedule, but Edward knew their thoughts. It was clear it took all of Bella's strength to get through the day, the endless funeral plans. Once the sun set and Edward was at her side, she surrendered to the dark grief that swallowed her whole every night.

Once they reached the guest bedroom, Edward sat Bella on the bed. When he began to sit next to her, she stopped him.

"Edward, could you ask Mick to come here for a minute?" She wiped the tears from her face as she spoke.

Edward walked out into the hall and called out for Mick, leading him into the room when he arrived. Bella was sitting up on the bed, and she patted the spaces on either side. "Could you two come sit with me, please?"

When they sat down, Bella took their hands in hers. Mick stared down, watching as he stroked the back of their joined hands. Edward clasped Bella's other hand tightly, sensing she was preparing herself to speak. "We're here, Bella. Talk to us," he whispered.

Bella took her and Mick's joined hands and nudged Mick's chin until he looked at her. "Mick, I want you to know that you are in no way to blame for what happened to Dad."

Pain flashed across Mick's face. "Bella..."

"No," she said, more strength in her voice than Edward had heard since Charlie died. "_You_ did not bring Phelps here. _You_ did not make him a murderer. _You_ did not pull the trigger." She released Mick's hand and placed her hand on his cheek. "You were Dad's friend, and he wouldn't want you to feel this way."

"I'm so sorry we haven't found him yet, but we will." Mick's jaw tensed, and his nostrils flared. "I promise."

Bella gently kissed Mick's cheek. "I know we will."

Watching her, so caring and supportive in the midst of her own pain, Edward knew Bella was going to survive this horror. Her heart would never heal, but she would not succumb to the grief. He was still lost in thought when she turned to address him.

"Edward," Bella said, shaking his hand to get his attention, "you need to stop blaming Alice for not seeing what happened."

Edward was confused but quickly realized she must have heard him in the background when she called Mick on the way to the hospital. Edward had talked to Carlisle several times during the last few days, but he'd refused to talk to Alice. Having Bella call him out on his behavior made him instantly ashamed.

Bella kissed his lips softly. "I love you, Edward, but you can be a stubborn ass sometimes."

"Sometimes?" Mick snickered.

Edward sighed as he saw a large, genuine grin spread across Bella's face. "I know. I'll call her tonight."

Bella grabbed their hands again and squeezed them tightly. "Okay. Now that I've straightened out my two favorite guys, I need to get some sleep." Her smile fell, and her momentary strength dissipated. "Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

Mick stood, leaning over to kiss Bella's cheek. "Goodnight, Bells."

Bella gasped, and Edward gaped at Mick, who seemed shocked at his own words.

"Oh, God, Bella, I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that."

Bella grabbed his hand and smiled sadly. "No, it's okay. I like having someone still call me that."

Mick gave her hand a squeeze before turning and walking back into the kitchen.

Bella reclined on the bed, and Edward climbed in behind her and wrapped her in a quilt before enveloping her in his arms. Her breathing was slow and steady, but he knew she wasn't asleep. "Bella?"

"Yes?"

"We couldn't have changed him," Edward whispered shakily. "He was gone when we got there."

Bella turned over to face him, her eyebrows furrowed. "Do you and Mick think I'm mad at you for not turning Dad into a vampire?"

"We weren't sure."

"I would never want you to make that decision for someone else. Just because it's what I want doesn't mean it's what Dad wanted." Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. "I'm not sure Dad would have wanted to live forever without Mom."

Before he could respond, she kissed him, her mouth warm and moving against his. He could feel all her love flow into him, and he pulled her closer, rubbing slow circles on her back. He knew he would never be able to spend another day without her.

Ending the kiss, Bella turned over again, scooting back into a tight spoon in Edward's arms. As she drifted off into a fitful sleep, he thought about what she'd said. She still wanted to be turned. While unexpected, it hadn't shocked him. What shocked him was his reaction. He felt glad. He knew it was wrong, and he didn't care. All his noble, romantic notions of watching Bella grow old and die a natural death ended when he saw Charlie lying dead, Bella crying over him. He didn't want to live forever without her.

***

Bella wasn't sure how long she'd slept, but the room was still dark. Edward wasn't in bed; she could hear him across the room talking to someone on the phone.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm a jerk. I wanted someone to blame, and that wasn't fair to you." He paused, tapping his finger against the window. "Yes, we're going to take care of him. No need to worry about that." He paused again. "Really? That's great Alice. Thank you for telling me." He sighed. "I love you, too. Tell Carlisle and the others the same, okay, Alice?"

Bella heard him press a button on his phone, and she pretended to be asleep.

Edward sat next to her on the bed and brushed her hair out of her face. "I can tell you're not asleep, you know."

"What time is it?" she asked, yawning and stretching.

"It's 6 AM."

Bella sat up, her eyes wide. "You have to go! The sun will be up soon!"

"No, love," Edward said, pulling her toward him. "Alice says it will be cloudy today."

She sighed, sinking into him. "You can go to the funeral." She felt relief wash over her.

"Yes, I can. Now, let's get you something to eat before you have to get dressed." Edward stood, offering her his hand.

Bella took his hand and followed him into the kitchen. Jackson and his wife were already awake, and she sat at the table with them while Edward quickly moved around the room to make her breakfast. At some point, a plate appeared in front of her, and Edward sat watching as she picked at the food with her fork. She paid no attention to what she was eating; every so often she'd spear something and put it in her mouth to chew. It seemed to make everyone at the table happy, so she did it again. Soon, the kitchen was full of people, and each one whispered to Edward before greeting her with a hug or kiss on the cheek.

Swallowing the final mouthful of food, Bella looked around the room and realized she had an audience. "What the hell is everyone staring at?"

Angela, sitting across the table, smiled broadly. "You ate everything."

"Yeah," Bella said slightly irritated, "well, I'm potty trained, too."

Suddenly, Bella guffawed loudly, covering her mouth as she continued to laugh. The room was silent, shock on each person's face, until Angela began to laugh. The tension and sadness lifting for a few moments, the entire gathering erupted into laughter, and the sound was music to Bella's ears. She knew Charlie would have loved hearing it, too.

She looked at Edward, his amber eyes bright and a relieved smile on his face. "I need to get dressed now. It's almost time to go."

Edward nodded, and she returned to the guest room. Her uniform, freshly pressed, was laid on the bed, and her shiny shoes were on the floor. She didn't know who'd taken care of it, but she was grateful to have so many people who cared about her.

She dressed slowly, examining her crisp uniform in the mirror. When she finished, she placed her hat squarely on her head, and memories of her academy graduation flooded back to her. Charlie had been so proud of her that day, and his wide grin was etched in her memory. She promised herself she would be strong today. Charlie's police family was grieving, too, and she wanted to be able to offer them what comfort she could.

The kitchen group arrived at the church before anyone else. The closed casket sat at the altar and was surrounded by countless flower arrangements. The minister, a friendly man with a firm handshake, led Bella and the others to a small room at the back to wait for the funeral to begin. No one spoke, and Bella sat staring out the window, thankful that Alice's vision of a cloudy day had been right. She knew she wouldn't make it through the day without Edward at her side. As if he could read her thoughts, he wrapped his arm around her waist, and she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Finally, the mayor came to lead them into the sanctuary. Bella stood, straightening her uniform jacket and putting on her white dress gloves. Edward straightened her hat and placed his hand on the small of her back. The light touch gave Bella the courage she needed, and she began to follow the mayor.

When she walked into the sanctuary, Bella gasped. The two front rows in the middle section were saved for them, but the rest of the pews were full. People were standing all around the outer edges, taking up any space that wasn't required for walking. Charlie's fellow officers were seated in the front pews of the left and right sections, but Bella could also see many officers, not only from Huntsville and the county but from departments she didn't know. They all stood at attention as she walked to her seat. Looking to her left, she noticed the current police chief from Forks, and she walked over to him, giving him a brief hug, before finally sitting next to Edward.

The funeral was blur. The mayor, the assistant chief of the Guntersville department, and the chief from Forks all spoke eloquently and glowingly. The men were all Charlie's friends, and they were hurting. Still, they were able to tell everyone gathered about his dedication to his job and to his family. He was not a statistic or a badge to the people gathered there. He was a friend, a mentor, a father figure, a brother in blue. Bella's heart swelled with pride, knowing how much her father was loved and respected by the people who served with him and those he served.

When it came time to drive to the cemetery, three large SUVs were waiting to carry Bella and the others in the procession. The vehicles were the only thing Bella agreed to let Edward and Carlisle arrange, and she was glad now she had. Bella, Edward, and Jackson's wife climbed into the back seat of the first SUV, while Jackson decided he would drive and Mick would ride shotgun. The others went to the two remaining vehicles. Finally, the hearse began to move, and the SUVs followed.

Bella, her eyes closed, was sitting with her head on Edward's shoulder when she felt him shake her. "Love, I think you need to look."

Opening her eyes and looking out the window, Bella was astonished. At least one hundred police cruisers were lined up waiting to join the procession. Squad cars from Guntersville, Huntsville, and surrounding cities such as Birmingham and Nashville were there, but there were others. They passed a Forks cruiser, as well as one from the D.C. capital police. There were cars from every state in the southeast, and others from as far away as New York state and the Dakotas. Two Guntersville fire trucks were on either side of the street, their ladders meeting high over the road, and an American flag hung from the joined baskets. Along the road to the cemetery, people lined the streets, some holding flags, others saluting the hearse as it passed. When they reached the cemetery, more mourners lined the road on either side of the gate, and they waved large flags as the procession entered.

To every person she passed, Bella mouthed a silent thank you.

***

Bella stood at the door of her house, her hand resting on the doorknob. The funeral over, she finally convinced Edward and the others she needed time alone; she needed to return to the house she shared with Charlie. She agreed to let Edward maintain vigil in the woods, but she wanted to go inside alone.

Finally opening the door and walking inside, she was relieved Charlie's tackle box was no longer the first thing she saw. She knew Edward had been there, and she was sure he'd moved it. Walking slowly through the house, she tried to remember she would not hear Charlie's footsteps on the floor or his voice calling to her from another room. It made her heart ache.

She climbed the stairs hesitantly, walking into her room to face the destruction she'd left behind. Opening the door, she was shocked to see the balcony's French doors in pristine condition. All its windows had been replaced, and it was freshly painted. Walking onto the balcony, it was also painted, the dents in the railing and the gashes in the wall repaired. Two wicker chairs sat where the mangled metal folding chair had been.

_Edward, how did you do all this?_

She stood on the balcony, the night air cold against her face, searching for Edward in the trees. The leaves were almost all gone now, and the soothing rustle was replaced by the sound of the wind blowing through the branches. She knew the coming winter would be her last here. She didn't want to be in Guntersville without Charlie, and she didn't want to be anywhere without Edward.

Taking in one deep breath to hold back her tears, Bella walked into her bedroom, leaving the balcony doors open. She climbed into bed, turning her face away from the cold breeze blowing through the French doors. Staring at the wall, she tried to will herself to sleep.

She felt the bed shift and cold arms wrap around her. Once he pulled her close, she finally closed her eyes and fell asleep.


	16. I Might Break

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Normally, I just post the playlist song on my profile and the story page on my blog. However, I _REALLY_ want you to listen to this particular version of the song before you read the chapter (the song starts at approximately :38):**

**http://www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=H9ncUQ-Vfjg **

**Please visit the new Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:**

**http://www[dot]twilighted[dot]net/forum/viewtopic[dot]php?f=44&t=6150**

**Also visit the Breathe Me page for an updated playlist:**

**http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/**

**Thank you again for all your wonderful reviews, especially those for the last two chapters.**

* * *

**Chapter 16: I Might Break**

Standing on the balcony, Edward watched the sun rise, it's blazing rays lighting up the sky. He tentatively reached out of the balcony's safe shadows until the sunlight hit his fingertips. The glittering reflection of the sun on his skin made him remember their first day in their meadow and how she'd slowly stroked his hand and called him beautiful.

He wondered how he'd missed it before, her inner strength and resilience, and couldn't remember exactly why he'd ever thought she was so weak. He was the weak one, the one who ran and hid and pretended that he could go on without her. Their last day in the meadow, he'd been cruel and stupid, not understanding that the depth of her love matched his.

Alice's words from their phone call played in an infinite loop in his head.

"You won't hurt her. Remember that."

He ached to ask her what she'd seen, but he didn't want Alice to feel like she was his personal little crystal ball anymore. He simply did as she asked and committed her words to memory.

Even lost in his thoughts, he heard the almost silent shift of the bed and the soft padding of her feet as she walked toward him. He shivered as she wrapped her warm arms around his waist and hugged him tightly.

"Good morning," Bella whispered, kissing the center of his back.

He ran his fingers slowly back and forth over her arms. "Good morning, love."

Slowly turning around in her arms, he reached down, tilting her head up toward him. He kissed her gently, and, when she didn't reciprocate, he was confused. "What's wrong?"

She covered her mouth with her hand and blushed. "Morning breath."

_Oh, I'm really going to miss that blush._

"Yes, well, I really couldn't care less about that," he said, the corner of his mouth curling up into a smile.

Pulling her hand down, he kissed her again, and she returned it with full force. He struggled to maintain control as she parted her lips and tilted her head, leaving her mouth open for exploration. Moving one hand to cup the back of her head, his other hand moved to the small of her back and pressed her into him. Their lips and tongues moved together, desperately feeling and tasting.

Bella pulled back, gasping. Her hand began slowly stroking a path up and down the center of his still chest. "Breathe," she whispered.

"I can't," he said, covering her hand with his. "I won't be able to control myself, and now is not the time..."

"I need to finally be yours," she said, her eyes dark. "And I need you to finally be mine."

He bowed his head, kissing her forehead. "After everything that's happened, I couldn't bear it if I hurt you."

"You won't hurt me."

Alice's words, forgotten in the fog of Bella's kisses, rushed back to him. This was what she'd seen.

Bella raised herself on her tiptoes, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "Edward," she whispered, her lips gently brushing his earlobe, "breathe. Please."

With a sigh, he ran his fingers through her silken hair, tugging gently to tilt her head and expose her porcelain skin. Gently kissing along her jaw, he buried his face into the crook of her neck, taking one long, ragged breath.

The searing pain that began at his nostrils moved quickly into his lungs and throughout his body. It was a blaze burning brightly, and, as he continued to breathe, it raged unceasingly. She smelled everything like the girl he left in Forks and nothing like her all at once. The sweet scent of strawberry was gone now, completely replaced by more complex aromas he'd smelled before: ripe peaches and something green and crisp he still couldn't name. However, her essence was the same; the same irresistible scent of her blood permeated everything.

The flames began to die down, leaving behind charred, glowing embers that could spark into a uncontainable wildfire if he wasn't careful. He remembered Alice's words and his own internal promise to give Bella whatever she wanted.

Bella moaned as he kissed her neck, quickly flicking his tongue over the pulsing vein there. Reaching down, he lifted her, carrying her over the balcony threshold and to the bed. Laying down, she motioned for him to follow, and he climbed in next to her.

"Bella," he whispered, his fingers ghosting down her side and over her hip, "I've haven't been with anyone else."

He'd specifically asked Alice not to tell him about other men, so he wasn't sure if there had been someone else in her life. In the end, it didn't matter. Still, he wanted her to know that, for him, there had been no one else.

A shy grin lit up Bella's face. "I haven't either. I waited for you."

He pulled her toward him, hungry for her mouth, her taste, her body underneath his hands. Rolling onto his back, he brought her with him, kissing her deeply as she lay on top of him. He ran his hands up and down her back, finally wrapping his fingers around the soft curves of her hips and pressing his hard length against her. Gasping, she pulled back, her eyes wide. She sat up, straddling his hips, and the pressure of her weight bearing down on him made him moan.

He wanted to see her, every inch of her, and he slipped his hands under her shirt, lifting it up to expose her stomach. Smiling, she slowly peeled off the shirt, dropping it to the floor. Enraptured, he watched as she reached around and unclasped her bra, letting it slowly fall down her arms before she dropped it to the floor as well.

Slowly rising and falling with her breath, her breasts were round and full, and he reached up, cupping his hands around the outer swell on each side. His thumbs brushed across the pale pink flesh of her nipples, and he watched in awe as it darkened and puckered against his cold fingers while she moaned quietly.

"So beautiful," he whispered, sitting up and kissing her neck.

She pulled back slightly, tugging his shirt. Reluctantly, he released her, raising his hands high above his head and allowing her to undress him. Wrapping his arms around her again, they were finally skin against skin, and she shivered.

"Are you too cold?" he whispered as he placed gentle kisses along her collarbone and between her breasts.

"No," she replied, her voice breathy, "I've just never touched you...I've never touched anyone like this."

He felt her fingers thread though his hair and slowly massage his scalp. Brushing his cheek against her breast, he turned his head and took her nipple into his mouth, making languid circles around it with his tongue. Her arms encircled his neck, freeing his hands to explore her. The fingers of one hand pinched and tugged the nipple not in his mouth, while his other hand moved slowly underneath the waistband at the back of her jeans.

Each new inch of her skin tasted better than the last, and he knew he would never be sated. His ache for her wasn't satisfied by the contact or the knowledge that he would soon completely claim her. The ache only increased, filling him body and soul with its pain. Looking into her eyes, he could see she felt it, too. They were meant to be together like this, and he realized he'd been a fool, fighting destiny for far too long.

Grabbing Bella around the waist, he turned them over again and stood up next to the bed. He buttoned and unzipped her jeans, watching as she lifted her hips and pushed her jeans and panties over her hips and down her legs. Kicking the clothes to the floor, she turned to her side, blushing wildly as Edward undressed and stood naked before her.

Edward laughed loudly, brushing his fingertips against her hot cheeks. "Why is it you blushed when I undressed and not when you did?"

"Well, I've seen _me_ naked." She grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the bed.

Lying next to her, he could see the trepidation in her eyes, and he cradled her face in his hands. "Are you nervous?" he whispered.

"A little," she admitted. "How much will it hurt?"

"I don't know, but I'll be as gentle as I can." He brushed his lips against hers and felt her shiver again.

Nestled between her legs, his weight resting on his forearms, he rained kisses over her face, neck, and shoulders before returning his attention to her breasts. The beautiful pink blush of her cheeks had spread over her chest, and she writhed underneath him as his mouth played more roughly with her nipples. The sounds she made, deep moans and desperate gasps, were new to his ears and aroused him in ways he hadn't known before.

He froze when he felt her warm fingers wrap around his length and begin stroking tentatively. So lost in what he was doing to her, he hadn't noticed her shift to reach him. Gazing up at her face, he saw a look of want and determination. Her chocolate eyes were dark and molten, and she bit her lip in concentration. He closed his eyes, trying to block out every sensation but that of her hand caressing him.

Reluctantly, he pulled away and moved down her body, finally resting his head on her hip. He grazed his fingers over her swollen, wet lips then eased one finger between them, gently sliding it inside her. His movements were slow and deliberate; he waited until her hips met his hand insistently before he added a second finger. She gasped loudly, but soon she was bucking underneath him again. Finally, he watched himself slowly slide three fingers inside her and felt her body stretch to take him.

"Oh, God," she moaned breathlessly. Her hips were making small thrusts to meet those of his hand, and she was slick with her arousal.

Unable to resist any longer, he lowered his mouth to her, taking one long lap of her before his tongue met her swollen clit. She convulsed at the contact, and he began making slow circles around it. This new taste made his head swim, and he greedily consumed her. Her breathing was fast and ragged, and she grabbed his hair to press him into her closer. When he heard her heartbeat become impossibly fast, he pulled away from her.

"Why did you stop?" Her voice was shrill and her eyebrows furrowed.

He moved back up her body, resting his lips against her ear. "When I make you come the first time, I don't want it to be around my fingers."

"Oh," she sighed.

Burying his face in her hair, he slid his length against her, bathing himself in her wetness before pressing gently against her. He stared deeply into her eyes, and he gasped at the love he saw there, praying she could see the same in his.

"Promise me you'll tell me if it hurts," he whispered.

"I promise," she said, wrapping her legs his waist.

He entered her slowly, her tight, wet body almost burning him with her heat. Every inch was a new victory. Her whimpers made him pause, and they waited for the discomfort to pass and the pleasure return before moving again. Just as it seemed to get easier, he felt a new resistance inside her.

"Are you ready, love?" He couldn't hide the concern in his voice.

She placed her hands on either side of his face, kissed him softly, and leaned to meet his forehead with hers. "Yes, baby, I'm ready."

He thrust quickly, breaking the final barrier between them. She cried out in pain, digging her fingers into his scalp. Her breathing, quickening from the pain, began to slow as the pain subsided.

Every muscle in his body was taut and unmoving. The smell of her blood was so strong it threatened to overwhelm him. Every instinct he had screamed to bite her, to drink her until there was nothing left. He was afraid to move. At first a whisper, his love broke through the haze, chanting insistently.

_You won't hurt her. You won't hurt her._

"Edward?" she asked, quivering. "Talk to me. Are you alright?"

Smiling, he kissed her. "I am now."

He pressed once more, entering her completely, and began to slowly pull away. Their bodies, once parted, yearned for reunion, and he filled her again and again. What began as slow, hesitant movements quickly became faster, frenzied thrusts as they clutched each other desperately. Letting her set the pace, he matched his speed to the rocking of her hips, moving deeper and harder when she begged him for it. Even as he restrained himself, he could feel the pressure building inside, and he didn't want to come without her. He lowered his hand, stroking her in rhythm with their bodies crashing together.

"Swear to me," she whispered, tears falling from her almost closed eyes, "swear to me that you'll never leave me again."

So beautiful and vulnerable, her pleading voice wounded him. He knew the doubt was his fault. "Never again, Bella. Never again."

Kissing her tears away, his fingers continued to bring her closer to the precipice. He wanted to make her forget everything but how they felt, joined together in that moment. Her breaths became pants, her heart pounding in her chest. She arched her back, and he thrust deep inside her as she watched her come apart, her body clenching and throbbing around him.

Staring down at her, her eyes wide and her lips calling his name, he knew what it had all been for. All the pain he felt, all the pain he'd inflicted, the loss of his eternal soul had been for her. He'd cursed his own existence, but, feeling the completeness of being inside her, he was thankful.

Bella's voice, small and breathy, broke him out of his daze. "Come for me, Edward. Please."

Pushing deep inside her quivering body, her begging sent him over the edge, and he exploded inside her, spasms sending exquisite waves of pleasure throughout his body. Moaning her name, he weakly held himself over her, finally pulling away and lying next to her once his orgasm was over.

A huge satisfied smirk spread across Bella's face. "Not too bad for a newbie, huh?"

Laughing, Edward brushed her damp hair out of her eyes. "I guess I could ask you the same thing." He paused, examining her body for any damage. "Was the pain very bad?"

"No," she said meekly. "I'm just a little sore."

"Someday we won't have to be so careful." He watched her face anxiously as it lit up in understanding.

She took his hand, threading her fingers in his. "Someday soon?"

"If that's what you want."

He pulled her into his embrace, kissing her softly. They lay together, kissing, exploring each other, until Bella sighed and pulled away.

"I've got to take a shower," she said, getting up from the bed and walking into her bathroom. "I have to meet Jackson at the station."

Edward sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "Can you wait until the sun goes down? Then I can go with you."

The shower was running, and her voice was muffled by the glass door. "No, I can't. Jackson is expecting me. I want to give him Dad's shotgun."

He heard a small sniffle and knew she was crying. Mixed in the steam with her heady scent was the familiar crisp, green aroma. "Love, what kind of soap are you using?"

"Cucumber, why?"

He walked to the bathroom doorway, taking a deep breath knowing he safely could. "Can I join you?"

The glass door of the shower creaked open revealing a naked and soaking Bella. His jaw dropped, and he couldn't take his eyes off the water cascading down her body.

"I'd love that," she said, laughing, "but we both know what would happen. And I'm just too sore to fuck right now."

"Bella!" Edward gasped.

She shut the shower door, giggling behind it. "Don't worry. I figure I'll be good to go again tonight."

Edward walked back to the bedroom, shaking his head and pulling on his boxer briefs and jeans. He knew he probably needed a shower, too, but he wanted her scent to remain on his skin until she was back in his arms. He went out and sat on the balcony, listening to the dual sounds of the trees swaying in the wind and Bella moving through her human moments. He even heard the faint sounds of her moving the shotgun he'd seen under her bed.

She finally came out onto the balcony and sat in the chair next to him. Her eyes always on the swaying trees, she reached out for his hand, and he complied. They sat in silence, listening to the sounds of the world around them, and he understood why she felt such peace there.

"I'm going to miss this when we leave," she whispered. "I wish I'd spent more time with Dad here."

Edward squeezed her hand. "I know, love. We'll find somewhere you can feel this peace."

"When will we be able to go back to Forks?"

"I don't know, maybe 75 years." He squeezed her hand again. "I know it seems like I long time now, but it will pass quickly, you'll see."

Releasing his hand, she stood up, wiping tears from her face. "I need to meet Jackson before he starts to worry." She leaned down, kissing the top of his head. "Stay here. I'll be home soon."

He tilted his head up to capture her lips with his, resisting the urge to pull her down into his lap and make her stay. Their kiss, soft and loving, ended too soon. "I love you," he whispered.

She rested her hand against his cheek. "I know. I love you, too."

He felt her hand slip away as she walked into the bedroom, picking up the shotgun and leaving. He listened to her footsteps and movements until her truck was far away. Turning to watch the sun and the trees, he rubbed his fingers against his still tingling and smiling lips.


	17. Focus on the Pain

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Thank you again for the wonderful reviews for the last chapter! This will probably be my longest A/N ever.**

This chapter includes an homage to my favorite scene in one of my favorite movies. You can find a video of it, as well as an updated playlist, on the Breathe Me page:  
http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/

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**onepushyfox and I have joined forces to write a new Twilight AU story, In The Blood, which has been posted on FFn:  
http://www[dot]fanfiction[dot]net/s/5441647/1/In_The_Blood**

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**Chapter 17: Focus on the Pain**

Standing outside the double glass doors of the police station, Bella's stomach churned as she realized this would be the last time she'd visit her home away from home. Even if she were staying in Alabama, she wouldn't be able to walk through the doors knowing Charlie would not be sitting in the chief's office. Fighting off tears, she went inside.

Sitting at the front desk was a young, doe-eyed redhead. She was a college freshman, studying criminal justice with plans to become an officer. Bella had hand-picked the young woman when she gave up the job to go to the academy.

"Hello, Bella," she said, sadly. "I'm so sorry about Chief Swan."

"Thank you, Julie." Bella looked around the station slowly. "Where's Detective Glenn?"

"He's back in the conference room. I'll page him," Julie said, reaching for the phone.

Bella began walking toward the back of the station. "That's okay. I'll just walk back there and find him."

As she walked around the corner into the sea of officer cubicles, Bella heard Jackson's voice booming from the conference room. She walked to the doorway, and Jackson and several other detectives were crowded around a large monitor watching a grainy video and taking notes. After a few seconds, the familiar timbre of Charlie's voice came through the speakers, and Bella froze.

"I've got him stopped on the bridge," Charlie's voice explained. "You need to send backup right...wait! Sir, step back into the vehicle!"

Three shots rang out, and the right side of the windshield shattered. Bella couldn't see Charlie, but she could see Phelps walking toward the cruiser, his gun pointed. Charlie was offscreen, having exited the cruiser, and returned fire. Phelps ducked then stood up, shooting twice more. Charlie let out a loud grunt, and Bella knew he'd been hit. Phelps walked around to Charlie's side of the cruiser, and, off camera, two more shots were fired. Charlie's groaning stopped.

"Oh my God, he shot him point blank!" Bella cried.

Everyone in the room spun around, mouths gaping. Jackson ran over to her as another detective struggled to stop the video. Bella, tears streaming down her face, collapsed into Jackson's arms, and he helped her over to the nearest chair. As the last detective leaving the room passed him, Jackson howled, "Telling fucking Julie she's fucking fired!"

"No, no," Bella said weakly, "she tried to page you, and I just walked off on my own. Don't fire her."

Jackson grimly nodded and waved the waiting detective away. "Bella, I'm sorry you saw that. As painful as it is, we have to watch the dashcam and make our report to the ABI. You understand, don't you?"

Wiping away her tears, she patted his shoulder. "I know. It's your job. I understand. What I don't understand is why Phelps gunned him down like that. Dad was wounded, and that bastard just stood over him and killed him."

"At the beginning of the tape, when Charlie asks Phelps for his ID, Charlie noticed the girl in the car. I think that's what sent everything straight to Hell." He wiped his hand slowly over his face. "When Charlie radioed back, he said the girl didn't look good."

Bella's fists were clenched tightly, and she could feel her nails cutting into the soft flesh of her palm. "Tell me you're going to catch him."

Jackson, who never raised his voice and never cursed, clenched his jaw tightly. "If it's the last fucking thing I do, I swear."

Standing, Bella loosened her fist and began to put her hand on his cheek. She paused when she noticed blood oozing out of the small crescents her nails had caused. Instead, she punched him lightly on the shoulder. "Will you help me with Dad's things?"

"Why don't we put that off another day or two? Come back when Edward can come with you."

Swallowing more tears, Bella walked toward the door, motioning Jackson to follow. "No, today. I don't think I'll ever be able to walk in here again."

Silently, they walked to Charlie's office, where most of his things were packed in a large box sitting in his old chair. Bella thumbed through the contents, looking at pictures of Charlie with her, with Billy and Jacob, and with the men and women he led in Forks and Guntersville. Her favorite picture was a large photo of Charlie beaming proudly next to her at her academy graduation; she was going to make sure it had a special place wherever she and Edward moved. As she and Jackson double-checked the office to make sure everything was packed, Bella found, peeking out from underneath the leather desk mat, one last photo.

Turned upside down, the words "Happy Bella" were written in Charlie's messy script on the back of the photo. Bella turned it over and gasped. It was a picture of Edward and her at prom, Edward smiling his crooked smile and Bella grinning through her grimace despite herself. In his purge when he left Forks, Edward hadn't cleared Charlie's office, and Bella had never known Charlie kept this one last memento. Lost in wonder, Bella jumped when Jackson spoke.

"He hated what Edward did to you when he left, but he knew it was only a matter of time before Edward would be back. He said you were both too happy together to stay apart."

Bella slipped the picture between two packed frames. "He really was just a big softy inside, wasn't he?" She smiled, her eyes filling with tears.

"Yep, he was," Jackson said, kissing Bella on the cheek. "Let me carry this to the truck for you. It's pretty heavy."

As Jackson left the office, Bella stayed behind taking one last look around Charlie's office. The desk phone rang, and, out of habit, Bella snatched it up and held it to her ear.

"Guntersville Police Department. How may I direct your call?"

"Um, yeah," a deep, shaky voice replied. "I have some information on the guy that shot that cop last week."

Bella took in a long, deep breath, going over the options in her head. Finally, after a few seconds, she grabbed a chewed pen and notepad off the desk. "Yes, sir, I can take that information."

"Yeah, well, I kinda wanted to talk to a cop, ya' know." The caller sounded confused.

"I am a police officer, sir, and I can take your information and pass it on to the detective in charge."

"Well, okay then. Phelps has a lab off 79, in that last house on Market Road. He's headed over there to get some product for a deal he's doing tonight. He's gonna use the cash to get out of town with the little girl." The caller paused to breath. "Is that all you need?"

Scribbling Phelps's location on the notepad, Bella tore the sheet off the pad and pushed it into her pocket. "Yes, sir, that's all we need. Thank you very much."

"Um, yeah." The line went dead.

Bella hung up the phone and walked quickly toward the double doors of the station. As she reached out to push the door open, Jackson pulled it from the outside.

"Bella? Are you okay?" Jackson opened the door and stood aside to allow her to exit.

"I'm great," Bella said breathlessly. "I'll see you tonight at dinner, okay?"

Not waiting for Jackson's answer, Bella dashed to her truck and climbed into the cab. She took the paper out of her pocket and read it over and over again, trying to formulate a plan as she focused on the words. She knew exactly where the house was located, and it sat at the edge of the woods, giving her plenty of cover as she approached the house. Finally, she made her decision, started the truck, and drove toward Market Road.

_He was _my_ father, and I will take care of this._

Driving with calm determination, Bella made her way through downtown and toward Market Road. Making the turn onto the road from Country Road 79, Bella pulled her truck into a path through the woods at the road side. She jumped from the cab, grabbing Charlie's shotgun and her badge. She walked slowly through the woods, staying alert for any minions Phelps might have watching the area. Approaching the back of the house, she was relieved to find only one car parked in the driveway.

She tiptoed to the kitchen window and slowly raised her head to look inside. A man sat at the table, shoving packaged product and rolls of money into a backpack. When he stood and turned, she could see the face of the man she'd seen in the dashboard video. He zipped up his backpack, throwing it over one shoulder, and walked through the house toward the front door. Crouching down, Bella crawled around the house and leaned against the wall next to the front door. The adrenaline was pouring into her bloodstream, and her heart began racing. She breathed deeply and deliberately, steadying herself for the confrontation.

The moment she left the station without reporting Phelps' location to Jackson, she knew what she would do. She had never been more certain of anything. Becoming a cop, telling Mick her story, even reopening her heart to Edward – none of these had been as crystal clear in her mind as what she was going to do right now. Every muscle, every nerve, every cell in her body was ready.

She wondered if this was anything like the bloodlust Edward experienced, because she wanted Phelps' blood, all of it.

In a pool.

On the ground.

Just like Charlie's had been.

Phelps opened the front door, and he was immediately knocked backward by the sharp impact of the shotgun's stock against the middle of his face. Blood began streaming from his nose down the front of his faded t-shirt, and he fell to his knees. As he howled in pain, Bella coolly walked through the door, quickly pulling back the gun's forestock and pointing the barrel directly between his eyes.

He threw his backpack at her feet. "You want the meth? The money? Here, take it!"

"You stupid motherfucker," Bella snarled, "I don't want your shit."

"Who are you then? What the hell do you want?"

Bella clenched her jaw as she placed her finger on the trigger just as Charlie had taught her. "I want my father back, you son of a bitch!"

***

Having waited all morning to hear from Edward or Bella, Mick couldn't wait any longer. He drove to the house and loudly knocked on the door. He was surprised when Edward, disheveled and pulling a black t-shirt over his head, answered the door.

"Why hello there, Mick," Edward said, smiling broadly. "How are you this fine day?"

"Not as good as you are, apparently." Mick entered the house, Edward holding the door open for him. As he passed Edward, he wrinkled his nose. "Dude, you reek."

Edward took a long, deep whiff of his arm. "Really? I kinda like it."

The pieces clicked together in Mick's brain, and he spun around, eyes wide and mouth gaping. "Did our little Eddie finally become a man?"

"Mick, a gentleman never tells." Edward grinned, nodding up and down in confirmation.

"Well, I'd give you a big hug, but you really do stink. It's a good thing I'm the only vampire around, or I wouldn't be the only one who knew what you kids were up to last night." Mick walked into the kitchen and sat in his regular chair at the table. "Where is Bella, by the way?"

A cell phone began to ring in the background, and Edward walked toward the sound. "She went to see Jackson. That's probably her now."

Mick looked around the kitchen, remembering the nights he sat here with Bella and Charlie. He and Charlie had become good friends, and Mick still blamed himself for Charlie's death. Mick worried that, if he'd spent more time looking for Phelps and less time interfering in Bella and Edward's love life, Charlie would still be alive. Still, seeing Bella and Edward so happy together, he couldn't regret what he'd done for them. Both Bella and Beth assured him the blame was not his to bear, but he still wasn't sure. Even though he couldn't bring Charlie back, he often wondered if there were something, anything he could to make things better for Bella. She was, after all, the one hurt worst in this whole mess, and Mick never forgot it.

"Alice, what are you saying? Where is she?" Edward's scream bellowed through the house.

Knocking his chair to the floor, Mick dashed up the stairs, finding Edward in Bella's room. The terror on Edward's face instantly made Mick's stomach tie in knots. "What's going on?"

"You talk to her," Edward said, handing him the phone.

"Hello?"

"Yes, Mick, this is Alice," said the tiny voice. "I need you to calm Edward down. Bella's gone after Phelps, and she'll kill him if you don't get there and stop her."

Mick's jaw tightened, and his free hand reached out to grab Edward's shoulder. "Tell me where she is."

Alice sighed. "Market Road is all I can see. Does that help?"

"I know exactly where that is. He's got a lab there."

"Thank you, Mick." Alice paused, and voices were chattering nervously in the background. "Go, hurry. She'll never forgive herself if she kills him."

"I'm leaving now," Mick said disconnecting the call.

Mick walked out of the room and jumped from the landing to the first floor below. Before he could reach the front door, he heard a second set of feet land on the floor behind him. He turned slowly to see Edward, standing at the foot of the stairs and pulling on a black hoodie.

"You know you can't go," Mick said apologetically. "It's daylight."

Edward jerked the sleeves over his hands and lifted the hood over his head. "There's no fucking way I'm staying behind. I'll hide in the back seat. Don't even try to stop me."

Mick shook his head, knowing they didn't have time for an argument. Reluctantly, he waved Edward toward him, and they ran to Mick's car. Jumping into the driver's seat, Mick watched Edward climb into the back seat and crouch down as best he could in the limited space. Even a brief uncovering of Edward's hand as he reached for the door handle had glimmered wildly, and Mick hoped no one would be outside the house to see them when they arrived. He started the car and drove toward Market Road.

After a few tense minutes, the car slid to a stop in front of the small house. As soon as they were out of the car, Mick and Edward could smell the stench of recently cooked meth, and they heard the unmistakable sound of a round being fed into a pump action shotgun. Bella's voice rang out over the trees.

"I want my father back, you son of a bitch!"

Before Mick could move, Edward was running. Following closely behind, he saw Edward jump onto the porch and freeze at the doorway. Mick could smell the blood, making it clear the situation was already well out of hand.

Edward slowly approached Bella. "Bella, love, don't do this."

Bella didn't flinch. "Edward, leave. Now. I have this under control." Her voice was icy and impersonal.

Mick slowly entered the house and moved to stand at Bella's side opposite Edward. He could see that she was completely engulfed by her anger, and he wasn't sure anything he said could stop her. "You don't want to do this. Taking a human life, even this one, is something you don't want on your conscience. It will eat you alive."

Glaring at him, she almost growled when she spoke. "You didn't see the dashcam. I did. He _executed_ my father. Did you know that?" Bella snapped her eyes back to the whimpering man on his knees before her. "An eye for an eye."

Mick examined Bella's stance closely. He knew if he grabbed the shotgun, her finger tight against the trigger, she'd likely fire the one shot she needed. He'd never felt so helpless. It was as if he were watching someone getting ready to jump off a cliff, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He looked at Edward pleadingly, not knowing what to do. Edward's eyes were alight with determination.

Edward slowly moved behind Bella and leaned toward her ear. "Bella, love, this isn't what Charlie would have wanted," he whispered.

"It's what I want." Tears were welling up in her eyes.

"You think if you kill him, you'll stop hurting. But you won't." Edward placed his hand lightly on her shoulder. "You'll just be left knowing you betrayed everything Charlie stood for, everything you swore to be when you became a cop. Don't let him take that away from you."

Bella stood still for several long moments before large, wet tears began falling down her face. Her hands shaking, Bella slowly lowered her gun, handed it to Mick, and turned to face Edward.

"You'll need to take him in. I don't think I can do it."

Edward nodded, and Bella walked past him and out of the house. Mick and Edward looked down at Phelps, who was cowering in the floor, bleeding and smelling of urine. Mick grabbed him by the left arm and lifted him roughly.

Without a gun pointed in his face, Phelps straightened his back and puffed his chest in a show of misplaced courage. "What the fuck was that? That stupid bitch broke my nose! That's police fucking brutality, that's what that is! You watch, I ain't done nothin'! When I get out, I'm going to find that cunt and fuck her up!"

Mick heard a quick, sick ripping sound, and Phelps went limp, slumping into a pile to the floor. Confused, Mick's gaze followed Phelps' falling body. Blood was quickly pooling around his feet, the stream parting to pass his boots only to meet again at the other side. Looking at Edward, Mick saw wide, inky black eyes and a blood-spattered face staring back at him.

In his shaking hands, Edward was holding Phelps' still beating heart.


	18. Broken in Your Hands

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.__  
_  
**A/N: Breathe Me page with updated playlist:****  
****http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/****  
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**Chapter 18: Broken in Your Hands**

Pressing the button to disconnect his call, Mick shoved his cellphone into his jacket pocket. He was furious with Edward for what he'd done. Walking onto the porch, he motioned Bella toward him.

"Edward needs you."

She started to run into the house, but Mick grabbed her wrist and pulled her to a stop.

"Bella," he whispered, "Edward's killed him."

"What?" The shock was evident on her face, and she tried to jerk away from him and continue into the house.

"Listen to me," he said brusquely, pulling her back toward him. "It's a mess in there. You need to be prepared."

When she nodded slowly, Mick let her go. She stepped into the doorway and looked around the room, gasping at the sight. He could see her take a deep, steadying breath then walk toward Edward, who was crouched in a corner on the far wall of the room. She lowered herself in front of him and gently smoothed his hair away from his blood-splattered face. Raising his gaze from the floor to her face, Edward's eyes were the darkest amber and full of fear. Even in the midst of so much horror, the love between them was palpable, and the intimacy of their stare made Mick consider looking away.

"Edward, what happened?" Bella whispered, cradling his face between her hands.

Swallowing hard, Edward began to speak. "Remember the men in Port Angeles? How terrible their thoughts had been? His was worse."

"I don't know what you saw," Mick said, irritated, "but he would have been in jail. He wouldn't have been able to hurt her."

"He wasn't going to do it." Edward continued to look at Bella, as if his only concern was explaining it to her. "He was going to hire someone to do it while he was in jail. Someone that would wait months to get their chance at you. Killing you would have been the least of what he had planned."

"Thank you," Bella said, tears streaming down her face. "Are you okay?"

Her thanks had cleared Edward's eyes of their fear, and he sighed. "I'm fine. It's not the first time I've killed for you."

Mick's fury lessened slightly; he knew he'd kill anyone who planned to harm Beth. Still there was the issue to which neither Edward nor Bella seemed to have given any thought. "Edward, I understand what you did." Mick spoke slowly, trying to mask his anger. "But, while you two were going all _Natural Born Killers_ on me, did you think about Annie? How will we find her with Phelps dead?"

His question broke through their haze, and Edward and Bella looked at him intently, speaking in unison.

"Alice."

Just then, Edward's cell phone rang in his hoodie pocket. "Bella, love, can you reach in and get that for me?"

Bella retrieved the phone and answered without looking at the caller ID, putting the phone immediately on speaker. "Alice?"

"Bella? Bella, is that you?" The tiny voice on the speaker was a mixture of elation and relief. "Thank God they found you! What happened?"

Mick's confidence in her help deflated. "I thought she could see everything?"

"Oh, I'm on speaker," Alice said. "I can't see spur of the moment decisions. The last thing I saw, after I talked to you last, was Edward talking Bella down."

"I killed him, Alice." Edward's voice was matter of fact. "Now we need to figure out where the girl is."

"Yes, well, I see." Alice's voice drifted off into silence.

As the silence continued, Mick tapped his foot impatiently on the wood floor. Edward and Bella glared at him, and he stopped. He had to admit, he was duly impressed by Edward's physical strength and his determination to protect Bella. Mick had certainly done his share of killing to protect the woman he loved. He worried, though, that his main goal in coming to Alabama, finding Annie, would never be fulfilled. He wasn't sure he could face Annie's mother or himself if he failed. Looking at Edward again, Mick saw Edward's glare had softened into something apologetic and understanding, washing away Mick's anger. Mick shrugged meekly, communicating to Edward silently.

_I know you didn't mean to get us in this mess, Edward. I only hope Alice can help us._

As if on cue, Alice sighed. "The three of you go to this older, two-story house. It's near some woods, and it's in shades of rose and violet, like an old Victorian."

Mick knew the house; he was certain of it. "Does it have a porch swing?"

"Yes," Alice said excitedly, "it does. You know it, then? There's a older lady there, and she's trying to keep the three of you out of the house. The girl is screaming in the background. Maybe from the upstairs."

Before Mick could say anything, Edward looked at him in horror. "It's his mother's house?" he gasped.

Mick nodded solemnly in response. "She hasn't always been there. I've been there several times."

"No, she hasn't," Alice explained. "She'll tell you that when you get her. The old woman isn't hurting her; she feels some pity. She didn't know where they were until tonight. Everything will be okay, so you can wait until the Cleaner leaves."

"Thank you, Alice," Mick said sincerely.

"You're very welcome. Oh, and Edward? Call Carlisle before you do anything else, okay?"

Edward's head dropped. "Yes, Alice. Thank you."

"Goodbye," Alice chirped, and the call ended.

Bella looked back and forth between the men. "Mick, who's the Cleaner? And Edward?" She snapped her head toward him. "What's Alice talking about?"

Once his mind processed what happened, Mick knew they'd need help. Edward had been practically hysterical, ready to grab Bella and run as fast as he could with her. It took Mick several minutes to explain it wasn't necessary. The Cleaner in L.A. was very familiar with Mick and his predicaments, and she quickly put him in contact with the local Cleaner in Huntsville. He'd arrive any minute, although he wouldn't be happy with what he found.

"The Cleaner will take care of this problem," Mick said, gesturing toward Phelps' bloodless body. "It will be as if it never happened. He will be here soon, and, once he lets us leave, we can get Annie."

Standing, Bella's eyebrows knitted together in confusion. "Let's just go now. What are we waiting for?"

"Bella," Edward whispered, "I need cleaning, too." He stood, bringing his blood-coated hands in front of him. Once he came to his feet, it was easier to see that he was soaked with blood from the center of his chest down to his feet. "Mick, I'm not sure how much longer I can bear this. Will he be here soon?"

Bella pulled Edward's hoodie off and began lifting his shirt. "Mick, have you lost your mind? You know this is torture for him!"

Mick walked to her side and gently pried her fingers away from Edward's shirt. "I know. But anything we do could spread the blood and make the Cleaner's job harder. Even washing his hands will mean the sinks and drains will be contaminated. Do you understand?"

"He's absolutely right," a deep male voice bellowed from the doorway. "But don't worry, dear. We're here now."

The tall vampire, his skin a warm walnut and his hair jet black, looked as if he stepped out of a Bollywood movie. His muscular build was hugged by tight pants and shirt, which were made from the same shiny black PVC as his long trenchcoat and his gloves. He wore heavy black boots that pounded loudly as he entered the house. He was followed by several men, all vampires and dressed similarly, who spread out around the room. The man, obviously the Cleaner, smiled brightly at Mick, who suddenly realized he knew the strange creature.

"Ameretat, my friend," Mick said, extending his hand to the Cleaner as he walked toward him.

The Cleaner shook Mick's hand firmly. "Mick St. John! I should have known an Alabama vampire wouldn't have gotten into such trouble. How is the retail blood treating you?"

Mick noticed the cleaning crew wrapping Phelps' body in a large tarp, and he was glad the heart hadn't fallen out onto the floor. Edward had placed it back into the hole in the chest, hoping Bella would not have to know the true extent of his violence. "Good, good," Mick said, returning his attention to the Cleaner. "So, you're the Cleaner when you're not dealing blood?"

The Cleaner laughed loudly. "As I said, Alabama vampires don't normally get into such trouble. My cleaning duties leave a lot of time for other pursuits. Give me your shoes, and I'll make sure they're spotless."

Mick took off his shoes, handing them to the Cleaner. He instructed Bella to hand over her shoes as well, and once she did, he led her into the kitchen, careful not to step into blood. They sat at the small table and watched as the cleaning crew went about their duties. Two men brought in a large black, plastic bag and asked Edward to step into it. They lifted it up over Edward's body and asked him to remove his bloody shoes and clothes. Once he was naked, they handed him a robe and led him outside.

"Where are they taking him?" Bella asked nervously.

Mick rested his hand gently on her shoulder. "To one of their trucks to spray him down. Then they can take the water away to dispose of it."

The other men flitted around the room, quickly removing all traces of death. As they began cleaning the floor, Edward returned, his hair wet and dressed in new clothes. He carried Mick's and Bella's shoes to them. The Cleaner followed closely behind, handing Bella a large, wet cloth.

"Here, dear," he crooned. "You have a little blood on your hands. You can go now. We'll finish up here. We may have to replace part of the floor if the blood soaked too far into the wood, and that could take a while."

Mick stood, clapping his hand loudly on the Cleaner's shoulder. "Thank you, Ameretat. But, the body. We don't want the police to think he's still at large."

Taking the bloody cloth from Bella's hand, the Cleaner offered her his hand and helped her out of her chair. "Oh, don't worry," he said, turning his attention back to Mick. "It's in bad shape, but we'll come up with a way it can be found by the police. Just keep Barney Rubble over here out of any more trouble, okay?"

Edward rolled his eyes then took Bella's hand. Mick unsuccessfully attempted to suppress a smile, and the three walked out of the house. He shook his head, smiling again, as he noticed the large trucks marked "HAZMAT" parked in the front yard. Without speaking, the three entered Mick's car to head to the next confrontation.

Driving several miles to their destination, they were silent, and the tension filling the car was almost smothering. Arriving at the old Victorian-style house, Mick parked the car and exited first.

"Bella," Mick whispered, "call Jackson and tell him where we are. We'll likely need an ambulance for the girl. And tell him our tip says Phelps isn't here. Otherwise they'll come in full SWAT approach."

Bella quickly called Jackson on her cell, and they began the slow walk up to the porch.

"Wait," Edward said as he concentrated on the silence. "The old woman recognizes you, Mick, of course. She's ashamed, but he told her he'd kill her if the girl wasn't there when he got back. He might have been her son, but she completely believes he'd do it. She's watching from the front door peephole."

They continued until they were standing in front of the door, and Mick knocked soundly. "Mrs. Phelps, we know she's in there. Just let us get her and take her home. Her mother misses her."

A frail, sobbing voice spoke behind the door. "You don't understand, Mr. St. John. He'll kill me if I let you in. You know what he's capable of, killing that poor police officer. He'll kill me, too."

Bella gasped at the mention of her father's death. "Mrs. Phelps, I'm a police officer." She raised her badge so it could be seen through the peephole. "There are more officers on the way. If you don't let us in, they will tear your house apart to get in. You could get hurt. Just let us in. We'll make sure your son never harms a hair on your head. I promise."

The standoff continued in silence until a shrill scream rang through the air.

"Help me! Oh, God, please help me!"

Edward shoved to the front of the group. "Mrs. Phelps," he growled through clenched teeth, "open this door, or, so help me God, I _will _knock it and you down."

As the screams continued in the background, Mick heard the click of the door unlocking, and Mrs. Phelps swung it wide open. He didn't wait to see what the others were doing; he dashed upstairs toward the screaming girl. When he located the room, he hesitated, terrified, before slowly opening the door.

When he'd found Beth all those years ago, she was so small, and she cowered against the wall, shivering and afraid. He'd held his hand out to her, telling her he was there to take her home. Looking at this poor girl in front of him, he was not sure he could do the same.

She was dirty, and her hair was tangled. Covered in cuts and bruises, she was very thin, and her eyes, red and brimming with tears, were dead. She was handcuffed to an old cast iron radiator, and blood was dripping down her arm where the metal had cut into her flesh. When she saw Mick, she let loose a bloodcurdling scream. Before he could speak, Mick felt a hand rest against his back.

"Let me," Bella said softly, walking past him to sit next to Annie on the floor.

He watched as Bella showed Annie her badge and quietly explained that she and Mick had come to take her back to her mother. After assuring Annie that her mother didn't hate her and wanted her back no matter what had happened, Bella motioned Mick over.

"Sweetheart," Bella whispered, "he's only going to take the handcuff off. I swear he's not going to touch you."

Mick quickly popped open the handcuff, and Annie's arm fell limply to her side. As Annie collapsed, Bella wrapped her arms around her, holding her up off the floor.

"Mick, tell the paramedics to come up here with a stretcher. I think she's tired enough now that they'll be able to touch her, but warn them she might need sedation." As Mick walked toward the door, Bella called out, stopping him. "And Mick? Make sure her mother's on the first flight out."

Mick slowly descended the stairs, meeting Edward at the foot. Through the door, Mick could see several police cars and an ambulance screech to a halt outside, and Jackson led the posse into the house. After a brief discussion, activity swirled around them. Mrs. Phelps, sobbing and pleading, was handcuffed and led to a cruiser. Mick passed Bella's message onto the paramedics, who rushed upstairs and retrieved Annie on a stretcher as Bella followed. Jackson took statements from Mick and Edward before they all followed Bella out to the ambulance.

Edward pulled Bella into a tight embrace. "Will she be okay?"

"Physically, maybe. But she'll never be the same inside." Bella laid her head on Edward's chest and looked over at Mick. "I promised her I'd go to the hospital with her, but we were supposed to meet everyone at Jackson's. Can you two go explain where I am and tell them I'll be there soon?"

Mick nodded. "Sure thing. We'll go pick up your truck on the way."

Edward released Bella, and she dug her keys out of her pocket, handing them to him. Edward placed his hand gently against her cheek and leaned in to kiss her. This time, Mick looked away.

***

Even though everyone had long since eaten dinner, they remained at at the house until Jackson and Bella finally walked through the door several hours later. Although Edward seemed calm during the wait, Mick had been a bundle of nerves. He passed the time calling Annie's mother to give her the good news. He then called Beth, telling her how much he loved her and asking her to make arrangements for Annie's mother to fly to Huntsville as soon as possible. Finally, he asked Edward for Alice's number, and he called and thanked her profusely for her help.

Once Jackson and Bella sat at the kitchen table, Mick waited impatiently as Jackson's wife and Leah brought them something to eat. Each fork lift and chew seemed to take an eternity, and he wondered if he'd eaten so _damn slowly_ as a human. As soon as Mick thought it, Edward laughed from his seat next to Bella. They exchanged a knowing glance, and Mick couldn't help but smile.

Finally, the plates were clean of their food and the dishes taken to the sink. Mick looked at Jackson and Bella expectantly, and he couldn't wait any longer. "What happened at the hospital? How is she?" he asked, almost yelling.

Jackson took a deep breath. "Once she was sure she was safe, she changed completely. She went from being scared to asking for pictures of Phelps' _friends_. She pointed eight out of a photo lineup, and police in Tennessee, Florida, and Alabama have gone to pick them up."

"What are they being arrested for?" Angela asked from another seat at the table. Mick was sure she didn't really want to know.

Bella looked at her hands, balled up in fists on the table. "He'd been loaning her out to other men."

Horrified gasps sounded around the room. Mick looked squarely at Edward, wanting his thoughts heard.

_If he wasn't already dead, I'd kill the motherfucker myself._

Edward simply nodded in response and wrapped his arm around Bella's shoulder, pulling her until her head rested on his shoulder.

"Mick?" Bella asked weakly. "When will her mother be here?"

"Tomorrow afternoon," he replied, trying to relax his clenched jaw enough to speak.

"Make sure you talk to her about what's happened. Annie thinks her mother won't want her anymore because she'd been used so terribly." Tears were slowly falling down Bella's face.

Mick reached across the table, placing his hand gently on Bella's. "I've told her it's bad, but I'll make sure she knows everything. She's just so glad Annie's still alive."

Jackson stood, his chair scrapping loudly across the tile floor. "I've got to get back to the station. One of the arrests will be by our officers. And I know everyone here is tired, and most of you are heading out early tomorrow. We should probably call it a night."

As everyone said their goodnights and made plans to meet in the morning before they left Guntersville, Mick walked into the front yard, anxious for some solitude after a long day. As he stood, enjoying the cold breeze and peering at the moon, he thought about Beth. It was all over, and he was ready to return to Beth's warm, inviting arms. He'd missed her more than he thought possible, and the daily phone calls were no longer soothing his ache for her. He wanted to touch her, to feel her breath as she whispered in his ear, to see her blush under his hands.

He was concerned about Bella, but he knew she'd always have Edward by her side. Still, they were now friends for eternity, and he would always be there for them. He hoped they'd be able to meet Beth someday and see how their lives could be if they simply concentrated on their love for one another. He was sure, especially after talking to Alice, they'd be fine, even if the road wouldn't always be easy.

_Two more days. Two more days and I'll be back home with my Beth._

"Mick?" Edward's voice called from behind him.

"Edward," Mick said, turning around to watch him approach, "how's Bella?"

"She's okay, I think. She's stronger than I ever gave her credit for." Edward bit his lip and nervously ran his hand through his hair. "I need a favor, Mick."

Concerned by Edward's tone, Mick grabbed Edward's shoulder and gave it a friendly squeeze. "Sure, what is it?"

"Could you not make plans to return to L.A. until we've had a chance to talk?"

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**A/N: Many thanks to all my great readers and reviewers; I truly appreciate all the feedback you've given me. Just so you know, there are only five chapters to go.**


	19. She Believes

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Sorry this chapter is late. I am currently participating in NaNoWriMo and writing with OnePushyFox, so my writing schedule is a little off. Thank you so much for the continued wonderful reviews. After this chapter, there will only be four chapters to go.**

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**Chapter 19: She Believes**

Another cloudy November day afforded Edward the opportunity to help Bella see everyone off. He and Bella were now staying in her house, and everyone gathered there before their trips back to their own homes. Phil, wanting to make as much of the daylight hours as possible, left earliest, giving Bella a warm hug and making her promise to stay in touch. Billy, Jacob, and Leah left for the airport after breakfast. Billy was beginning to come out of his fog of grief, and he eyed Edward warily before leaving. Jacob and Leah, however, hugged him warmly and asked him to take care of Bella. Bella asked Angela and Ben to stay behind a few more days, and they moved into Edward's room at the lodge.

The night before, Edward had been nervous about asking Mick to postpone his trip home. As soon as Bella safely saw Annie to the hospital, Mick's thoughts of Beth played in a constant, happy loop, one that was impossible for Edward not to hear. Watching Mick looking up at the moon in Jackson's front yard, his thoughts solely on his Beth, Edward almost changed his mind. In the end, he knew Mick was the only one who could help him. He was the only one who could help them both.

Walking up behind him, Bella ran her hands around his waist, laying her cheek on his back. "Edward, why are you so tense?"

Standing on the balcony and watching the swaying trees, Edward hadn't realized his hands were in tight fists at his sides. "Just thinking about everything." He pried her hands apart, raising each to his mouth to kiss her palms. "I'm better now." He turned around and sweetly kissed her forehead. "Go downstairs and let Mick in. I'll meet you in the kitchen in a few minutes, okay?"

Bella looked at him, confusion clouding her eyes. Hearing the doorbell ring, she smiled, standing on tiptoes to kiss him quickly before heading downstairs. As she walked away, Edward's cellphone beeped, and he opened it to find a new text message from Alice.

"Quit ignoring my calls and ANSWER YOUR PHONE!"

Edward quickly typed a response.

"Don't worry. I have everything under control."

He turned off his phone and threw it onto a wicker chair. Breathing deeply, enjoying the scent of Bella and her surroundings, he turned and walked downstairs. Standing in the kitchen doorway, he found Mick and Bella sitting on opposite sides of the kitchen table.

Watching her, his cold heart swelled with love, tightening his chest to almost bursting. Every sound she made, every tiny movement of her body made his stomach flutter. He was completely lost in her, just as he'd always been. As they made love that morning, she begged him to quit punishing himself for the past, to concentrate on their future. Still, he hated himself for the years they'd lost. He hoped today he could show her that the future, their future together, was the most important thing to him now. As if she was the one who read thoughts, she looked at him, her chocolate eyes sparkling with love, and the intensity made Edward gasp.

"Hey, you," Bella said, pulling out the chair next to her. "Mick was just telling me that Annie's mother arrived this afternoon."

Edward sat down, taking Bella's hand in his. "How did everything go?"

"Her mother is understandably distraught," Mick said, rubbing his temple slowly. "But she's a trooper when she's with Annie. She made sure Annie knows this wasn't her fault, that she doesn't blame Annie for what happened to her." He sighed sadly. "They've got a long way to go, though."

They sat silent for a few seconds before Bella spoke up. "So, Edward, what's this big conversation you want to have with us? I'm not sure I can stand the suspense anymore."

Edward swallowed hard, looking at Bella's and Mick's expectant faces. "There's something I want to talk to you both about, but I need you to let me finish before you respond."

Bella and Mick exchanged a worried look, and Bella shrugged her shoulders. They both finally looked at Edward, nodding, and he began.

"Mick, you've done a lot for us. I'm not sure where we'd be if you hadn't intervened and taken pity on me. I will be forever grateful for that. That's why I wanted you to know our plans." He paused, feeling Bella's hand clench his tightly. Rubbing her arm soothingly with his free hand, he gazed at her as he continued. "We're leaving Alabama. And I've agreed to Bella's wish that she be changed."

"Oh," Mick said slowly, his jaw dropping.

Edward turned from Bella's confused face to look at Mick's shocked expression. "I know it's not something that she and I have agreed on before, but, after everything that's happened, I've realized that I cannot exist without her. I want what she wants. I want us to have our eternity. Only, I want you to change her."

Bella jerked her hand out of Edward's grasp, and, as she jumped from the table, her chair crashed to the floor. "No! Edward, no! I want it to be you!"

Edward stood and pulled a struggling Bella into his arms. "I know, love. And, after we talk, if that's what you still want, I will do it. I promise. Just hear me out."

"You don't know what you're asking," Mick said, his voice muffled as he buried his face in his hands.

Cradling Bella in his arms, Edward kissed the crown of her head. He released her, picking up her chair, and waited for her to sit down again. Her sparkling eyes were now filled with sadness, but Edward knew he couldn't back down. "I understand, Mick, I do. But everything that limits my existence would be passed to her if I change her. She could be so much more if you were her sire."

"Edward," Bella whispered, "I don't understand."

Edward took her hand, squeezing it tightly. "Yesterday, when Alice called and said we needed to find you, I had to fucking _hide_ in the car," he said through clenched teeth. "You were in danger, and we had to worry about whether someone would see my horrible skin in the sunlight. When I made sure Phelps would never hurt you, the pooled blood on the floor almost drove me mad." He lowered his head, too ashamed to look at her. "I couldn't even make love to you for the first time without stopping to control the bloodlust that screamed for me to kill you."

Pulling Edward to her, Bella wrapped her arms around his hips. Squeezing him tightly, she looked up at him through her thick lashes. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I know how hard things are for you."

"You see," Edward said, kneeling beside her chair, taking her face between his shaking hands, "it doesn't have to be like that for you. Not if Mick and you agree. A vampire's existence is never easy, but why not make it easier if we have the chance?"

Closing her eyes, Bella sighed. When she opened them again, Edward could see. She understood. He kissed her tenderly before releasing her and turning to face Mick.

Taking a deep breath and exhaling in a rush, Mick seemed to be, if not in agreement, at least in surrender. "Edward, I need to think about this. I need to talk to Beth. But you both should know, I've never sired anyone before."

"Neither have I. I'm just asking you to think about it."

Mick stood, pushing his chair quietly under the table. "I'll call you after I talk to Beth."

Edward nodded, and Mick circled the table, kissing the top of Bella's head before walking away. Hearing the muffled click of the door, Bella rose to her feet, Edward still kneeling in front of her. She gently ran her hands through his hair, just as she'd done the night they reunited.

"Baby?"

Edward sighed, his eyes half closed. "Yes, love?"

"Before we do this, no matter how it happens, there's one more thing I want."

He gazed at her with love and earnestness. "Anything."

"Oh, you really shouldn't have said that," she said, giggling and running towards the stairs.

In a blur of motion, Edward rushed toward her, swooping her into his arms before she her foot hit the first stair. "You should really know by now that you can't outrun me."

She placed a wet, open-mouthed kiss on his neck. "Take me to bed or lose me forever."

"I really hate that movie," Edward laughed, "but, I must admit, that did sound very sexy."

"Then why are we still standing here on the stairs?" she asked, licking her lips.

A low growl rumbling deep in his chest, Edward carried Bella upstairs and into the bedroom, slamming the door behind them.

***

Pacing back and forth inside the small lodge room, Mick repeatedly rubbed his face wearily with his hands. For once, he wished he could be Edward for just one day. He would have seen it coming; he would have been prepared. Instead, he was completely blindsided. What Edward and Bella wanted to do was shocking, but Mick had seen many vampire-human couples come to the very same decision. However, he hadn't met any vampires who'd shared their existence with a Cold One, especially one that didn't feed on human blood. How would they even manage?

Mick had attempted living on the blood of animals, but he'd almost wasted away. Bella might be able to hunt with Edward and feed on animals, but it would never completely replace her need for human blood. He was sure Edward knew that. She wouldn't be indestructible, either. While they wouldn't have to be nearly as careful as they'd been, they could never be as uninhibited as two vampires or two Cold Ones could be. Sure, she'd heal quickly, but she'd still feel pain until she did.

"Mick, are you still there? Did I shock you into silence?"

Mick shook his head at the sound of Beth's voice. Lost in his thoughts, he'd briefly forgotten the phone pressed against his ear. "Yes, you did. I'm not sure what to say."

"He's right, and you know he's right." Beth sighed, and Mick knew this was difficult for her, too. "You care for them both deeply, and I know you're very protective of Bella. If you don't do it, he will. Which life do you want for her?"

"And it won't bother you?" Mick wasn't sure if he'd ever want to change Beth, but he'd always thought that, if he ever sired anyone, it would be her.

"I won't lie and say it won't. But I can deal with it." Her voice was always so strong, and he ached to be with her even more. "I haven't met them, but, just trying to see them through your eyes, I've come to care about them, too. And, after all, this is her _choice_. Just as Edward said, she can be so much more if you change her."

"This means more time away from you," he whispered sadly.

"I know, but I'll always be here waiting for you."

Mick smiled. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

"Nothing. I am a gift from God," she said seriously before breaking into raucous laughter.

Exchanging their declarations of love, they reluctantly said goodbye. As soon as Mick ended the call, he made one more before calling Edward, asking him and Bella to come see him.

He knew Beth was right, and he knew it the instant Edward asked him. He just needed space and time to think, to make sure it was something he had the stomach to do. His own sire had tricked him, changing him without his permission. He'd woken bloody and confused, with a thirst he could barely control. Coraline, his sire, had encouraged him to kill, and, for a time, he had. As much as he'd loved who he thought Coraline had been, he hated what she was and what she made him.

But then there was Beth. She'd made him see that he was more than his past, that they could be together and love each other completely. He'd encouraged Edward to find the same thing with Bella, and Edward had. He shouldn't have been surprised it wasn't enough and they'd want eternity. What surprised him was now he wondered if he could have eternity with Beth, too.

He didn't need to hear the knock on the door to know they'd arrived; he could smell them.

_Jesus Christ, don't these two ever __**bathe**__?_

Mick opened the door to a smiling Edward and a worried Bella, and he knew Edward had already read his thoughts. "You two stink. Can you not keep your hands off of each other at all?"

Bella turned a bright shade of red as her jaw dropped, and, laughing, Edward walked them both into the room. Mick motioned them to sit on the edge of the bed while he sat in a chair across from them.

"I already know what you're going to say," Edward said, his foot tapping impatiently, "but could you say it for Bella's benefit?"

Mick couldn't suppress his grin. "I've talked to Beth, and she fully supports my decision to do what you've asked."

"Wow," Bella exclaimed in a gasp. "When?"

"Whenever you'd like," Mick said, patting her on the shoulder.

"Thank you, Mick," Edward said, his voice rough with emotion. "You don't know that this means...well, I guess you do, don't you?"

"I'd like us to talk to Josef, first, if that's okay. He's been in existence longer than the three of us put together, and I need his input." Mick stood walking to his laptop.

"When can we talk to him?" Bella asked.

Swirling his index finger around on the touchpad, Mick turned the laptop to face them. "Just as soon as he answers my video chat request."

A few seconds later, Josef appeared on the screen in full color and glory. Looking briefly confused, his mouth turned up into a bright, wide smile. "Well well, you must be Bella. I can see why Mick hasn't come home yet. You look just..."

Clearing his throat, Mick interrupted Josef. "Yes, this is Bella. And this," he said, pointing, "is Edward."

"Sparklepuss!" Josef cried, laughing. "Why so glum? If I were you I'd be on top of the world right now."

Edward had begun frowning the instant Josef uttered Bella's name, and his new nickname elicited a low growl and a tight arm around Bella's waist. Mick glared harshly at Josef before continuing.

"Josef, as I said on the phone, I just want to make sure we have our bases covered. I understand the mechanics of the change, but is there anything we need to do before we proceed?"

Josef thought for a moment and turned serious. "As long as you understand your responsibility to guide her in our ways and she understands that something could always go wrong, you'll be fine. I'm assuming she's going the retail blood route."

"Yes," Mick said without confirming with Bella.

"Then you should make sure she's in contact with a source where ever they end up. I'm assuming with B.C. over there, they won't stay in Alabama."

Mick ignored Edward's persistent growling. "No, they'll leave once I'm sure she's ready."

Josef nodded in approval. "Good, good. She'll be much too pretty a vampire to waste away in a small town. But, Bella, dear, be sure to come visit us in L.A. You'll love it here, I promise," he said winking. "Mick, call me when it's done; let me know she's okay."

Before Mick could respond, the video chat window went black and closed.

Edward muttered several obscenities before looking at Mick. "What does he mean by your responsibilities? And letting him know she's okay?"

Mick sighed. "As her sire, it's my responsibility to make sure she can function as a vampire without endangering our secret. I was sure she wouldn't want to actually drink from humans, so that's where the retail blood will come in. But I'll still need to make sure she can control her thirst before setting her loose on the world." When Edward began to speak, Mick raised his hand to stop him. "I know you can help her, but, if anything were to happen and it became known that I as her sire didn't guide her, I'd be punished for it."

Bella gently clasped Mick's hand. "What could happen if something goes wrong?"

"You could die or be left in a vegetative state, which happened to Josef's lover. She's never aged, but she's never woken, either." Seeing the worried look in Bella's eyes, Mick squeezed her hand. "Don't worry. You'll be fine."

Edward stood, firmly shaking Mick's hand. "Thank you so much...for everything. We'll discuss plans tomorrow."

"Yes, that will be fine," Mick said, standing and pulling Bella up by their joined hands.

Bella wrapped her free arm around Mick's neck and whispered in his ear. "Thank you."

Still holding Bella's hand, Mick walked them to the door. He kissed Bella softly on the cheek before letting her go.

"Bella," Edward said softly, "why don't you go down the hall and say hello to Angela and Ben? I'll be right behind you." He gave her a quick peck on the lips before she nodded and walked toward Angela's room.

"Mick," Edward said grimly, "if anything goes wrong, you will burn that house down around us, around Bella and me. You will not let me go on without her. Promise me."

Mick didn't pretend to be shocked or to not understand. "I promise."

Edward smiled and nodded, walking down the hall to follow Bella.

Closing the door, Mick sunk into the bed. As he fell asleep, one last thought plagued him.

_Who will make sure I don't have to go on without Beth?_


	20. She Dances and I Dream

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**Playlist song: ****http://www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=eFOKVSN7030**

**A/N: Again, thank you for all the wonderful reviews. The way you've taken to my story means a lot to me. After this chapter, there will be only three chapters remaining. They will be posted each of the next three Mondays, with the last chapter going up 11/30/09.**

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**Chapter 20: She Dances and I Dream**

Underneath a clear and starry sky, Edward and Mick stood in Bella's backyard, listening to the leaf-barren trees sway in the cool, light breeze. Edward had come to love this place just as much as Bella had, and he knew he would miss the peacefulness. He breathed in deeply, just barely catching the scent of the only woman he would ever love.

Mick cleared his throat, breaking the silence. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

"I've never been more ready for anything." Edward looked at Mick and smiled. "I've never been more sure."

"Will your family be angry that you're doing this on your own?" Mick asked, a worried expression on his face.

Edward thought for a moment. "Angry, no. Disappointed, maybe. But we need to do this our way, Bella and I. Hopefully they'll understand that."

A warm, friendly hand clapped Edward's shoulder, and he turned around.

"Everyone's here, and Bella's ready." Jackson straightened his tie and nervously patted down his hair. "You ready to get this show on the road, Edward?"

Looking through the doors into the house, Edward saw Angela coming down the stairs to meet Ben and Jackson's wife. The county judge, a friend of Charlie's, had just arrived, and Jackson's wife was making introductions. Angela waved at him, and he could hear her happy thoughts. There was only one person missing, but Edward was sure the car door he heard slam signaled the last arrival.

"I think our last guest just arrived," Edward said, casting a sideways glance at Mick. "Give us ten minutes, and we'll be ready."

Mick slowly turned to face Edward. "Who were we waiting for?"

At that moment, a chorus of greetings sounded, and Mick's nose twitched. Edward knew Mick would catch her scent before he ever saw her, and he stood back, watching Mick's eyes and smile widen in tandem. Finally, the group in the house parted, and the beautiful blond with crystal blue eyes walked into the yard.

Mick walked slowly toward her, and she stood her ground, waiting for him. When he reached her, he brushed her cheek with a shaking hand before leaning down to kiss her gently. "Beth," he whispered, taking her into his arms.

Edward turned to give them what privacy he could. Staring again at the twinkling stars, he thought about the years he spent away from Bella, how he yearned for the completeness he'd only ever felt with her. His love for her had never wavered, and, now he knew, neither had her love for him. Brief flashes of doubt still clouded her eyes, but Bella was forgiving him every day by allowing him back into her heart. He only hoped he could earn her trust again and, one day, forgive himself.

"Edward?"

He turned once more to find Mick and Beth, hand-in-hand, standing before him. They practically buzzed with an electric charge, and Edward was happy for them. After everything Mick had done for him, Edward made sure Mick would not need to spend one more day without his Beth.

"Edward, this is Beth," Mick said proudly.

"Beth, it is so good to finally meet you. I'm so sorry we've kept Mick here so long." Edward extended a welcoming hand.

Ignoring the offered hand, Beth hugged Edward warmly. "Hey, no one should apologize on their wedding day." She pulled back, her arms still around his shoulders. "Thank you so much for inviting me." Dropping her arms, she straightened his dark gray suit jacket and tie, nodding in approval when she was done.

"It wouldn't be a party without you," Edward said, laughing. Looking over her shoulder, he could see the crowd walk outside. "I think it's time."

As everyone gathered in the center of the yard, the judge walked up to Edward and Mick, and the three stood together, waiting for Bella to descend the stairs. Ben quickly lit the four large torches at the corners of the gathering, and Mick pulled a small black box out of his pocket. Hearing the footsteps on the stairs, Edward looked up to see Bella, her arm linked with Jackson's, walking toward him.

Looking into her shining chocolate eyes, Edward froze. Time and place ceased to exist. The people around them faded away until the only ones left standing were Bella and him. Her tea-length, strapless dress allowed him to see the beautiful porcelain skin of her neck and shoulders, and he could hear the organza and silk rustle with each of her steps. A sheer veil, pinned to her gathered chestnut hair, fell down her back, and her nervous pulse beat against the single strand of pearls he gave her as a wedding present. In her hand, she held a bouquet of variegated tulips tied together with a white ribbon. A faint blush spread across her face as she stood at his side and Jackson placed her hand in Edward's.

The judge spoke, his voice echoing against the trees. "Tonight, we have gathered together to witness the joining of two lives. Edward and Bella, whose enduring love has brought them together, have asked you to join them as they become husband and wife. Before exchanging traditional vows, they would like to say a few words."

"Edward," Bella began, her voice thick and shaky, "things have not always been easy for us, and they won't always be easy in the future. Still, one thing has remained constant: I love you more than life itself. I give you everything that I am and everything I will be, and I only ask that you remain as you are today: by my side." A soft sob escaped her lips as tears ran down her cheeks.

Cupping her face with his hands, he brushed the tears away with the smooth pads of his thumbs. There was so much heartache combined with her love, and he swore to himself that he would make it go away, even if it took forever. "Bella, my love, I have never deserved you, but I am grateful every day that you love me. I will spend every day of eternity showing you how much I love you and working to become the man I see in your eyes. I only ask that you never give up on me, because I will never give up on us again."

Taking each other's hands, Edward and Bella turned toward the judge as he began reciting the vows. Saying the words so many had said before him, Edward still felt as if they were written especially for Bella. When he promised to love, honor, and cherish her, he believed he meant it more than any other man who ever made the same promises. Hearing her pledges to him, he felt like the most loved and the most unworthy being in existence. They exchanged matching gold bands, and the weight of his ring on his hand just felt _right_.

"By the power vested in me by the State of Alabama, I now pronounce you husband and wife." The judge winked at Edward. "You know you've been dyin' to do it all night. You may kiss your bride."

As everyone around them erupted into laughter, Edward wrapped his arm tightly around Bella's waist and pulled her into his chest. He placed one finger under her chin and lifted it, looking deep into her eyes.

"Hello, Mrs. Cullen."

Blushing wildly, Bella giggled. "Hello, Mr. Cullen."

He leaned down, tenderly kissing her lips as he repeated the words in his head.

_My Bella. My wife._

~*~

Slightly tipsy from the champagne at the party, Bella felt a little wobbly as she undressed. She'd never been a girly girl like Alice, but she had felt beautiful in her wedding dress and veil. Edward must have agreed, she thought, since he couldn't keep his hands off her all night. Emboldened by the alcohol, she'd whispered naughty things to him whenever she had the opportunity. She blushed, thinking about how Edward, having reached his limit, was currently running all their friends out of the house so they could be alone.

Sadness was always on the periphery, however. As Angela helped her into the gown, Bella couldn't help wishing her mother had been alive to see her finally happy. Later, she fought back tears as she found herself wishing Charlie was the one giving her away. In the three weeks since Charlie had been killed, so much had changed. She felt guilty for being so happy with Edward, but she knew Charlie would not want her to be alone. Jackson had said as much when she told him about the wedding.

Looking at the thin gold band on her finger, she remembered the night she told Edward she wanted to get married. She said she wanted just one thing before Mick changed her, and Edward had promised to give her anything. As they made love, she whispered her request. She thought he hadn't heard her, but she was too embarrassed to say it again in case he had. When they were dressing later that night to meet Mick at the lodge, Edward dropped to one knee and asked her to marry him. She smiled, remembering how she fell to the floor to kneel with him and they made love as she moaned yes again and again.

She heard a slight tap at the bathroom door, and she examined herself in the mirror. Her cheeks were still rosy from the champagne, and her hair was falling around her face. She had let it grow out a little, and it curled slightly past her shoulders. The georgette babydoll had been a gift from Angela, and Bella liked how it made her look almost innocent. Nothing was innocent, however, about how her body reacted when she thought about the man standing on the other side of the door.

_My husband._

She slowly opened the door, watching as Edward's amused eyes slowly darkened with desire. He was beautiful, standing in only the black silk boxer shorts she bought for him. His broad shoulders were rising and falling as he began to breathe her in deeply. When he licked his lips, it was her undoing.

Pushing him backward, she stood over him as he sat on the edge of the bed. She grabbed the hair at the back of his head and tugged it until he tilted his head up to gaze at her. His mouth opened slightly, and she brought her lips crashing into his. As she attacked his mouth, he wrapped his arms around her hips and ran his hands up her back. Reluctantly pulling away from him, she fell to her knees between his legs.

"Bella," Edward said, his voice rough and breathy, "you don't have to do that."

Hooking her fingers under the waistband of his boxers, she pulled them down just enough to expose his glistening head. "I know," she whispered, lowering her mouth. "I want to."

She slowly swiped her tongue around him, and he hissed loudly. Encouraged, she opened her mouth, taking him in slowly. He was hard and cold, and his skin tasted salty. Peeling his boxers down over his hips, she wrapped her hand around his shaft, gripping and massaging as she moved her mouth up and down his length. She smiled around him when she felt his fingers thread into her hair. Soon he was guiding her movements, and she looked up to see him watching her intently.

"Fuck," he whispered, beginning to thrust gently into her mouth. Seeing and hearing him give into her made her skin tingle, and she sucked hard in response.

Suddenly, she was flying through the air. Edward pulled her up and, embracing her tightly, spun around until they landed on the bed, her on her back and him hovering over her. He ground his hard length into her stomach, grabbing her hip to to increase the friction. His amber eyes had turned completely black, and she shivered.

"I'm sorry," he said, moving his hips in short thrusts. "I shouldn't have said that. You just felt so good." He buried his face into her neck, moaning.

Writhing underneath him, she spread her legs wider, allowing him to feel the wetness there. "I liked that you said it," she admitted, blushing. "But why did you stop me?"

"It was so good. I wasn't going to be able to control myself, and I didn't want to hurt you." He ran the tip of his tongue up the side of her neck, and, reaching her earlobe, sucked it hard. She felt his warm breath on her ear as he began to whisper. "So, you don't mind if I say how much I want to fuck you right now?"

"Oh, God, no," she whimpered, arching her back to press herself more firmly against him.

She could hear his low growl as he lifted off her slightly, pulling one strap of her gown down her shoulder until he freed her breast. He kissed her, his tongue plunging into her mouth and his hand gently pinching her taut nipple. Wanting more, she pushed him away just far enough to be able to remove her gown completely.

Edward's eyes burned into her, and she never felt so beautiful and wanted. He placed his hand flat against her stomach, running it up between the swells of her breasts and over her shoulder. "Bella, I need to be inside you." His voice was soft and pleading.

Wrapping her legs around his waist, she shifted and opened herself up to him. She watched as he guided himself between her wet lips, rubbing his head slowly back and forth against her clit. As her hips began to buck from pleasure, he moved slightly lower and thrust deep inside her.

Throwing her head back, she cried out loudly. Anytime Edward touched her, she became electrified, and the sensation was magnified a hundred fold when he was inside her. Tiny sparks seemed to jump between them, millions of intense shocks traveling over their bodies. Closing her eyes, she concentrated on how he filled her, body and soul. She would never be complete without him. If he were ever to leave her again, he'd leave a gaping hole in her heart vastly larger than the one he closed when he returned to her.

"Love, look at me," Edward whispered, stroking her cheek with the tips of his fingers.

Bella lifted her heavy lids, and, when she looked into his eyes, he began to slowly move, withdrawing completely before thrusting into her, each time harder than the last. Their gaze remained unbroken as they began to crash into each other, moaning and gasping. She could feel his body begin to tighten, and she knew he was on the edge. The pressure building inside her, she felt Edward's fingers move lower until he was stroking her, bringing her onto the edge alongside him. Tightening her legs around him, she suddenly felt herself fall, spasms rocking her entire body as she came. As she fell, she pulled Edward with her, and he exploded inside her, thrusting deeply until he was completely spent.

Still lost in each other's eyes, they didn't move. Bella waited until her breathing and heartbeat calmed before she spoke. Her voice was still faint and shaky.

"I love you."

Edward smiled, rubbing his thumb across her swollen lips. "I love you, too, Mrs. Cullen." Kissing her softly, he lay down beside her, wrapping his arm around her waist.

Bella laughed. "That's going to take some getting used to. Every time someone says it, I want to giggle like a little girl."

"I like it when you giggle," he said, rubbing slow circles on her stomach. "Don't ever stop."

Looking on the nightstand, Bella saw Edward's cell phone and picked it up. "I guess we can turn this back on now."

The instant she decided to tell him she wanted to get married, his phone started ringing, and she knew it was Alice. As much as she loved Alice and the other Cullens, she wanted their decision to be theirs alone, and she asked Edward not to answer the calls. After proposing, Edward continued to ignore Alice's ever persistent efforts, saying she would only fly to Alabama and take over the entire wedding. By temporarily avoiding Alice, they were able to have the ceremony they wanted. After all, Edward explained, Alice had forever to plan as many vow renewals as would make her happy.

Taking the phone from her hand, he held down the power button until the screen lit brightly. After a few seconds, the text message chime began sounding, and it didn't stop for at least four minutes.

"Good Lord, how many text messages can one vampire send?" Bella asked, amused.

"Let's see what the little pixie has to say." Edward began thumbing through the messages. "She can't believe I turned off the phone. How could we get married without her? She wants me to tell you not to buy off the rack. Oh, then she says she can't believe you bought off the rack. She's never speaking to us again. Oh, wait, she didn't mean that, and she can't wait to see us."

Bella laughed, imagining Alice's increasing horror as she saw more and more of the wedding plans in her visions. Thinking about what else Alice had seen, she blanched. "Nothing about what's happening tomorrow?"

"No, nothing about that." He kissed her forehead. "I expect Carlisle has told her not to meddle. He trusts us to make the right decision."

She nuzzled into his chest. "You've talked to Carlisle about it, haven't you?"

"I wanted some advice before I talked to you and Mick," he admitted sheepishly. "He completely supports us. You don't mind that I talked to him, do you?"

Sadness washed over her briefly as she again wished she could talk to Charlie, tell him how much she missed him. She tried not to let Edward see her grief, afraid he would mistake it for doubt. "No, baby, I don't mind. I understand wanting to talk to your father."

Grabbing her and pulling her into a tight spoon, Edward kissed her shoulder. "I know you miss him. It doesn't seem like it now, but it does get easier."

Bella had always thought of Edward as Carlisle and Esme's son, but, with those words, she remembered that he, too, mourned and missed his parents. She leaned back into his embrace, and he kissed her shoulder again.

Lying in her lover's arms, Bella began to drift off to sleep. Struggling to stay awake, she yawned despite herself.

"Go to sleep, love. We'll have time tomorrow, I promise."

Turning her head, Bella kissed the corner of Edward's mouth. "Good night, Edward."

Grabbing her chin, he held her still, kissing her deeply. "Good night, Mrs. Cullen."

"Say it again," Bella demanded, giggling.

"Good night, Mrs. Cullen."

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**A/N: Visit the Breathe Me blog page to see Bella's wedding dress and Edward's suit:****  
****http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/****#ch20****  
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****Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:****  
****http://www[dot]twilighted[dot]net/forum/viewtopic[dot]php?f=44&t=6150****  
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	21. Time For Sleep

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: Thank for all the wonderful reviews you continue to send. I'm so glad this story means so much to people.**

** After this chapter, only two chapters remain.**

Playlist song:  
http://www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=Am0IFwjPyYA

**Breathe Me page with updated playlist:  
http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/**

**Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:  
http://www[dot]twilighted[dot]net/forum/viewtopic[dot]php?f=44&t=6150**

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Chapter 21: Time for Sleep **

As the daylight began to drift into darkness, Mick held Beth in his arms, thankful she was by his side. The ache he'd felt since leaving L.A. was finally gone, and he'd spent their hours together soothing the fire in his body that blazed since the moment he saw her walk through Bella's door. Making love again and again, they finally collapsed and slept. It was the first meaningful rest he'd had since coming to Alabama.

Watching Beth sleep, he was anxious for her to wake. As she began to stir, he embraced her tightly, cradling her from behind. Her head lolled back limply, and she turned her head to look at him.

"Hey there. Am I dreaming?" she whispered. "If I am, just let me sleep."

He kissed her forehead, his lips forming a smile against her skin. "No dream. I'm here. I missed you so much."

Beth turned over to face him, lightly brushing his mouth with her fingers. "I missed you, too. Next time you leave for a few weeks, I'm going with you. This separation stuff sucks." She laughed but stopped when she realized Mick was quiet. "What's wrong, Mick?"

He took a deep breath, willing his mind not to reel at the scent of her. "I've wanted to talk to you about something for so long. I don't think I can wait anymore."

She scowled, her face transformed instantly into a worried mask. "What is it?"

Extending his hand palm up, he held a small black box containing all the hopes and dreams he had for them. Watching Edward and Bella exchange their vows only cemented his plan, and he knew he couldn't wait until they returned to L.A. to know her answer. He watched as the confusion in her eyes cleared, replaced by welling tears. He opened the box, displaying more than just a ring to her. He was showing her his heart.

"Beth, will you marry me?" Searching her face, he sighed when she smiled brightly.

"Yes," she whispered, tears falling down her cheeks. She raised her trembling left hand, spreading her fingers. "Will you put it on?"

Holding her hand in his, he removed the ring from the box, slipping it easily on her finger. It fit perfectly, just as they did. He kissed her fingers, then her palm, finally resting his lips against hers. Her arms were the only true home he'd known, the only one he would ever know, and he moaned as she embraced him. Their lips parted, and he tasted her again. Her sweetness was as strong as it had been the first time he'd kissed her, and he knew he'd never tire of her taste on his lips and his tongue.

"I love you so much," he whispered.

She sighed, resting her head over his heart. "I love you, too, Mick."

They lay together as the room grew darker. It was almost time to leave for Bella's, and Mick reluctantly released Beth and sat up. "We have to get ready."

Beth stretched and looked up, her eyes still happily glazed. "How long will it take?"

"I'm not sure," Mick shrugged. "I think my change took overnight, but Josef said others have taken a couple of days."

"Josef's really worried about her, you know. I'm not sure what Bella said during that chat, but he was pretty taken with her." Standing, she extended her arm to admire her ring. "If I were Edward, I'd definitely not let her come to L.A. for the wedding without him."

"Oh, already planning the nuptials, I see." He grinned, pleased to see her so happy.

"Are you kidding? Since I was twelve years old." Walking around the bed, she sat next to him and took his hand. "Are you ready for this tonight?"

Mick nodded slowly. "Yes, as much as I can be. Edward's right, of course. If I change her, she can easily mainstream with humans. She'll be able to move and travel without worry that someone will discover her secret. As far as anyone else is concerned, she's just another pretty face. It's important to Edward that she not live under that constant fear the way he does. She also won't have that horrible bloodlust. I'll be able to teach her to control her impulses in a way Edward never can. He's always on edge, afraid he'll one day lose control. As long as I do my job, Bella won't have that weight on her shoulders."

"Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?"

"Not convince, explain." He stood, pulling her up next to him. "I just want you to know I've thought this through."

She kissed him softly. "I never doubted it. Everything will be fine, you'll see."

Mick hugged her tightly, again quietly hoping tonight would also bring them closer to their own forever.

~*~

Standing outside the bedroom door, Edward took slow, deep, steadying breaths. Even though this had been his idea, having someone else change Bella was not something he relished doing. Still, he wanted an eternity with her, an eternity she wouldn't have to spend in fear and trepidation as he did. If anything ever happened to him, Bella would be able to blend in with humans and live a life of freedom he'd never know. No matter how much it would tear him up inside to watch someone else change her, he knew it was the right thing to do.

When it was time, Edward slowly opened the door. Bella was standing on the balcony, and the cool breeze billowed her gauzy white top around her. It was the same outfit she'd worn the night she allowed him to love her again, and he smiled remembering. When she turned to face him, the beautiful disarray of her hair and the depth of molten eyes made him gasp.

He felt Mick's hand on his shoulder, and Mick spoke to him wordlessly. _We don't have to do this now. Maybe you need time._

Edward didn't need time; he needed courage. Looking at Bella, he realized she had enough for both of them.

Taking Bella's hand, Edward led her to the bed. He sat first, moving to sit up against the headboard. He took off his shirt, knowing his cold flesh would sooth her during the change. He spread his legs apart and motioned for Bella to sit. When she sat on the edge of the bed, he lifted her, placing her gently between his legs, her back resting against his chest. He took in a deep breath and concentrated on her heartbeat, which was racing. She shivered slightly before relaxing into him.

Mick walked toward them, taking off his jacket and rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. He sat down, facing Bella, and began speaking in a deep, calm voice. "Before we start, I need to make sure you understand what is going to happen and what it means. Okay?"

Edward wrapped his arms around Bella's waist as she nodded and laced her fingers tightly around his hands.

Mick continued. "For our line, turning a human is a very serious obligation. When I turn you, I become your sire. I am responsible for making sure you have the knowledge and the training you need to exist as a vampire. I will not leave until I'm sure you can do so. Understand?"

Bella nodded again.

"Bella, I need you to say you understand."

Her voice was soft and timid. "I understand."

"The process of turning is very painful. I will drain you of almost all your blood, and then you must feed from me or you will die. There is no guarantee that you will survive this. However, I will do everything in my power to make sure that you do. Do you understand?"

"Yes, I understand." Her voice was stronger.

"Finally, once you are turned, you will need to consume human blood. You won't be like Edward; you cannot exist on animal blood alone. You and Edward may hunt together, but you will still need human blood. Do you understand?" Mick looked at Edward, and it was obvious the question was directed towards them both.

"I understand," she said, clear and determined.

Bella slowly undid the top button of her blouse, pulling it down her shoulder to expose the artery on the side of her neck. As she leaned her head to the opposite side and stretched, Edward brushed her hair behind her head and kissed her throat tenderly.

"I love you," he whispered, his mouth dry.

Bella rubbed her hand soothingly down the outside of his leg. "I love you, too. I always have."

Edward sighed, his love for her growing as she comforted him. Mick and Edward then exchanged a tense glance. It was time.

Mick slowly leaned into the crook of Bella's exposed neck. Although he knew it was the monster inside Mick doing it, Edward still felt a blaze of jealously when he saw Mick lick his lips hungrily, his fangs extending. Mick grabbed Bella's shoulders and looked up at Edward with white eyes as he slowly sunk his fangs into the soft flesh covering her throbbing artery.

Edward jaw tightened as waves of anger crashed into him. Bella was his, and he wanted to give her everything. Yet, here he was, watching another drink the life from her and give her eternity. It didn't matter that it had been his idea; it was eating him from the inside out.

Mick continued to drink while Bella moaned and thrashed, her body pressed up against Edward. He was finally pulled out of the black jealousy by Mick's thoughts screaming at him.

_Damn it, Edward, concentrate! You have to hold her so I don't rip her throat out!_

Edward wrapped his arm around her waist again, holding her tight enough to stop her violent thrashing. He couldn't bear to hear her moans anymore, so he placed his other hand tightly over her mouth.

It was then that he felt it. With each swallow, Mick had allowed Bella's blood to drip down her shoulder. It was starting to soak into the fabric of her blouse, which was in turn sticking to Edward's bare chest. He pulled away, staring at the streams of blood running down her back.

It was the blood that had sung to him that first day in Forks, and he had wanted to consume her. The same blood called to him every second of the last three years, begging him to come back to her. He had only tasted it once, but it had been bitter with fear and James' venom. Not clean and crimson and sweet, as it was now.

_Just one taste, that's all I want...it's all I need._

He ignored Mick's screaming inside his head and leaned toward Bella's shoulder. He slowly lapped a small drop of her blood into his mouth, leaning his head back to savor it.

_So sweet. So good. So good. So good. Must. Have. More._

As her blood slid slowly across his tongue and down his throat, he could feel the fire spread and reason drain away. When he gazed back to Mick, Edward's eyes were deep, shiny black pools of hunger.

Edward grabbed the hem at the back of Bella's blouse and ripped upwards. He removed his hand from Bella's mouth and held the gauzy remnants across her breasts, while his other hand uncovered her blood-streaked back. Wide-eyed but no longer screaming, Mick continued to grip her shoulders as he took in great gulps. Each time, blood escaped his lips covering the wound and ran down her back.

Edward dipped his head down and began running his tongue over Bella's porcelain skin. First his licks were short and tentative, but, as he tasted more of her sweet blood, he flattened his tongue to take long, hard swipes across her back. All the while, he ran his free hand up and down her side and across her stomach.

He was acutely aware of Mick watching him, but he was too far gone to care. Mick had begun slowly stroking Bella's arm with one hand and buried his fingers of the other in her hair, caressing the back of her head. Edward briefly thought to object, but another ribbon of blood called his name. As Bella's blood continued to cascade down her back, Edward realized Mick was allowing more blood to flow than was necessary, as if he was purposely sharing it.

Bella's moans, which had started out strangled and pained, were now longing and breathy. It wasn't until she sighed his name that Edward was sure she aware of what he was doing. It only served to push him further, and he cupped her breasts in his hands, massaging her slowly as he and Mick continued to drink her blood.

"Edward, stop."

It was a few seconds before he realized Mick had said the words out loud. Finally able to concentrate on Mick's voice, Edward growled, pulling Bella flush against him.

Mick sunk his teeth into his own wrist, opening a vein. He offered it to Bella, who was barely conscious. "Drink."

Bella weakly grabbed his wrist and brought it to her mouth. Small, tentative sips turned into large, hungry gulps. After several seconds, Mick pulled his wrist away, and Bella fell back limply against Edward.

"Bella, sweetheart, rest now," Mick whispered, brushing her sweat-drenched hair from her face. "Beth and I will be here when it's over." Addressing himself to Edward, Mick's eyes hardened. "Don't get venom in her wound."

"I won't, I swear."

When Mick closed the door, Edward moved from behind Bella, slowly lowering her onto the bed. He was shocked to see the heavy streams of blood that had run down the front of her shoulder and over her chest. Peeling her shirt away, he wasn't sure what he should do.

"Edward?" she whispered meekly.

He lay on the bed next to her, cupping her cool cheek with his hand. "Yes, love?"

"It's okay. I don't mind."

"What's okay, Bella?" he asked, confused.

Her breathing was becoming shallow. "What you want to do. I don't mind."

Bowing his head in shame, he couldn't look at her. "Bella..."

He felt her fingers run through his hair, soothing him. "Don't be ashamed, Edward. I want you to." She let her hand fall to her side. "I'm just so tired, baby."

"Go to sleep, love. I'll be here when you wake up, I promise."

As her eyes drifted to a close, Edward began slowly, languidly tasting the drying blood on her skin. Taking care to avoid the wound, he ran his tongue over her shoulder, her breast, and her stomach, consuming every drop of her blood. When he was finished and she was clean, he covered her naked torso with a sheet and pulled her into his arms. He wanted to hold her until her beautiful eyes reopened.

~*~

Cracking the door slightly, Mick looked in on Edward and Bella and found the same scene as he had the last three days. Edward held Bella, unmoving and eyes closed, in his arms. Every so often, he would tell her he loved her and ask her to please wake up. Mick and Beth had both begged Edward to let them relieve him, but he refused to leave Bella's side.

"There's no change," Mick said sadly as he sat next to Beth on the couch downstairs. "I'm afraid she'd not going to make it." Running his hands through his hair, he began to pull it angrily. "This is all my fault. All my fault. First Charlie and now Bella."

Beth grabbed his wrists and yanked his hands away from his hair. "That's not true! You had nothing to do with Charlie's death," she cried as she cradled his face in her hands. "Look at me, Mick. This is not your fault. You did everything the correct way. It is beyond your control."

Mick shook his head vigorously. He blamed himself for so much that had happened the last few months. If he had caught Phelps, not only would Charlie be alive, but Annie would not face years of intensive therapy just to sleep through the night. If he had just said no to Edward or, more than that, talked them out of their plans, Bella would be planning their move away from Alabama. Instead, everything was all fucked up, and he didn't know how to begin to repair it. He began to worry that his bad luck would extend to Beth too, that he'd fuck up her life like he had everything else.

"I can tell by the look on your face what's going through that mind of yours, Mick," Beth said, her voice clipped and sharp. "Don't you dare go down that road. The things that have happened have nothing to do with our feelings for each other." The rejection he'd seen so many times was just on the edge of her blue eyes. "I love you, and I will not let you go. No matter what."

Wrapping his arms around her, Mick lifted Beth and sat her in his lap. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and rocked them slowly back and forth. "I love you so much. If it were you up there..."

"It's not me," she whispered. "We're here, and we're okay. They made their decision, and they understood the risk. One day we'll make ours, too, but, right now, we're fine. Okay?"

Mick leaned back on the couch, embracing Beth tight against him. Every time he thought he'd lost Beth, she returned to him, and he fought to keep her. Their love had been enough to overcome anything, and he made Edward believe the same thing was true for him and Bella. What if he'd been wrong? What if fate was that cruel and, despite the love between Edward and Bella, they just weren't meant to be happy?

He lifted Beth and sat her next to him on the couch. He gave her one brief, reassuring kiss, and he walked over to his jacket, retrieving his cell phone from the pocket.

"Are you calling Josef?" Beth asked.

Mick began paging through his address book. "No, I'm calling Alice."

"You promised him, Mick." Beth stood reaching out for the phone. "You know what he wants."

"I'm not calling them so they can come change Edward's mind," he said, his finger pausing over the call button.

"Then what are you doing?"

Mick pressed the button and turned away from Beth. "I'm giving his family a chance to say goodbye."


	22. The Joy and the Fear

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.__  
_  
**A/N: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. I read every one in humble amazement.**

**There is only one more chapter left. To commemorate finishing the story, I am having a giveaway - see my blog for more information and to enter:**

**http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/2009/11/20/my-first-giveaway/**

**Breathe Me page:  
http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/**

**Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:  
http://www[dot]twilighted[dot]net/forum/viewtopic[dot]php?f=44&t=6150**

* * *

**Chapter 22: The Joy and the Fear**

Edward watched as the sun set on their fifth day as man and wife, the fourth day he had waited for Bella to open her eyes. He had carried Bella to her balcony, and he cradled her limp, sheet-wrapped body in his lap. She was still breathing, and her heart was still beating. Neither had returned to the strength Mick expected, and Edward knew they were preparing for the pyre he made Mick promise to create if anything went wrong. Mick was only waiting now for one last confirmation that Bella was gone forever.

"Love, I know you're in there," he whispered, stroking her cool cheek. "You wouldn't leave me alone. I don't know what to do, and I wish you could tell me."

He heard the clamoring thoughts before the opening and closing doors and the footsteps up the stairs. He wasn't sure why they were bothering to whisper; even if he didn't have vampire hearing, he'd still know every thought they had in their heads. He continued to look out into the woods, rocking Bella back and forth, until he felt a hand rest on his shoulder.

"Hello, Edward."

Slowly turning toward the sorrow-laced voice, Edward looked into the sympathetic eyes of his father. "Carlisle..." His weak voice broke.

"It's okay, Edward," Carlisle said, reaching out for Bella. "Let me take her. We'll go inside and talk."

Shaking his head, Edward stood, holding Bella close. Carlisle stepped aside as Edward lumbered through the room, laying Bella down on the crumpled bed. Edward sat next to her as Carlisle began to examine her. He growled weakly when Carlisle pulled the sheet back, exposing Bella's bare shoulders and the scabbed bite mark.

"I can tell by the color of your eyes that you drank her blood," Carlisle said in a clinical tone. "If her change were complete, this bite mark would be healed. Are you sure you didn't get venom in her wound?"

"I am absolutely positive," Edward replied strongly. Still, when Carlisle looked in his eyes, he looked away, ashamed that his father knew what he'd done.

Carlisle grabbed Edward's shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Don't be ashamed, Edward. None of us in the same situation would have been able to resist. You're always so hard on yourself."

_He's right._

Edward looked around, expecting to see Mick or Beth in the doorway. Carlisle was the only one in the room with them.

Shaking his head to clear his confusion, he met Carlisle's amber eyes. "How bad are my eyes?" He couldn't bear the thought of seeing his family when his disappointment was so obvious.

"Not bad. Just the slightest ring of red." Carlisle covered Bella with the sheet, lovingly brushing her hair out of her face.

"When will the others be here?"

Carlisle sighed. "As soon as I call and tell them it's time."

Edward's stomach twisted into a tight knot. "And is it time?"

_Time for what?_

Confused, Edward looked at Carlisle. He was sure Mick had explained everything; why would Carlisle be confused?

"Yes, I think it's time." Carlisle sat on the bed next to Edward. "Are you sure this is what you want? Bella wouldn't want this."

"I can't live without her, Carlisle, and it's not fair to her to let her lie like this forever." Edward pressed his mouth into a thin, hard line. "It is right that I should die with her."

_No! God damn it, Edward, listen to me!_

Edward jumped up from the bed, pressing his hands to his temples. "Who is that in my head? Stop yelling at me!"

_Please, Edward, I'm almost there! I just need a little more time!_

Yanking his hair roughly in his clenched hands, Edward began to collapse to the floor. Before his knees made contact with the cold wood, the door flew open. He was lifted by Carlisle and Mick while Beth stood in the background. He heard all their thoughts, but none of them were the screaming voice that wouldn't go away.

_I didn't leave you alone, I swear! I just need a little more time!_

Edward's eyes opened wide in shock, and he stopped struggling against the hands holding him. He knew that voice; it only sounded different inside his head. All the grief and sorrow drained from his body, immediately replaced with the warm feeling her voice gave him. Closing his eyes, he waited, desperate to hear it again.

_Everything is so quiet. Did you leave me, Edward?_

"I can hear her," he whispered.

Everyone turned toward the bed, looking at Bella's motionless body. Carlisle was the first to return his gaze to Edward, and his thoughts made it clear he worried Edward had finally snapped. Still, Carlisle released him and nodded at Mick, who did the same. Moving to the bed, Edward climbed in and wrapped his arms around Bella, kissing her forehead then her cheek then her still lips.

"I'm here, love. I haven't gone anywhere." For the first time in days, Edward smiled.

_Oh, good. I was so scared. I will be there soon, I promise. I just need a little more time._

"I know, I'm sorry," he whispered in her ear. "You can have all the time you want, as long as you come back to me." He sighed, knowing he wouldn't hear her voice again until she opened her eyes.

"Edward?" Carlisle stood at the side of the bed, flanked by Mick and Beth. Their faces were a mixture of grief and pity, and it was clear none of them believed she'd really talked to him.

"She said she'll be here soon. She just needs a little more time." Lifting the sheet away from her shoulder, he looked at the bite mark on her neck. "I know you don't believe me, but, if I'm wrong, what will it hurt to humor me a little?"

Pulling Bella closer into his embrace, Edward ignored the changing of the guard around him. As the hours passed, Carlisle, Mick, and Beth took turns keeping him company. While he appreciated their concern and devotion, he kept his words and thoughts directed solely toward Bella. Whispering in her ear, he told her every thought and feeling he'd had since the day he first saw her in the cafeteria at Forks High School. He told her how he'd always loved her, how he'd waited for her since the first time Alice saw her in a vision, and how he hated himself for ever leaving her. Stroking her cheek, he described her beauty and the way it affected him to his soul every time he saw her. The sun rose again as he continued to tell their story, and, as twilight fell, he told her about the place he wanted them to live when she came back to him.

"Anchorage sounds nice."

Looking up and smiling at his current guard, he realized, seeing Beth's dropped jaw and falling tears, it wasn't her that had spoken. He raised his head and examined Bella's neck. The bite mark was gone.

Ignoring Beth as she ran from the room and screamed down the stairs for Mick and Carlisle, Edward watched as his wife's deep, chocolate eyes opened and stared back at him.

"Will the others come with us?" she creaked.

"We couldn't stop them if we tried," he said, smiling. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly. "Thank you for coming back to me."

"I told you I just needed a little more time." She swallowed hard. "I'm so thirsty. Please tell Beth to go downstairs until..."

"She's already there." Mick's deep voice was shaky, but he grinned widely as he took Bella's hand. "How's my girl? I was starting to worry about you."

"I'm thirsty," she replied meekly.

"We know, dear." Carlisle's voice was smooth and tranquil, but Edward could see the overwhelming relief in his eyes. "Mick is going to help you with that while Edward and I go hunting." As Edward opened his mouth to argue, Carlisle stopped him. "You haven't hunted since before the wedding. Considering your _diet_ since then, it's probably a good idea for us to hunt while Mick introduces her to human blood."

Bella tapped Edward's shoulder. "He means because you drank my blood."

"I know what he means, love," Edward said, laughing. "I wasn't sure you'd remember that."

"I remember everything. I _heard _everything_._" Sitting up, she ran her fingers through Edward's messy hair. "Carlisle's right, you should hunt. I'll be here when you get back."

Edward sat up next to her, and, lifting her chin, kissed her. Her mouth opened instantly, and their tongues met in relaxed, loving strokes. Her sweet taste was only slightly altered by her change, and he buried his hand in her hair to bring her closer.

Mick cleared his throat loudly, and they broke the kiss. "You two have plenty of time for that later," Mick chided. "Right now you need to feed, both of you."

Kissing her quickly once more, Edward jumped from the bed. Grabbing shirts from the closet, he tossed one to Bella and pulled the other over his head. Slipping his feet into his shoes, he turned to Bella once more. "The next hunt, you go with me."

Smiling brightly, she nodded. "Absolutely."

With Carlisle following close behind, Edward walked to the balcony and jumped down to the dry, brown grass below. Running into the woods toward his favorite hunting spot, Edward took large, cleansing breaths that filled him with relief and peace. He'd never felt so free. He'd never felt so alive.

~*~

Lying on her back on the cold ground, Bella closed her eyes. She had hoped for one last sunny day before leaving Alabama, but the cloudy skies had not cooperated. She could smell the green grass and leaves just under the surface of the dormant ground and trees, and she was sorry she'd miss the Spring. She was anxious, however, to get to Anchorage. The other Cullens were already there, setting up the three homes, one each for Carlisle and Esme, Alice and Jasper, and her and Edward. Rosalie had refused to move, and Emmett reluctantly remained in Ithaca with her. She didn't understand why Rosalie had blamed her for the move when it had entirely been Edward's idea. While she'd miss Emmett, she was secretly glad she wouldn't see Rosalie, who made no secret of her disgust of Bella's need to drink human blood.

Her first taste of human blood was not at all the unpleasant experience she'd imagined. It was salty and smelled of rust, but it filled her body with a warmth second only to that she felt when she was with Edward. Over the last several weeks, she'd tried several retail blood types and found that B negative was her favorite. She laughed at the absurdity of it all. Four years earlier, she'd fainted in Edward's arms after watching the biology teacher type someone's blood. Now, she drank blood regularly and had a favorite type. She could even smell a person's blood type when they passed her on the street.

The first two weeks after she woke, her thirst was almost impossible to control. She could only be near Beth immediately after feeding. Any other time, she sat watching the pulsing vein in Beth's neck and wondered how her blood tasted. Mick and Edward were experts at reading her distress, and they'd usher Beth away before it became overwhelming.

That all stopped the night Bella went on her first hunt with Edward. Although they'd planned to go sooner, Mick suggested they wait until her control had improved. He didn't want them to run across a hapless hunter before she was ready. Finally, on the fourteenth day after she woke, she and Edward jumped from the balcony, running into the woods. While she was significantly faster than her human speed, she still had trouble keeping up with Edward. He slowed a bit, allowing her to catch up to him, and they tracked two deer through the state park.

As Edward whispered instructions, Bella could see the deer's pulse throbbing in its neck. Giving her the signal, they both pounced, each taking a deer down. It was the first time Bella's fangs extended on demand, and she sank them deep into the deer's throat. She and Edward watched each other as they fed, and she waited until he stopped before she let the limp animal fall to the the ground. The deer's blood, while not as satisfying as that of human blood, soothed her thirst. As her fangs slowly retracted, she felt calm for the first time since her change. Wiping her mouth on her sleeve, she looked up to see Edward, his black eyes bearing down on her.

They didn't even make it back to the house before they stopped running. Edward pinned her to a tree, ripping her jeans and panties away. There was nothing soft or romantic about what they did. Edward quickly discovered how rough he could be with her new body, and he took her as her screams of his name echoed throughout the woods. Bella sighed, remembering how it felt to have him pounding inside her.

"You're thinking about the tree again, aren't you?"

Before she even opened her eyes, she knew Edward was standing over her, smirking. "And what if I am?" she cooed.

Edward had been disappointed to find, after Bella woke, he could not hear all her thoughts. He hadn't mentioned it until several days later, when he jumped out of his chair saying he heard her again. With some experimentation, they realized he only heard the thoughts she specifically _wanted_ him to hear. He was thrilled to finally be able to have silent communication with his wife, and she was thrilled that she could still keep her thoughts to herself and continue to mystify her husband. Through discussion and research, Carlisle and Mick could not find a reason why everything seemed to work differently for Edward and Bella other than the fact it just always did.

Edward dropped down on the ground next to her, pulling her on top of him. "If you are, I'd tell you to remember how embarrassed you were when you had to sneak back with no pants."

"That was completely your fault, Mr. Cullen, and you still owe me a new pair of jeans."

"Get me out of these jeans," he whispered, "and you can have them."

Bella sat up, straddling him, running her hands underneath his shirt to feel his cool flesh. Her favorite part of her change had been the way Edward felt. His flesh was no longer ice cold but soothingly cool. There were no more blankets as she slept. Instead, they would lie naked, entwined, Edward holding her for the few hours she needed to sleep each night. Under her hands, his body was not the granite stone of a statue; it was now the firm but yielding flesh of a man. She knew it was her strength and not his body that had changed. Still, their first touches and caresses after her change were almost as if they were touching for the very first time.

"Now you know we have a house full of movers, and I'm sure you don't want them to see us going at it in the middle of the backyard."

Yanking her down flush against his chest, Edward took her earlobe into his mouth and bit down hard before whispering in her ear. "By 'going at it,' do you mean fucking, Mrs. Cullen?"

Bella growled and tried to wriggle out of his tight grasp. "I created a monster when I told you I liked when you talked dirty, didn't I?"

Laughing, he let her go. "Yes, you did. But you're right. I don't want an audience looking at your beautiful naked body."

"Well that makes two of us." Sitting up, she looked into the swaying trees for the last time. "When will Jackson start moving in?"

"Next week," Edward said, sitting beside her. "He still shocked that you gave him the house."

Bella shrugged. "It's bigger than their house, and Charlie would have liked having them here once I'm gone. Did you tell the movers to make sure to send our bed to Anchorage?"

"Yes, love. I'm not sure what you'll sleep on until it gets there, though."

"You seem to be pretty partial to the floor lately," Bella said, raising her eyebrow. "In fact, you seem to be partial to anything except the bed. It's a good thing Mick and Beth moved back to the lodge, or they'd have gotten a show by now."

Edward laughed. "I haven't heard you complain. On the contrary, I think you quite like it."

Even though she no longer blushed, she still felt the phantom heat spread across her cheeks every so often. She snuggled close to Edward, and he wrapped his arm around her waist. They sat silently for a few minutes, breathing in the cool breeze and each other.

Edward took a deep breath and sighed. "Bella?"

"Yes?"

"After Mick bit you, where did you go for so long?"

Bella tensed. She knew the question would be asked eventually, but she wasn't prepared to give her answer. Still, she wanted him to know, to understand that she had always meant to come back to him.

"I was with Dad and Renee." She looked down, wanting to avoid the disapproving look Edward was surely giving her.

His arm encircled her tighter. "What did you say?"

"I was with Dad and Renee. They were scared for me, so I stayed and told them everything. I explained what you are and how we hid it from them. They wanted to know why you left me, and I explained the best I could. But then you started telling me our story, including the parts I didn't know, and I just repeated it all to them." She stopped and finally looked into Edward's dark, sad eyes. "I knew if I just waited, they'd understand. And they did. They told me they loved me and they wanted us to be happy."

Edward lowered his head and touched his forehead against hers. "I don't understand. How?"

"I don't know, but I'm not crazy. Dad wanted me to tell you that he's sorry he called you a stupid kid that day in his office." Pausing, she brushed his cheek with her hand. "When did you talk to Dad?"

"The day after Mick caught me on your balcony. Mick said the only way we could be together was if I stopped sneaking around and did things the right way." He kissed her gently. "I may not understand what happened, but I don't think you're crazy."

Relaxing into his arms, Bella smiled. "When do we have to leave?"

"Now, I'm afraid. Jackson's waiting for us in the car."

Standing up, Bella took one last look around the yard and the woods. So much had happened there, and she would miss the peace this place had brought her. Standing, Edward took her hand, and she realized the only true peace she would ever need was in his arms.

"Are you ready, love? We don't want to miss seeing Mick and Beth off at the airport."

She nodded. _I love you, more than anything._

Edward smiled. "I love you, too, more than anything."

Hand-in-hand, they walked through the house Bella had shared with the only two men she had ever loved. Their footsteps echoed through the empty rooms, and she was glad Jackson and his wife would soon bring life back to what had been a happy place. Watching the house grow smaller as they drove away, she hoped, unlike the day she left Forks, she could take all the small moments and memories with her.

* * *

**A/N: Playlist song:  
http://www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=XgEfYGzojcA**


	23. One Neverending Kiss

_Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended._

**A/N: It's hard to believe that this is the last chapter. When I posted the first chapter, I wondered if anyone would read it. Not only did you read it, you left me wonderful reviews and recommended the story on your blogs and Twitter. I am very thankful for all your support.**

**Thank you to:**

**- My DH, who still doesn't quite understand this whole Twilight/fan fiction thing but tells me how much he likes my writing anyway.**

**- erikasbuddy for being my lovely beta and fellow Twilight/Rob/Moonlight/fanfic addict. Her edits and feedback were invaluable. (And I'm still saving Josef for you.)**

**- cutie_sstb for encouraging me, helping me when I was new to the fandom and fan fiction, and being the first to pimp my story. I (heart) you hard. (http://supersecrettwilightblog[dot]blogspot[dot]com/)**

**- bettigefecht for her encouragement and the beautiful animated button she created. It is the perfect representation of my story. (http://bettimusictwilight[dot]blogspot[dot]com/)**

**- MrsVanquish for her encouragement and for the awesome interview she did, which will be posted 11/30/09. (http://letsridethevanquish[dot]blogspot[dot]com/)**

**- Everyone who recommended my story on their blogs. *hugs***

**- Everyone who tweeted and RT about the story. *hugs***

**- Everyone who left a review. *hugs***

**- Everyone who read the story and simply enjoyed it. *hugs***

**Want to know what's in store next for Edward, Bella, Mick, and Beth? Make sure to read MrsVanquish's Breathe Me post on 11/30/09:  
http://letsridethevanquish[dot]blogspot[dot]com/**

**Playlist Song:  
http://www[dot]youtube[dot]com/watch?v=N7cRMu4UFaQ **

**Breathe Me page with updated playlist:****  
****http://fragilelittlehuman[dot]wordpress[dot]com/fan-fiction/breathe-me/****  
****  
****Breathe Me thread on the Twilighted Forum:****  
****http://www[dot]twilighted[dot]net/forum/viewtopic[dot]php?f=44&t=6150**

* * *

**Chapter 23: One Never-ending Kiss**

The three vampires and three humans sat in the seats at the airport terminal. After so much time together, Bella found it hard to believe the three couples were going their separate ways. Jackson and his wife were staying in Alabama and moving into their new home. Mick and Beth were returning to L.A. to plan their Autumn wedding. Bella and Edward were meeting the other Cullens in Anchorage and finally beginning their forever.

"Love, I'm going to get us checked in for our flight tonight," Edward said, kissing the crown of her head. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

Bella watched as her husband walked down the long hall. Every movement of his body sent tingling waves through her body, and she hoped she'd always feel the same way. When Edward turned at the end of the hall to smile at her, she winked at him.

_A kiss on the head will be completely unacceptable when you return._

His laugh echoed loudly as he walked away.

Mick took Edward's seat next to her. "How are you feeling? Did you make sure to eat properly this morning?" he said, taking her hand.

To explain her continued absence after their two-week "honeymoon," Mick told Jackson that Bella had contracted the H1N1 flu. After two additional weeks, Bella was able to control her thirst enough to see Jackson and his wife, although their weekly dinners ended. Worried about her control on a long plane trip, Mick advised her to have a big retail blood meal the night before.

"I'm fine, really," she said, patting their joined hands. "You don't need to worry."

Beth laughed from the chair across the hall. "He doesn't know how _not_ to worry. It's what he does."

Mick stuck his tongue out at Beth, looking very much like a three-year old. "I keep you out of trouble, don't I?" Walking over to Beth, he kissed her hard before sitting down again next to her. Bella watched as he took Beth's hand, playing with the engagement ring on her finger.

"I just don't understand why you have to move so far away," Jackson said, leaning forward so he could see Bella from his place three seats down.

"Bella explained that already, baby," Jackson's wife interjected. "Edward's family is there, and they want to be with them."

"Whatever. Alaska's too fucking cold." When everyone stared at him, Jackson threw his hands up. "What? It is."

The laughter of the group was interrupted when Edward stomped down the hall and stopped in front of Bella. "We have a problem. Someone's cancelled our plane tickets."

Bella jumped out of her seat. "What? Who would do that? We've got to call Carlisle and let him know."

While she rummaged in her bag for her cell phone, Bella felt Beth tap on her shoulder. "Josef cancelled them."

"Why?" Edward and Bella shouted in unison.

Beth raised her hand, and a set of keys dangled from her index finger. "He wanted you to have the Jag, and he cancelled the tickets since you'd need to drive it home. It's in section D next to the light pole."

"I still don't understand," Edward said, taking the keys from Beth. "He doesn't even really know us."

"That's Josef for you," Mick sneered. "The king of the grand gesture."

"He wanted me to give you this note, Bella." Beth held out an ivory linen envelope addressed to Bella in large, elaborate script.

Bella ripped open the envelope, reading the note as Edward peered over her shoulder.

_ Dearest Bella,_

_ Congratulations on your marriage and on joining our elite community. I'm sure you made a beautiful bride and make an exquisite vampire. Please accept the car as a wedding gift. I am always a plane ride away if you should ever need me._

_ Yours,_

_ Josef_

_ P.S. Tell Sparklepuss I said hello.  
_

As she folded the note and shoved it in her pocket, Bella heard both Edward and Mick growl.

"Mick and Beth," Jackson's wife said, breaking the tension. "It's time to board the plane."

Bella and Beth hugged tightly, and Bella could feel the tears falling down Beth's cheeks against her own. "Thank you so much for letting us borrow Mick for so long. And thank you for being here for us. We're both so grateful."

Beth pulled away slightly, her arms still around Bella's shoulders. "Hey, don't talk like we'll never see each other again. You and Edward will be at the wedding in the Fall, don't forget."

Beth moved to hug Edward while Mick took Bella into a warm embrace. "Bells," he whispered, "I hope you know how much I love you." Cradling her, he tenderly kissed her forehead. "I am so proud to be your sire."

"I love you, too. I hope I continue to make you proud," she said, her voice choked with emotion. Kissing him on the cheek, she reluctantly let him go.

Edward extended his hand to Mick, who, looking offended, ignored it and yanked Edward into a vigorous bear hug. "You didn't think I was going to let you off that easy, did you?"

Finally relenting, Edward smiled and returned the hug. "Okay, you brute! You win!"

Beth and Mick gave one more round of hugs before walking to the security checkpoint. Feeling Edward's fingers thread through hers, Bella leaned against his shoulder. The day she met Mick, she never imagined how important he would become to her. He helped bring her and Edward back together. He supported her through the dark days after they lost Charlie. He gave her eternity. Mick was now part of her, and she ached as she watched him go.

Just before they walked out of sight, Mick and Beth stopped. Turning around, Mick bellowed, "Edward, you better take care of my girl!" He smiled once last time, and they disappeared.

The four remaining friends stood in silence until Jackson finally spoke. "I guess we need to move stuff from our car to your new ride."

Edward and Bella walked to the parking deck and found the Jaguar. Waiting for Jackson and his wife to pull their car around, Edward popped the trunk. Inside they found a cooler with an attached note from Mick.

_B - Since you're driving cross-country, you'll need this. I even got some of your favorite type. - M_

"Well," Bella laughed, "the silly vampire does think of everything, doesn't he?"

Jackson parked his car behind them, and, as he and Edward transferred luggage between the cars, Jackson's wife tugged Bella's arm. Her hand on Bella's elbow, she escorted Bella between the cars and turned her back to the men.

"Bella," she whispered, "I just wanted you to know how much Jackson and I will miss you. You and Charlie became family to us, and we'll miss you and Edward terribly."

"We'll miss you both, too, Catie." Bella hugged her tightly.

Pulling away, Jackson's wife continued to whisper. "And, just so you know," she said, grinning broadly as a pair of sharp fangs extended inside her mouth, "you'll always have friends here in Alabama."

Bella stood frozen in stunned silence as Jackson's wife retracted her fangs and walked away. Hugging Edward and saying her goodbyes, she climbed into Jackson's car as if nothing had happened.

Still in shock, Bella didn't hear Jackson speaking to her until he shook her shoulder. "Bella, sweetie, are you okay? You look like you've just seen a ghost."

Shaking her head, she looked at Jackson. "No, no I'm fine." She threw her arms around him and squeezed tightly. "It's just that I'm going to miss you so much."

"Me, too, Bella. You're like a little sister to me." Jackson rocked her back and forth as they continued to embrace. "Don't get into too much trouble up there, okay?"

"I won't, I promise. Be safe yourself," she said, looking warily at his wife's silhouette through the car window.

Saying their goodbyes, Jackson and Bella parted, and she and Edward watched as they drove away. Edward held the passenger door open as Bella entered the car, shutting it quietly behind her. Her leg bounced nervously as she waited for Edward to sit in the driver's seat.

As soon as they pulled out of the parking spot, Bella turned to Edward. "How could you not tell me Catie's a vampire?"

"It wasn't my secret to tell."

"Oh my God, Edward!" She threw her hands up in dismay. "Does Jackson know?"

"Yes, he does."

She thought for a moment and gazed at Edward with wide eyes. "She knows about me. Did she tell him about me?"

Stopping to yield to traffic, Edward patted her knee. "It's not her secret to tell."

Bella sighed. Just when she thought she understood everything, something new was always thrown in her path. She might not be physically clumsy, but she definitely still felt karmically challenged.

"Jackson asked me to let you know they found Phelps body," Edward said warily.

Bella gasped. "Where? How?"

"Let's just say what was left of him was found in a vat of acid in a meth lab." Edward grimaced. "They've attributed it to, as Jackson put it, bad karma and disgruntled partners."

"Huh, how 'bout that." Bella relaxed in her seat, letting her head fall back on the headrest. Keeping her thoughts to herself, she smiled.

_Maybe I'm not as karmically fucked up as I thought._

~*~

Even though Bella's new vampire body was much faster than her human one, Edward still liked to run with her on his back. Three days into their road trip, they stopped in Forks to visit Angela and Ben, and Edward planned this excursion to bring them full circle. Stopping, he slid her down his back until her feet were on the ground.

It was winter, and their meadow was not in full bloom as it had been their first time there. Still, it was beautiful, not only for its natural wonder but also for the memories it held. Lying on the cold ground, he pulled Bella down next to him. She rested her head on his chest, and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Do you remember the first time we came here?" he asked, brushing the fingertips of his free hand along her jaw.

She sighed. "Of course I do. It was the first time you allowed yourself to be open with me."

"Yes, and, if I'd just remembered how right we felt that day, we could have avoided so much wasted time."

Bella turned over and propped herself up on her elbows. Looking up at her, Edward saw the trust and forgiveness he so desperately needed. "Baby," she whispered, "none of that matters now. Starting today, we have forever to be together." She gently brushed her lips along his jaw until they hovered over his mouth. "Just forget everything and kiss me."

Fisting her hair in his hands, he brought her mouth to his, slowly moving his lips with hers until he felt the tip of her tongue press against him. As their mouths opened to each other, he tilted her head, gaining deeper and deeper access to her sweet taste. Kissing, nibbling, and moaning, they lay in each others arms until the sky began to darken.

"Edward," Bella said, pulling away and sitting up, "it's time to go."

He sat up next to her, snaking his arm around her waist. "Just a few more minutes, please."

She nodded then leaned her head on his shoulder. "Thank you for taking me to visit Angela and Ben. And thank you for flying them out for the funeral and then the wedding."

"No thanks needed."

"Thank you, too, for what you did for Annie. I know you were the one who set up the treatment fund for her."

"It was nothing," he said, kissing her on the temple.

"Maybe to you, but it means everything to Annie and her mother. She'll be able to get the best treatment without worrying about how much it costs. You did that for her."

"You're welcome. I need to tell you something, too," Edward whispered. When he felt Bella's head nod, he continued. "The movers found a box in your attic. It appeared to be full of...mementos of ours. I had them ship it to Anchorage with the other things we kept. I hope that's okay."

"I was going to get rid of that stuff when we moved, but Dad kept it." Her voice broke as it always did when her memories of Charlie made her sad. "The things you took from me when you left, what did you do with them?"

Edward grimaced, and he wondered if he'd ever think of that time without his chest aching painfully. "I hid them under your floorboards. Alice retrieved them for us during the move to Anchorage, and everything is waiting for us there."

Falling silent, they sat holding each other where it all began. When Edward left her in the deep woods of Forks, he told himself he was doing so to protect her. She was small and fragile and needed him to shield her from the world. But the Bella in his arms, the woman he found in Alabama, the woman he never stopped loving and who he'd married, was amazingly strong, fiercely loyal, and incredibly resilient. He finally realized she'd always been those things and he'd only been too blind to see it. He promised himself he would never fail to see her clearly again. He would never again betray her love.

Tenderly kissing her lips once more, Edward stood and offered her his hand. "Mrs. Cullen, it's time to go home."

Bella gazed at him with more love than he thought possible. _Everything is waiting for us there._

She clasped his hand tightly, and he pulled her to her feet. "Can I carry you back to the car?" he asked hopefully.

"I want to run." Moving towards the woods, Bella tugged his hand. "Will you run with me, Mr. Cullen?"

Edward smiled and nodded. "Lead the way, love."

Side by side, they ran through the dark woods, never faltering, never stumbling, never letting each other go.

**THE END**


End file.
